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Adolescents in the 13 to 18-year-old range are exploring their identity and navigating increased independence. These years are a time when teens experiment with new roles and responsibilities and tend to place increasing value on peer relationships. This presents a challenge for many parents, as they must balance boundaries and rules with their teens’ greater autonomy. So, when thinking about how to tell your teen about your separation and divorce, it is important to keep in mind that although separation/divorce can be a time of great upheaval for all involved, your teens can navigate new life and family roles and structures with your guidance and support.
Typical Reactions- Adolescents
Common reactions of adolescents to divorce or separation include being less talkative, as they may withdraw temporarily to cope with feelings. They can also exhibit angry and rebellious behavior, may engage in sexual behavior, and use drugs and/or alcohol as a way to escape. When family stability is threatened, teens may look more to peers for support and acceptance, which may then lead to a greater vulnerability to peer pressure for engaging in risky behaviors. It is common to see a decline in school performance for adolescents reacting to parental separation or divorce. They may be preoccupied with loss of family and may adopt an adult role. Reactions seen in preteens may also be present. These include exhibiting sadness, loneliness, insecurity, anger, and feelings of helplessness. They may attempt to help resolve parental differences, pretend they are okay, choose one parent over another, or complain of headaches, stomachaches, or other physical ailments.
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