Managing Coaching and Mentoring Modes

Mentoring is usually defined as advice and guidance given by a more experienced person to a novice. While a mentor can and may use coaching strategies, the mentoring relationship is characterized by the movement of knowledge and wisdom from the mentor to the mentee, and by the mentor having the greater authority in the relationship. By contrast, coaching assumes the expertise lies with the coachee, and features an equal-power relationship. 

Both of these roles hold great value, and often a coach may feel compelled to offer advice or wisdom from their own experience. However, if the conversation shifts toward the guidance coming from the coach and away from the coachee, it can change the power structure and focus, and put the coachee into the role of a more passive receiver. This may make it tougher for a coachee to muster initiative and agency. 

Coaches, if you find you tend to shift into mentoring, consider less dominant ways to offer suggestions when the moment is ripe. Let's say a student is talking about how they feel intimidated by their instructor. Rather than going into detail about the benefits of developing relationships with instructors, try asking "What would it feel like to go to office hours this Tuesday for the first time?" and letting the student talk through emotions and potential actions. As you listen, you may find moments to provide advice attuned to the needs identified by the student. Given the chance, the coachee can gradually learn to take action in their life and trust their instincts.

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