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March, 2023
Newsletter from The Marriage Education and Resource Center (MERCY)
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How was your Valentine's Day? When we think of Valentine's Day, we often associate it with romance.
Dr. Paul Tripp, pastor, conference speaker, best-selling and award-winning Christian author says, "While romantic gestures, gifts, and surprises are important in a healthy marriage, romance is not love. Romance is not a fruit of the Spirit. You can be a follower of Jesus, filled with the Holy Spirit, lacking romance yet incarnating the love of Christ."
This is love, Tripp pointed out: "Not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to
love one another" (1 John 4::10-11, ESV)."
Tripp goes on to explain 23 ways to express cruciform love - "in the shape of the Cross" love in 2023. Here are a few to begin:
- Love is willing self-sacrifice for the good of another that does not require reciprocation or that the person being loved is deserving.
- Love is being willing to have your life complicated by the needs and struggles of another without impatience or anger.
- Love means being willing, when confronted by another, to examine your heart rather than rising to your defense or shifting the focus.
To read the rest of Tripp's explanations, click here
| Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Marriage | |
We've all heard of it and many have used it. Chris Ownby with First Things First offers some advice on this subject.
Something is said, something is done without you being informed, or something is left undone and things head south.
Passive-aggressive behavior is when a person expresses anger or annoyance in an indirect way. Ownby says, "A passive-aggressive response in marriage is marked with quiet bitterness. It is often a way to punish the offender emotionally, letting them 'wallow in their sin' for a while. The 'offended' seemingly avoids the conflict while putting the 'offender' in a place of guilt, shame and discomfort. It is a power play, a form of manipulation and a highly ineffective way of dealing with conflict. . ."
To read about some specific examples and how you can end passive-aggressive behavior in your marriage, click here
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A Lasting Promise
April 14-15, 2023
Hosted by Living Waters Church
5425 Frankfort Road
Shelbyville, KY
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This is a great event! The focus is to help couples develop marital oneness by enhancing communication and relationship skills.
Cost: $150 per couple before March 19 and $160 per couple until April 9.
For more information, or to register, click here
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Husband and Wife Journey
April 28-30, 2023
Harvest Heights Orchard
and Vineyard in Scottville, KY
Conflict and coexistence were not God's design for marriage; it can be so much more. The Growing Your Marriage team invites you to embark on a journey with your loved one, blending biblical teachings with rest and recreation, in a beautiful location.
Cost: $300 which includes housing, program materials, meals-snacks, recreational activities and more. If you could benefit from a get-away and enhance your marriage, we believe you will love this retreat.
For more information or to register, click here.
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Blended and Blessed
April 29
Livestream
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Blended and Blessed is a one-day live event and livestream just for stepfamily couples, dating couples with kids, and those who care about blended families.
While the event is located in Florida, you can livestream it. It is a day of great speakers, worship, encouragement and practical help.
Cost to Livestream is $20. To register, click here
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Celebrate Your Marriage
May 21-23
Grand Hotel - Mackinac Island, MI
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Try These Date Nights!!
With Dave & Ashley Willis
Need some fun date night ideas? Dave & Ashley talk all things date night, including fun date night ideas, date night advice, and date night rules! Stick around until the end to hear Dave & Ashley's favorite date nights!
| 5 Common Reasons for Divorce | |
Would you believe according to many therapists, the #1 reason couples get divorced is lack of premarital planning?
"Many couples enter into marriage without discussing the expectations of their relationship," says Kalley Hartman, LMFT at Ocean Recovery. "Without having a clear understanding of how to manage and communicate can lead to feelings of frustration and confusion once in a long-term commitment."
The other ones listed were:
2) Financial difficulties
3) Infidelity
4) Addiction or substance abuse
5) Communication
If you need help, MERCY can possibly help you or direct you to where to get help. Simply, email us: pdhud9@aol.com or call/text (502) 939-0121.
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If you are looking for a great get-away and a wonderful time to enhance your marriage, "Celebrate Your Marriage" may be just what
is needed.
Jay and Laura Laffoon have been helping couples through laughter and growth for years. And their special guest this year is Dr. Gary Chapman, author of the best-selling book, The Five Love Languages.
For more information about cost, schedule, etc. and/or to register, click here
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A New Beginning -
Online Workshop
March 31-April 2
A counselor-led workshop designed specifically for coupes in crisis. Three days could turn your marriage around.
Cost: $1,295 per couple
For more information, click here or call (800) 650-9995
or (615) 627-0751.
Registration deadline March 24
| As you know, Bob and Carol Esham with MERCI Indiana offer some wonderful marriage workshops, mentoring, studies and more. Therefore, we would love for you to listen to a recent interview they had on WayFM. | | |
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Couple's Coupletime Activity
Discuss the following questions:
- What do you most enjoy about our relationship?
- How can we have more fun this year?
- How did we grow as a couple this past year, spiritually, emotionally and physically?
- What is something I can do to support you better?
- What could I do to make our marriage better?
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MERCY'S Status Report for 2022 | | |
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Each year we like to share with you some of the activities the Lord has allowed MERCY to achieve.
- MERCY offered a fun date night with Christian comedian Juanita Lolita from Florida. 125 people attended the event and the feedback was very positive.
- MERCY offered a free ministry luncheon at Claudia Sanders in Shelbyville, KY. Fourteen pastors/ministry leaders attended and we received new mentoring requests as a result.
- David and Penny mentored 11 couples in 2022. Mentoring couples involves working with each couple 16-18 hours, plus hours of homework they are requested to complete. There is a strong emphasis on Spiritual aspects in MERCY'S program. In addition, we worked with two individuals personally. Two of our trained mentor couples worked with additional couples.
- One Coupletime group meets monthly to work on a biblically-based marriage activity, pray for one another and fellowship.
- MERCY was able to give away free resources for the Marriage 911 program where a trained mentor works with another individual. This is a 12-week program and is gender-to-gender based.
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