In honor of this month's newsletter, my wish is for you to see yourself through the eyes of those who love you. You are strong, you are beautiful, you are loved and you are important.

Now scroll down to see the signs of low self-esteem and our top tips for building self-esteem in yourself (and your children)!

Happy Summer!

Maslow's hierarchy of needs is a theory of human motivation, stating that all humans have an inherent drive to become "self-actualized."

Meaning? We all desire to be the best version of ourselves, live up to our true potential, and lead a truly happy and fulfilled life. His theory states that there are five levels of needs that must be met, and that it's difficult to achieve the next level until the need underneath has been completed.

Self-esteem sits at number 4 near the top of the pyramid, highlighting that it is a complex social concept that is a necessary component for becoming our best self. That being said, self-esteem is not easy to achieve. It's probably almost as difficult as climbing an actual pyramid! It's a journey that takes time, effort and lots of strength.. but once you reach the summit.. the view is beautiful.

What better time to start you or your child's journey to the top of the pyramid than during the summer months? Emily Kavanagh, M.S., LLP, has some fun tips for you below.

At McCaskill Family Services, we specialize in working with adults, children, teenagers and families with various presenting issues. If you or someone you know could benefit from our services, please contact us. Our clinicians are trained in empirically-based techniques, and would be happy to promptly schedule an appointment in person or via tele-health. We can be reached by phone at 734-416-9098 or by email at office@mccaskillfamilyservices.com.

It's so easy to focus on the negative aspects of ourselves. We are so hard on ourselves, spending time ruminating about what we wish we could change, how we can improve, and thinking about all the bad things we wish we weren't. What happens when we shift our mindset to focusing on the wonderful things that we are?

Positive Thoughts & Perceptions

Studies have shown use that people who have high-self esteem suffer less from certain mental illnesses, and that teens with high self-esteem are less likely to fall victim to peer pressure and low academic achievement.... just to name a few reasons!

When we were babies (or when our babies were babies) we can remember a time that we walked around with only diapers on. We happily poked at our pudgy bellies, gnawed our own feet, smiled with food our on faces, and felt proud of mismatched outfits we put together that were out of season. We had no problem telling someone, "I don't like to play this game", "Hey! Look at me!" or "I'm feeling scared." We LOVED ourselves; our bodies, our personality, our choices.

What happened to us?

Somewhere along the way, we began to look at ourselves through a different lens. We saw other bellies and realized they weren't as round as ours, a peer teased us for something we wore, and we became scared to say what we needed or how we felt out of a fear of conflict and abandonment. Throw in socially constructed labels of what is "good", "bad", "pretty" and "ugly", promoted momentarily by (edited) social media, and you have the perfect recipe for low self-esteem. Add other naturally occurring negative experiences (break-ups, job losses, jealous neighbors), and getting back to our self-loving roots seems impossible.

The ironic part of all of this, is that true self-esteem exists DESPITE the negative events and constructs present in our lives. When we have good self-esteem, we communicate what we need without fearing that if someone leave us, we won't make it. When we have good self-esteem, we can wear a tu-tu and say, " I love this!" When we make a mistake or lose a job, we can say, "This is a new opportunity for growth." Good self-esteem makes us less vulnerable to life's negatives, and therefore, it is a must for us to build. Self-love, self-esteem, self-worth, all start with the word "self" for a reason...we can't find these virtues anywhere else but within.

"We like something because, we love something although. "-Henri Demonterlant

Fill in the parentheses... Although (something negative), I (something positive).

Although I'm not good at math, I have other intellectual strengths.

Although I fell off path, I will keep going.

Although I don't have my ideal body, I am thankful I am healthy.

Although I yelled at my kids, I am still a loving mother.

I can't wait to see you rockin' that tu-tu and channeling that confident, care-free kiddo that still lives inside us all. Happy Self-Esteem Building - Jaclyn

I'd like to personally thank you for staying in touch with our practice, and hope you find this newsletter inspirational and informative. If you or someone you know would like to schedule an appointment with me, please contact our office at 734-416-9098 or email us at office@mccaskillfamilyservices.com. I look forward to working with you!