Whether in a mentoring relationship, friendship, or with a family member, we’ve all been in a position of wondering whether we should say or do something. Intervene or let it go?
Still it eats at us. Maybe we even lose sleep over it. Could be as simple as a post we read on social media or serious like a conversation we overheard or were involved in and we didn’t know what to say, or if we should say anything. So we don’t. Can you think of a situation like that you’ve been in recently?
We wonder if it’s really any of our business or maybe it is our business and affects us personally. We don’t want to say the wrong thing, so we refrain from saying anything. Or we blurt out a response that we later wish we hadn’t said.
Are you tracking with me here? Recently faced with this dilemma, I wanted to just walk away from it. But I cared about the person involved and thought maybe I had a perspective they hadn’t seen because they were too close to the problem.
Here’s what I did and hope that I would do it every time, but just like you, I’m fallible.
James 1:5–6 reminds us: “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”
Step 1. Pray. Prayerfully seek the Holy Spirit’s wise direction and guidance gleaned from reading God’s Word and asking Him to reveal something to you. Then listen for and expect an answer. Spiritual discernment and godly wisdom lets God guide, even when He says retreat and don’t get involved. He’s got it handled and doesn’t need your help.
The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit. 1 Cor. 2:14
Step 2. Be patient. Discernment takes time and effort to develop as we grow and mature in our faith and develop an ability to sense God’s plan and purpose in a given situation. He may not give an answer as quickly as we would like, but while you wait stay peaceful, not agitated.
Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord. Ps. 27:14
3. Obey. Expectantly ask God for the willingness, strength, and desire to take whatever action your discernment dictates that He’s telling you to do and let God handle the consequences. That’s probably the hardest part, especially if He says to do nothing. But if He wants you to speak up, a great verse to remember is . . .
And this is the secret: Christ lives in you. This gives you assurance of sharing his glory. So we tell others about Christ, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all the wisdom God has given us. Col. 1:27-28 NLT
Mother’s Day is in a few weeks, and it’s a difficult day for estranged moms and daughters, as I was from my mom for many years. Or for mommies-in-waiting struggling with infertility. We need to be careful, wise, and discerning when we talk to these women, and especially loving to them on Mother’s Day. Perhaps one of the featured books this month would be an appropriate gift for them. Pray about it. Be Patient. Obey.
As the Lord assured the prophet Jeremiah so He says to each of us, “For you must go wherever I send you and say whatever I tell you.” Jer. 1:7
Some of us are more sensitive than others are to the still small voice of God, but with patience, studying—not just reading—God’s Word, and a desire to know and obey God’s will, we all have the ability to seek and obtain discernment to be braver and wiser than we ever thought possible.
You will notice that this is our April/May newsletter. My helpmate in AHW Ministries who publishes this newsletter, my hubby Dave, is having knee replacement surgery on May 11! So he won’t be at his desk for a while and I’ll be busy helping him recover! We appreciate your prayers. God willing, we’ll have a June newsletter and a good progress report.
About His Work with you,
Janet
New Blog Posts:
PS: We’re running low on the CD/DVD packet in the Woman to Woman Mentoring DVD Leader Kits and won’t be reproducing more when they’re gone. So if you were thinking about getting a kit for your church, now would be the time.
PSSSSS: Please share with us a story from your mentoring ministry to encourage other churches.
