Radcliffe Giving:
Instilling the Act of Giving
Happy December! Thanksgiving has come and gone. Some of our community members are fully engaged in the season of Hanukkah while other children are eagerly anticipating Christmas. To take the time to teach children the importance of giving is a powerful life skill. I think it is even more gratifying for our kids than other children because I believe our students are more attuned to the feelings of others. Even though some of our children may not be able to identify or articulate those feelings, the sense of joy they will experience when they give a gift (whether it is an object or an action) is incredibly positive. Also, it helps them to work on connections with others. "I saw this and thought of you" goes such a long way when building relationships with others.
Consider involving your children as much as possible in the season of giving. This request comes with personal experience and reflection about my children's behaviors, especially when they were in their tweens. In my earnestness to create the perfect Christmas season, I often forgot to involve my kids in the process! I would do everything myself, so when Christmas came around, my kids would be more interested in tearing open their presents than enjoying the moment or enjoying watching their grandparents or family members open something that was (supposedly) from them. I would then feel frustrated and disheartened. I now realize that part of the problem came from the very fact that my kids hadn't been actively involved in making or buying gifts for others. They felt no connection to anyone's moment other than their own. Fortunately, this is something that is easily rectified!
At Radcliffe Creek School, we talk a lot about explicit instruction. For children (especially those children who learn differently), it is often easier to teach them these social skills than to expect them to eventually infer the art of giving gifts.
Here's a list of suggestions for how to involve your child in giving gifts:
- I recommend that together as a family you create a list of people you would like to give gifts to during the holiday season. It should involve beloved family members, close friends, and others like the bus driver or the postal worker.
- Talk to them about a budget and ask for ideas on how to be creative in spreading holiday cheer. If your children do not have their own money, maybe give them a small amount of money to spend on their siblings, cousins, or friends. My daughter once bought all her extended family gifts at Dollar Tree, but what mattered most was the thought behind the gift. There are also many places to find easy and cute holiday crafts that your kids could make to give to others. I am a huge fan of Pinterest which is a wonderful resource for kid-friendly ideas on how to spread holiday cheer.
-As you discuss people on your gift-giving list, talk about what you know the person likes to do, passions they have, or favorite foods, and jot down some of these ideas. If you go shopping or browse the internet, have your children look with you. Maybe give them a couple of choices for someone's gift and let your child make the final decision.
-Wrapping gifts is an art! But once those presents are bought or made, try to get your child to help you wrap. Think about what they could do to help. Could they write out the tag, or add tissue paper to a gift bag?
-If possible, have your child help you present the gift. If you made cookies for the neighbor, let them help you deliver the goodies and wish that person "Happy Holidays."
There are many demands that the holiday season places upon families. I know how easy it can be to be swept up in the craziness of the season. However, taking the time to sit and think together about how to make other people happy is so restorative and precious. With time and practice, I hope you will learn about the depth of kindness and love your child possesses.
Wishing you a lovely weekend with some happy brainstorming!
Head of School
