“A Place to Weep”

         I’ll be honest and tell you that I don’t know what I’m doing. There was an attempt to hold a prayer vigil; but nothing could be decided so we’re having more talks about that. There are plenty of statements produced by denominations, council of churches, non-profits using fancy words and proclamations, some calling for action and some for non-action. I can share some of those if you’d like. I’ve reached out to people I know who have ties in Israel and Palestine.

         Still, I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know what would be most helpful or create any meaningful change. I don’t know how to bring about peace. But I do know how to make space, to offer a quiet place to sit with others who may feel the same way about the not knowing and with others who just want a place to grieve, to say in community, “War is terrible and my heart is broken and I mourn the losses in our world. God, have mercy.” I can do that.

         In his book, ReaLivePreacher.com, Gordon Atkinson writes about needing a place like that. He found his solace in a small mountain church in Colorado where his family goes every year for vacation. He says he goes there to cry. He explains, “I cry in their church because I can’t cry in my own. I’m not suggesting we discourage crying at our church. I’m saying I am not ABLE to cry there. Being in charge shuts something down in me, I think. So every summer in Creede I unpack a year’s worth of sorrow, joy, and wonder. I cry in their church because it is my time to be served. I’m like the woman who prepares the meals for her family each day. One day she comes home and her children have prepared a meal for her. She bursts into tears because it’s her turn to receive. It doesn’t mean she wants to stop cooking. It’s just nice that it’s her turn.”

         He goes on. “I cry for those reasons, but mostly I cry because at Creede Community Church I can see the truth. Sitting in that simple pew on the back row, I see the Church Universal in all her glory and silliness. The truth is, we are not sophisticated at all. We are nothing more than children, sticking our drawings to the fridge with tiny magnets, offering our best to the heavens on a wing and a prayer. We are precious, but perhaps only in God’s sight. I think messy little boys and girls praying in church must be irresistible to God. When God slows down and licks his fingers to slick down my cowlick, I catch a fleeting glimpse of the hem of his robe. And a glimpse is more than enough for me. And in that moment, I cry from pure joy and relief.”

         Maybe you need to cry. Or maybe you just need to catch a glimpse of our God. Maybe you just need to hear someone else say, “I don’t know what to do either.” Whatever your reasons might be, you are invited to come to the chapel at First Presbyterian Church in Albuquerque at noon on Thursdays to sit in silence, to remember God’s faithfulness, to search for God, or just to weep.

         There’s not a lot more I can offer; but I can certainly do that.

 You are the Light of the World.

With Love,

Lynne

First Presbyterian Church

215 Locust Street NE

Albuquerque, NM 87102