Message from Our Director
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Dear Friends,
One of my most vivid childhood memories is a scene from a film called Animals Are Beautiful People. It showed how a hunter in the Kalahari Desert in southern Africa tricked a baboon into showing him a hidden source of water, by trapping it, waiting until it was thirsty, then releasing it and following it to the oasis.
What made an impression on me then — and still fascinates me now — is how the hunter trapped the baboon. He drilled a hole, just big enough for the baboon's paw to fit inside, into an anthill. Then, making sure the baboon was watching, he pretended to eat some seeds, then placed a pile of them inside the hole. The hunter hid, and the baboon's curiosity got the better of it. It reached into the hole and grabbed the seeds, but having closed its fist around them, it could not fit its hand back through the hole. Even when it saw the hunter coming, even when the hunter began to put a leash around its neck, even when it was completely trapped, that baboon would not let go of the seeds so that it could get free and run away.
How often we behave like that foolish baboon! Satan and his minions tempt us with all sorts of things, and curiosity or desire or both lead us straight into the Enemy's trap. Once we find the forbidden pleasure we often become so attached to it that, even though we know it is not good for us, we just can't seem to let go. Those who have experienced addiction in their own lives or the life of a loved one know this situation quite well, but it affects all of us in our struggle with temptation and sin, in ways large and small.
The season of Lent is a time for us to let go of the things of the world so that on Easter Sunday we may wholeheartedly renew our baptismal promises in which we reject sin and Satan, and give ourselves completely to the Triune God. Voluntary fasting and abstinence teach us to go without things that please the body, and thus overcome gluttony and lust. By sacrificial almsgiving we learn to let go of money and material things that we do not need, and to reject the greed that accumulates possessions, the sloth that finds comfort in material things, and the envy and anger that poison our hearts when we feel we do not have enough. A more intentional commitment to prayer, especially in the form of adoration and intercession, helps us to overcome pride, selfishness and self-reliance, and to place our faith and hope in God and His Providence, and to love Him and our neighbor with generous hearts.
I pray that this Lent will continue to be a fruitful time for you, and lead you to a deeper relationship with God and with your loved ones. The paradox of discipleship is that, the more we surrender to God, the freer we become. Let us ask Him for the grace we need to let go of the attachments we have made to this world, so that we can cling more tightly to Him.
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Father Philip G. Bochanski
Executive Director
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News
- Save the Date for the Annual Courage & EnCourage Conference
- Sister Bethany Madonna of the Sisters of Life to speak on prayer
- Be Sure to Share Your Perspective for Synod on Synodality
- Wanted: Your Stories for Our Blog
- Survey: What are Your Favorite Spiritual Resources?
- Rest in Peace, Fr. John Spellman, Friend of Courage
- Fr. James Lloyd on Conversation with Cardinal Dolan
General Resources
- Bishop Konderla and Fr. Bochanski on Catholic Man Show
Courage
- Courage Members Featured on Catholic Answers Live
EnCourage
- Accompanying Our Children in their Difficulties and Failings
Courage Internacional — For our Spanish-Speaking Members and Friends
- March Newsletter in Spanish
Pastoral Resources
- Clergy Study Day July 27: Save the Date
- Truth & Love Provides Resources for Pastoral Care
Gender Identity Discordance
- Communicating with Children About Sexual Identity
- Archdiocese of Milwaukee Issues Gender Theory Document
Events
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"Lord Teach us to Pray"
July 28 –31, 2022
Clergy Study Day July 27
University of St. Mary of the Lake
Mundelein, Illinois
Registration opens May 1
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This year we will focus on developing our interior life, especially as prescribed through the shared goal of Courage and EnCourage members: "To dedicate our entire lives to Christ through service to others, spiritual reading, prayer, meditation, individual spiritual direction, frequent attendance at Mass, and the frequent reception of the sacraments of Reconciliation and Holy Eucharist."
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One of our plenary speakers will be Sister Bethany Madonna, SV, the local superior of the Sisters of Life in Phoenix. A popular conference speaker on spirituality, she will be talking with us about prayer, which is essential to growing in intimacy with God. In her vocation story, Sister explains how the desires of her heart have been fulfilled by giving and receiving love in relationship with God and His people.
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Be Sure to Share Your Perspective for Synod on Synodality
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From Father Philip Bochanski, our executive director:
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I would like to remind you about the importance of participation in the upcoming Synod of Bishops. The Holy Father has invited and encouraged Catholics around the world to take part in local listening sessions in their parishes and dioceses so that the experiences and needs of the whole Church can be brought to the Synod for the bishops' careful pastoral consideration. I urge you to communicate with your local pastor and bishop, especially to share your perspectives, needs, and experiences regarding the Church's teaching on chastity and same-sex attractions, and whether or not you are finding the support and accompaniment you are looking for as you strive to carry out God's will in your lives.
This kind of sharing is best done locally so that your pastors and bishops can appreciate the needs of their own flocks, as well as pass them along to the universal Church. We have compiled some reflection prompts to help you prepare for participation. If you are hesitant to reveal your experiences in public, your diocese may provide ways to share your input in a more private way. You can also send your comments to the Courage office; we would be happy to pass them along to your local diocese while protecting your privacy. Please be sure to include the name of your diocese.
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Check your diocesan and parish websites for ways to participate locally.
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Wanted: Your Stories for Our Blog
Courage and EnCourage members, chaplains — all invited to share
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We invite you to prayerfully consider how you might be able to give glory to God and encourage the Courage and EnCourage family by submitting a post for our blog. The Upper Room blog is where our members and chaplains share stories of God's work in their lives. Your submission doesn't have to be long (just 750–950 words). A simple account of a turning point, a significant incident, or a moment of inspiration would be great! It's fine if you wish to remain anonymous.
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Survey: What are Your Favorite Spiritual Resources?
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Since our 2022 Annual Courage and EnCourage conference will be focusing on the spiritual life, we are surveying our readers to find out what has been most helpful to you in this area. We'd really appreciate you spending a couple of minutes telling us about your favorite resources for prayer and spiritual reading as well as your favorite retreats. We plan to share the results after the conference so that we can benefit from each other's experiences.
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Rest in Peace, Fr. John Spellman, OSFS, Friend of Courage
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Please pray for the repose of the soul of Father John Spellman, OSFS. He was a brother priest of our founding director, Father John Harvey, OSFS, in the Oblates of Francis de Sales. He was a good friend of Courage, serving in our central office at times when Father Harvey was away, attending annual conferences, providing support as an EnCourage chaplain in Wilmington, Delaware, and regularly offering his services in a variety of additional ways. He ministered in Catholic secondary schools for twenty-five years and served as a chaplain in the United States Navy for twenty-eight years, including active duty with the Marine Corp.
Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him. May he rest in peace. Amen.
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Fr. James B. Lloyd on Conversation with Cardinal Dolan
Cardinal admires Father's ministry with Courage
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On April 3, beloved longtime New York City Courage chaplain, Father James B. Lloyd, CSP, will be celebrating his 101st birthday. Last summer he was a special guest on Cardinal Timothy Dolan's show. His interview starts at 33:35. The cardinal was eager to talk with him about the apostolate of Courage (starting at 41:48), which he "admires immensely." Cardinal Dolan affirmed Father Lloyd's ministry by telling him about penitents whom he has referred to Father. They have returned to the cardinal later to tell him how much they appreciate Father Lloyd who "loved them enough to tell them the truth."
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Bishop Konderla and Fr. Bochanski on Catholic Man Show
Insights for all: Courage, EnCourage, and those who provide pastoral care
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Courage executive director, Father Philip Bochanski, recently visited the Diocese of Tulsa. While he was there, he and Bishop David Konderla (a former Courage chaplain) were guests on The Catholic Man Show. They had a good conversation about the best ways to talk about Church teaching on same-sex attractions. The remainder of the discussion revolved around how individuals who live with same-sex attractions can find fulfillment and freedom in living the virtue of chastity, authentic friendship, spiritual fatherhood, and ultimately in a trusting, loving relationship with the Lord. Bishop Konderla encouraged listeners to grow in understanding of God's love for them by meditating on His face when He thinks of them: "The Lord doesn't [just] tolerate us …; His face lights up."
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Courage Members Featured on Catholic Answers Live
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On February 21, Paul Darrow, one of the Courage members featured in the documentary film, Desire of the Everlasting Hills, was a guest on Catholic Answers Live. Host, Cy Kellett, talked with Paul about living as a Catholic man with same-sex attractions. Paul shared his own story and then replied to caller questions, most of which focused on how to love and support people who experience same-sex attractions, without compromising truth.
On March 14, at 6:00 p.m. EST, Rilene Simpson, who also appeared in the documentary, will be a guest on Catholic Answers Live. Consider listening or watching live so you can participate in the conversation.
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Accompanying Our Children in their Difficulties and Failings
Fr. Blatchford unpacks Pope Francis's recommendations for parents
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Our associate director, Fr. Colin Blatchford was a guest on January 27, Hour 3, episode of The Drew Mariani Show where he elaborated on Pope Francis's January 26 general audience. The Holy Father had spoken with concern for people who are "crushed by the weight of life and can no longer hope or pray." As an example, he mentioned parents who are burdened by the problems of their children, including those children who identify with "different sexual orientations." He encouraged these parents to combine prayer with loving accompaniment of their children in the midst of their difficulties.
Father Blatchford fleshed out Pope Francis's guidance, beginning with stating the primacy of parents fostering their own loving encounter with God so that they can live out that love in truth in their relationship with their children. To accompany one's child who has strayed means to be unflagging in the expression of love for them and to be willing to listen to them and to walk with them in their pain and suffering. That doesn't mean that parents neglect the truth, but that when the time is right for such a conversation, it is done with great love so that it can be received, for "sin cannot compete with love." The show wrapped up with Father responding to listeners' questions about challenging situations with loved ones who identify as LGBTQ+.
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For our Spanish Speaking Members and Friends
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March Newsletter in Spanish
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Clergy Study Day July 27: Save the Date
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Plan to join us for a clergy study day where you will learn about Catholic anthropology, psychology, pastoral care, and preaching in relation to persons who experience same-sex attractions and those who love them. Then consider remaining for our annual conference on July 28–31 for the irreplaceable experience of getting acquainted with our inspiring members.
Clergy Study Day
Wednesday, July 27, 2022
University of St. Mary of the Lake
Mundelein, Illinois
Registration opens May 1
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Truth & Love, an initiative of Courage International, is a multifaceted Catholic resource for anyone seeking the tools to support men and women who experience same-sex attractions.
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Gender Identity Discordance*
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Communicating with Children About Sexual Identity
Equipping the young to withstand the onslaught of gender ideology
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Archdiocese of Milwaukee Issues Gender Theory Document
Provides guidance for Catholic parishes, schools, and organizations
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On January 20 the Archdiocese of Milwaukee published “Catechesis and Policy on Questions Concerning Gender Theory.” When asked by the National Catholic Register, Courage executive director, Father Philip Bochanski said, “The document strikes me as very balanced, written from a perspective of understanding and concern for those involved in the unique pastoral challenge of accompanying members of the faithful who are experiencing gender-identity discordance. … It acknowledges the reality that contemporary secular culture does not share the Church's perspective on what it means to be a human person, without taking a defensive stance on the one hand, or conceding to the culture on the other.”
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While the primary mission of Courage and EnCourage remains supporting people living with the experience of same-sex attractions and those who love them, we thought it could be helpful to our readers to occasionally set aside some space in our newsletter to address this topic.
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We hope to move forward with the in-person events listed on our calendar, while being mindful of the health and wellbeing of our members. Please be aware that, as the situation surrounding the COVID-19 pandemic continues to evolve, we may be required to postpone, cancel, or move these events online. If you have any questions or concerns, you may review our statement, or contact us here. Watch our events calendar for updates.
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EnCourage California Retreat
March 11–13, 2022, in Menlo Park, California
CANCELLED
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A Men's Lenten Retreat: "The Glory of Masculinity: Reclaim Your Manhood"
March 19, 2022, in Reading, Pennsylvania
Event is not hosted by Courage, but by our friends at The Kings Men
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Samson Healing Retreat for Men
April 7–10, 2022, in Hammonton, New Jersey
Event is not hosted by Courage, but by our friends at The Kings Men
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Courage/EnCourage Retreat
April 8–10, 2022, in Birmingham, Alabama
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Living Waters Leadership Training
April 24–29, 2022, in Sierra Madre, California
Equips participants for effective ministry to the sexually and relationally broken.
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Courage Men's Sports Camp XXII
May 26–May 29, 2022, near Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
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Courage Clergy Study Day
July 27, 2022, in Mundelein, Illinois
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Courage and EnCourage Annual Conference
July 28–31, 2022, in Mundelein, Illinois
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Courage does not necessarily fully endorse all of the ideas included in resources that are not produced by Courage, but we still like to share items that we and our members have found to have considerable helpful content.
Photo credits
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