Journeys can be so much fun, exciting, or devastating. Ours was the latter starting December 27, 2019 when I was diagnosed with stage 3 inoperable, pancreatic cancer. Ed and I were unprepared for this event, shocked and had a terribly hard time accepting what had happened to us.
As time has passed, we have come to accept our lives, and our time together as long as that may be. Ecclesiastes 3:2: “there is a time to be born and a time to die” comes to my mind. God is in control of my life, and both Ed and I are at peace and comforted by that fact. We cherish every day, every moment, and every time we are together with each other, family and friends. We have been overwhelmed with prayer, notes, gifts and love that has been shown to us all of the time. Our faith has grown, and we have felt the love of God and His arms wrapped around us every day.
There are so many scriptures that have come alive for us: II Corinthians 4:16&18 “Therefore do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” God, you have all of the power; you can do anything. I humbly and desperately ask for healing. I will ask for this over and over and over again. Then, I will trust in your sovereignty; living by “faith and not by sight.” II Corinthians 5-7
The month of December was a joy, no chemo, no radiation, no MRI, and no CT scan. It all started back on Jan. 4th, and it was not the news that we wanted. We were told that there were 3 spots on my liver that weren't there in September. We were stunned, shocked and are still trying to absorb this turn of events. However, waking the next day, we knew that we had another hard year to face. With that said, we are both very concerned, but we are positive, try to see the good in all things, and stand firmly rooted in our faith. We know that God has the perfect plan for me, and only He knows when my time here on Earth will be over. Until that day, I pray for the strength to get through each day with a strong faith and positive outlook. I know that I will be healed either here on earth or in Heaven. We put our trust in the Lord.
I continue to be thankful for our church, Ed, who is my rock, our family and friends. The support and love and prayers have been incredible. I have two choices, I can choose to wake up, be grateful, positive, and know that God is with us each and every day. I also could choose to hide, deal with depression, and fear of an unknown future. Ed and I have chosen the former. To God be the glory. I close with a verse from the 23rd Psalm: “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for Thy rod and staff comfort me.”
