From Dave Scott :

My wife Sue suffered from Frontotemporal Dementia, known as early onset Dementia, for fifteen years which is double the median life span of seven years. Rev. Nancy was very supportive throughout the last ten years taking Sue to lunch occasionally when she was still able to function in a public situation. Later, as Sue needed exceptional care, Rev. Nancy provided support to me based on her own experience with parental dementia, which was very helpful in providing a deeper understanding of the nature of the illness and finding the strength to deal with it. I visited Sue daily when she was in the nursing home over the last three years and knowing her love of chocolate, I usually had some to leave behind on my visits. 

Sue finally passed in late February 2021 and Rev. Nancy arranged a memorial service on the Saturday before Easter Sunday for Sue. This was extremely kind of Rev. Nancy on what is otherwise the busiest time of her year and appreciated by me and the family. Of course, the service was limited to ten people due to the Covid19 Pandemic, but thanks to Rev. Nancy’s growing use of streaming, we were able to broadcast the service to our family and friends in Bermuda, Canada and the United Kingdom which made it a special day. During my memories of Sue, I noted how she always had a smile when I visited, and I choked up when Rev. Nancy noted that the smile was not only due to my visit but also due to my daily delivery of chocolate, which was a great way to end the remembrance. That memorial service, although not what one normally would expect, will hold very special memories for me and my two sons. So, thank you Rev. Nancy for taking the time to allow us to have it at the Church in the middle of Easter week.

From Dick McCoy :

As a regular funeral service usher, I’ve observed Rev. Nancy show sympathy for those in attendance who are grieving.  Nancy begins each funeral service with the request, “Please stand.”  This sets the tone for the solemn liturgy of the Rite of Funeral.

As we recite the Creed, sing a few hymns, and listen to some remembrances, a quietness settles over the congregation and their attention to the service is one hundred percent.  There is peace and comfort that most sense from Rev. Nancy’s demeanor of God’s peace and love.  

In her homily, Nancy expresses her sadness for those in the pews.  She understands their loss; that they will never see, hear, or touch their loved one again.  But then she typically tells them to share their memories with each other.  She encourages them to seek out each other, meet, and talk about the deceased.  And tell stories about their loved one’s life.  Nancy explains that this will help bring balance in their lives and is a valuable part of healing – not diminishing the loss but focusing on the life that was lived.

From Collis O. Townsend :

“Death is a part of life, but it’s not the fun part.” 

As a society, we don’t talk much about death and dying and the unpleasantness of it all. It is not an easy dinner topic or conversation starter at a cocktail party. Yet, we all experience it at different stages during our lifetime. Sooner or later the Grim Reaper will visit your household! 

Helping people to deal with death is a fundamental aspect of all religions. At Advent, the passion play starts with Nancy and trickles down through the whole organization: the ushers, the Altar Guild, the music, youth programs, stewardship, even the paving of the parking lot, are all part of the process. 

How we engage and treat our elderly parishioners is important to Nancy. When I was Development Warden, she invited me to join her in attending monthly services at Kendal, Crosslands and Jenner’s Pond. She wanted these retirees to know that even though they couldn’t attend regular service they were still part of the church and that the Vestry was available to them. 

When my father died, Weezie moved to Kendal and church remained an important part of her life. She was easily the most spiritual person I have ever known. This may have been because as a child, she was bedridden for three years due to a heart issue. At one point, she asked her mother about the “angels sitting on the end of her bed.” She did not fear death and we discussed the afterlife often. 

Weezie and her sisters used to sing hymns on Sunday. She knew them all by heart. She and I made a point of sitting up front, so she could hear and feel the music. I greatly appreciated the support of friends in the pews ahead and behind who were so helpful with the transitions: standing, sitting, coming and going. The elderly are welcome at Advent! Nancy would come out and serve her the Eucharist in the pew and always make a point of thanking her for coming. It reinforced her personal relationship – Mom mattered! 

As she grew more aged and frailer, my sister and I began making her funeral plans with Nancy. Weezie knew what Lessons and Hymns she wanted. We asked Matt Grieco to play “Lo, How a Rose e’er Blooming” and Leon Spencer sang the Lord’s Prayer, which Mom always loved to hear. Nancy gave a beautiful Sermon, although I must confess I don’t remember much of it. She clearly knew Weezie and made her presence known in the sanctuary. The family was touched in many ways. 

Mom had a great death (odd, but true) and we held the Celebration of Life party at La Verona restaurant. The Wilson Somers Trio played xylophone and we sipped bourbon and watched the Kentucky Derby – after all, Weezie was from Louisville! 

In the days, months and years that followed, Nancy was always there for me. Never prying, always praying and gently offering a guiding hand through this journey called life. I wish her and Ed all the best in this next chapter!