KRISTINA'S WEEKLY EMAIL OF THOUGHT-PROVOKING ESSAYS & VIDEOS TO KEEP YOU CONNECTED TO YOURSELF ON THIS JOURNEY CALLED LIFE |
Greetings!
Whether or not you are parent, the universal, undebatable fact is that we have all been birthed into this world by someone who was able to give us physical life. This is a miraculous ability and anyone who went through such an arduous undertaking should be revered and honored for that alone.
But beyond bringing another human being into existence, there are myriad ways that motherhood can be expressed, with varying results and interactions, good, bad and ugly - and most likely a little bit of everything.
Mother's Day can bring up all sorts of feelings for those who are mothers, those who want to be mothers but who aren't yet or are unable, those who choose not to be mothers or became mothers when they didn't choose to, and then all of us who reflect on the relationship we have/had with our mothers (who may or may not still be around, adding another layer of emotion) and their long term effects and influence on us...Nobody is exempt!
No matter what your experience with your mother, and/or your experience as a mother has been, more often than not your mother was doing the best she could, as she was influenced by her mother who was doing the best she could and so on and so forth. Because as a society, generations have struggled on many different levels, it's mostly been the blind leading the blind, and dysfunction causing more dysfunction, so forgiveness and compassion are always the best remedies if you have suffered in any way.
The good news is that we are at a point where more people than ever have access to a plethora of information, healing modalities and understanding to break any unhealthy patterns and learn how to mother ourselves anew - as well as mother each other and take care of and respect the mother that we inhabit and unceasingly supports our lives, Mother Earth. I hope to inspire you to think about all these themes in this note and PGG essay...
Today's PGG Video of the Week talks about mothering yourself and honoring all the types of mothers in your life and the Instagram post is a fun video of me tapping into my inner child ... Also, I've recently joined Clubhouse, so if any of you are on it, be sure to follow me there @clearlykristina and maybe we can start a room to talk about some of these things - let me know what you think!
Lastly, if you look forward to and benefit from these weekly missives and PGG essays and want to show your gratitude, any donations for my efforts are welcome and appreciated here: Paypal.me/kristinaleonardi. And as always, please feel free to contact me with any comments about anything.
Big hug <3
Kristina
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Mommie Dearest
Originally published March 12, 2013
In that famous scene from the movie about Joan Crawford, the renowned actress declares in a rage to her daughter Christina, “No wire hangers — ever!”
Hopefully you did not grow up with that kind of extreme abusive relationship, but it is not so farfetched to think that as an adult you might be treating yourself like Cinderella’s evil stepmother on steroids from time to time, subtly, overtly or subconsciously beating yourself up about the most trivial or significant things. Until we recognize and do something about it, we are often our own harshest critics when we need to be our most compassionate caregivers.
Do you speak nicely and are kind to yourself, especially in that tape that runs in your head? Do you take care of your body by eating healthy when you’re hungry, dressing appropriately for the weather, getting enough sleep, nursing yourself when sick, exercising, resting and playing on a regular basis? Do you allow yourself to express any emotion you are feeling — anger, sadness, frustration, joy, laughter — in an appropriate and timely manner? (Meaning, don’t walk around emotionally constipated!) And especially if you are a mother of young children, responsible for an aging parent, a teacher, healing professional or assumed the role of ‘official’ caregiver, are you taking care of yourself as much as you take care of others?
Or perhaps on some level you operate like a neglected orphan, walking around searching outside yourself, doing anything for that feeling of warmth and nurturing (or a continuation of it if you did have it as a child). The bottom line is that we can’t rely on someone else — spouse, partner, boyfriend/girlfriends, parents- to provide this for us; as mature adults (which has nothing to do with age) we should strive to be emotionally, physically, financially, and intellectually self-sufficient, and most importantly, loving towards ourselves.
Whether or not you had a positive experience with whoever raised you, learn to nurture yourself as if you were your own precious child. When we are able to mother ourselves, it becomes a lot easier to give and receive love and compassion with those closest to us, and even with strangers. It doesn’t matter if you are ill, out of work, frustrated with a relationship or the state of the world — if we each commit to healing ourselves and take responsibility for our own well-being, we will begin to see positive change around us in big and small ways.
And to all the men out there, gender doesn’t matter — we each have a gentle feminine nature within us that we can call upon and develop, just like we also have a macho warrior spirit!
So tonight when you go to bed, tuck in that little girl or boy within you, maybe drink some tea, read a story and tell yourself you are sublimely cherished and grateful for all that you are, because as Lenny Kravitz's Mama said “Your life is a gift” and “Love’s all that matters.”
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If you like what I write, you'll love what I have to say in person!
If you look forward to and benefit from these weekly essays and want to show your gratitude, any donations for my efforts are welcomed and appreciated here: Paypal.me/kristinaleonardi
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Remember, you can always see PGGs from any month or year going back to 2010 on my website at www.kristinaleonardi.com and visit my social media pages for more inspiration throughout the week! Want to share my PGG? Use my Medium page for friendliest posting version.
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PGG VIDEO PICK OF THE WEEK |
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