Dear TBZ community:
Every holiday when we sing Hallel, the songs and praises from Psalms, I am struck by the blunt transition between what seems to be two separate sections.
זֶה הַיּוֹם עָשָׂה יְהֹוָה. נָגִילָה וְנִשְׂמְחָה בוֹ
This is the day of the Lord, let us exult and rejoice upon it.
And the next section of Hallel:
אָנָּא יְהֹוָה הוֹשִׁיעָה נָּא
אָנָּא יְהֹוָה הוֹשִׁיעָה נָּא
אָנָּא יְהֹוָה הַצְלִיחָה נָּא
אָנָּא יְהֹוָה הַצְלִיחָה נָּא
Please, Lord, save us now; please, Lord, save us now; please, Lord, give us success now!; please, Lord, give us success now!
The first one we often sing in a joyful and celebratory tune and the latter with something more somber.
It is of course, worthy to note, that these are not separate sections, they are a continuum in Psalm 118. One is verse 25 and the other is verse 26.
As we sang on Monday during the service of Shavuot, I stopped and invited the Kahal, the community sitting in the sanctuary, in our first week of services in person, to hold, to consider, those two feelings - the celebration and the pain.
The first part of Hallel rang out truly as a moment of celebration. Finally we have come back together after so long apart -- finally praying, face to face (mask to mask) in our beautiful Sanctuary. Then, as we sang the second verse, the call for salvation, and for success, felt true and achingly real as the situation in Israel and Gaza became more dire, more painful, more hopeless.
Throughout this week I have been holding these two verses closely. I have felt deeply Ze Hayom - Today is the day! Celebration! Joy! And Hoshia Na - Save us. Deliver us. Grant us success.
Let me share with you a bit of those two experiences for me this past week:
Ze Hayom:
As people walked in to shul, on Shabbat and Shavuot, my heart was dancing in joy. Oh, how much I have missed community and prayer with others. For fifteen or more months, I have prayed alone (or, thankfully lately with a co-leader) in our Sanctuary. So many times doing calls and responses, I have imagined the voices and the harmony of the people. So many times I wanted to hear your voices and was so tired of hearing only my own. For too many months, I have pointed to the Torah without reading from it.
And this past weekend (and tomorrow and God willing, going forward) it felt like a day of celebration and a day of joy. Ze hayom, this is the day where I hold the pain of this past year, but also the joy of arriving to this day surrounded by our community. Saying the blessing shehecheyanu, that you kept us alive, v'kiy'manu, that you sustained us, and v'higiyanu laz'man hazeh, that we have arrived to this moment, felt true and real and powerful.
Adonai Hoshia Na:
The joy does not stand alone. For at the very same moment, the people in Israel and Gaza were suffering pain, violence, terror.
When I called my sister and my friends in Israel, I listened as they described fleeing in the middle of the night, night after night, to the bomb shelters as the terrorist Hamas launches rockets into their cities, towns and neighborhoods.
I utter the words Hoshia Na.
Save us. Deliver us. Grant us success.
This past week, I read the news of rising violence between Israelis and Palestineans, of mobs killing and hurting each other.
I cry, I cry and ask for Salvation.
I read about the innocent people in Gaza, especially the children, caught in this terrible and horrible conflict.
I ask for Salvation.
I reluctantly follow social media and the competing narratives of what has caused this latest round of violence and I feel the intense hatred on all sides, oh God, so much hatred.
I say Hoshia Na.
I am horrified by the anti-semitic attacks in Los Angeles and New York, in Chile and in London and many, many other places.
I cry for Salvation.
Hoshia Na.
I cry, Hoshia Na as we hear the voices delegitimizing the existence of Israel.
I cry Hoshia Na, as those in the Jewish community who believe in the possibility of a side-by-side Palestinian and Jewish state, and those who speak out against the Israel government policies and the occupation, are accused of not supporting Israel enough and of being antisemitic.
As many of you know, my mother was killed in an antisemitic, terrorist attack almost twenty-seven years ago. That attack was rooted in this same conflict we are in today. My heart breaks again and again when more people lose their loved ones to war, to hatred and to terrorism. At the same time, it is in times like this that my commitment to build a world of love, compassion, kindness, understanding and dialogue rises up. I am not naive, I know that my commitment to these values will not stop antisemitism and hatred and wars and terrorism. Compassion and love are not an end, but rather call to action.
Although a cease of fire has been reached (and I pray it lasts) we know this doesn’t mean the problem has ended. The current round of violence between Israel and Hamas, as well as in East Jerusalem and in Israeli cities and in the West Bank, has served only to strengthen those who oppose peaceful co-existence between a Jewish State and a Palestinian State. Though it feels that decades of coexistence efforts between Jewish Israelis and Palestinian citizens of Israel have been challenged and though the possibility of a side-by-side Israeli and Palestinian State seems almost impossible right now, and as in our country the discourse around the Israeli and Palestinian conflict has become even more polarized, I continue to be committed to this work and to engage with those who are committed to stand together for peace
Hoshia Na
As I think and pray for God to bring us salvation, I am reminded that God manifests through us, through our own actions. Salvation will come only if we, each of us, commit to the work.
Maybe that is the meaning of Ze Hayom: today is the day, today is the day, in the midst of despair, in the midst of fear, in the midst of anger and helplessness to remind ourselves that God manifests through us and that we are capable of building a better world that allows all people to live in freedom. A world guided by the words of the Prayer for Peace attributed to Rabbi Nahchman of Breslov “We did not come to this world for conflict and strife, nor for hatred, envy, mockery or bloodshed; We came to this world only to know You”.
I am heartbroken and with my broken heart I commit to continue this work.
And I am overjoyed that tomorrow, we will be at shul again in person to celebrate Shabbat (and, of course on Zoom too!).
This week in parshat Nasso, we read the priestly Blessing (Numbers 6:22-27)
יְבָרֶכְךָ֥ יְהוָ֖ה וְיִשְׁמְרֶֽךָ
May Adonai bless you and protect you!
יָאֵ֨ר יְהוָ֧ה ׀ פָּנָ֛יו אֵלֶ֖יךָ וִֽיחֻנֶּֽךָּ
May Adonai deal kindly and graciously with you!
יִשָּׂ֨א יְהוָ֤ה ׀ פָּנָיו֙ אֵלֶ֔יךָ וְיָשֵׂ֥ם לְךָ֖ שָׁלֽוֹם
May Adoina bestow God’s favor upon you and grant you peace!
And that is my blessing for all of us, for each of us, for all human beings.
May this Shabbat bring renewal and blessings to all of you and your loved ones.
May we find strength, courage, and patience, and open our hearts with generosity.
May all those who are ill find healing of spirit
May we have a joyful and restful Shabbat!
Shabbat Shalom,
