Dear First Universalist Friends,
How are you?
Two weeks ago I started some seedlings: leafy greens, spicy greens, cukes, peas, and, of course, sunflowers. Was it a little early? Sure, but spring seemed to have legitimately arrived and it couldn’t hurt to get a some hardy things going, right? Within a few days green shoots were breaking through the soil; their little leaves unfurling and stretching outward a day or two later. Ah! Every year it’s such a thrill.
Then, last week, I went away to Vermont for a reading, writing, and hiking study leave, providing Alexis with instructions for seedling care in my absence. (She’s a reliable plant-sitter.)
When I returned I was excited to see the progress of the seedlings - and whoa, was there progress! They were tall! Quite tall! Reaching high, up, and outward toward the sun! Were they reaching a little too high, though? Stretching a little too long? Some seemed kind of top heavy, some of their stems were taking on kind of a curvy shape. “Hmm,” I remarked, “you seem a little leggy.”
A leggy seedling is a sign that the plant isn’t getting enough of something it needs - usually light - and so it grows upwards in search of sun before its roots and stalk are strong enough to support its weight. The weekend forecast was looking warm and bright, so Friday morning I brought the seedlings outside for a good, daylong dose of nourishing sunshine. By the evening more seeds had popped and the little guys were looking happy. I brought them inside for the chilly night, and then, when the sun rose bright again on Saturday morning, I brought them back out, gave them a good drink of water, and Alexis and I headed off to Reid State Park.
It was windy at the beach. Quite windy.
And it was windy in Brunswick, too. When we got home I checked on the seedlings and most of them had broken. Their stalks upside-down “V”s, dangling in the wind.
“Oh, you weren’t ready.” I sighed out loud. “This was too much.”
While I was on study leave, I had the chance to catch up with a number of friends who I’d fallen out of touch with over the course of the past months. I was both surprised and not surprised when one after another expressed that they were experiencing a strange sadness, a weird emptiness, a dizzying weight in their lives right now. All of them were fully vaccinated, all of them love spring, all of them are ready to move-on from the isolation of the past year - and yet, now that it’s spring and we are steadily moving on, they just didn’t feel good.
I’ve heard this same sentiment echoed by many of you lately, First U, and I want to say, of course you feel this way. It makes sense. A lot just happened to everyone and I’m concerned that the breakneck speed of the American/capitalist desire to “get back to normal” might not give us the chance to process all that we felt - and didn’t feel - this year. Jumping right back into our “normal lives” could be a bit too much wind for our beings that still need some serious strengthening and nourishing this spring.
So my friends, despite all the signs that might be giving you a go ahead to get moving right now, there’s no need to rush things. As you unfurl back into the world, make a point to nourish yourselves along the way: cry, space out, sleep, read, walk, listen to music, eat spring greens, call friends who will accept you as you are, find a sunny spot that’s out of the wind and just sit there. Go out when the conditions seem right, but if it’s too much, don’t force it.
Take your time. It’s spring, but it’s spring in Maine.
Let’s just slow down, feel, grow, and be.
Yours in a promise to eventually tell you an uplifting story about my adventures in gardening, seriously, that’s a promise,
Rev. Hillary
