A Note from Louisa
“Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don’t be afraid.”
~Frederick Buechner
I always imagine this quote by Christian Theologian Frederick Buechner as the first words whispered to a child entering the world.
- Here is the world.
- Beautiful and terrible things will happen.
- Don’t be afraid.
This seems like the closest we might come to an owner’s manual for life.
I wonder how might we relate to our own experience differently if we entered the world expecting both shadow and light, and not personalizing the absence of either?
What if we weren’t constantly scrambling to push our way to the front of the line for all “the good stuff”? If we could accept and welcome the terrible as part of the bargain? Perhaps we would cease to be surprised, or feel victimized, when things don’t go our way.
What might we be capable of if we could remember the words “Don’t be afraid?” Could we stand in the entirety of human experience and let it all happen, without trying to control or manipulate it? Could we seek out all experiences, assigning them equal value as teachers, so that we could truly understand what it is to be human?
The amateur sociologist in me is always reminded of how little training our culture provides in managing disappointment or developing frustration tolerance. Instead, we are taught that we must always win, we must always have “the best”, we must always be surrounded by beauty. It’s as if our welcoming words were:
- Here is the world.
- There is only so much of everything. Do what it takes to get your share.
- Don’t ever fail.
- And… don’t take too many risks, you might get hurt.
However, we fail to see how needed those shadow experiences are for us to develop any character, to establish our values, and engage us in empathy for one another. We forget that failing and making mistakes are the only classroom in which wisdom is taught.
For me, this is the primary role of a mindfulness practice: to help us develop the capacity to face each moment, filled with the unknown, comprised of both beautiful and terrible, and not be afraid.
Taking one breath after the next. Welcoming it all.
Blessings on your journey,
Louisa
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A Fond Farewell from Nanci Nilles, PsyD |
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Four years ago, I moved to Omaha and began my private practice at the Center for Mindful Living. I have enjoyed working with my funny, wise colleagues and meeting the creative, loving people participating in treatment and programming at the Center. So it is bittersweet to write this farewell letter. I will miss the peaceful environment of CML. |
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However, I am excited to move back to the South, this time to a town in Louisiana where I can drive the Ponchatrian bridge and visit New Orleans. I will take fond memories of the CML historical house with lovely people coming and going, working towards a more mindful life. I will keep these memories in my heart always.
Warmly,
Nanci
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We’re so grateful for the time Nanci has spent at CML
and wish her the best of luck in her new Louisiana home.
We’ll miss you!
~CML Practitioners
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Daily Silent Meditation
8:15 - 9:00 am
Monday - Friday Morning
Meeting ID: 899 6440 8784
Passcode: 818114
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Guided Meditation
1:15 - 1:45 pm
Tuesday Afternoon
Meeting ID: 826 1223 4516
Passcode: 058471
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Rejoining the World: Finding Yourself in Familiar New Spaces
An Eight-Week Mindfulness-Based Class
Facilitated by Dr. Louisa Foster
Online Wednesday Evenings 5:30 pm to 7:30 pm
June 9th through July 28th
This eight week class is for those who would like to develop stronger mindfulness and self-compassion skills as we emerge from a year and a half of isolation and disruption to social, familial and cultural norms. You may have noticed that...
- You are finding yourself anxious about returning to a post-pandemic environment, feeling that you’ve forgotten how to behave around people, or worried that social rules may have changed.
- You feel like the world we are reentering is inviting you into new opportunities, but unsure about how to proceed.
- You are experiencing some grief over what was lost, or some anger at a world that has shifted or changed.
- You are longing for a place to catch your breath, reflect, process, and integrate the events of the last year.
Through skill building, contemplative exercises, and supportive community, we'll work to understand the experiences of the past year through the lens of mindfulness and self-compassion, as well as introduce practices to help increase spontaneity, and help anchor us as we move forward.
No prior experience with meditation, self-compassion or contemplative practices is needed. Please come as you are!
Supportive: $380.00 (I’d like to help someone attend)
Standard: $320.00 (I’d like to attend)
Supported: $220.00 (I’d like some help attending)
Register here with a friend by June 4th and you both receive a 25% tuition discount!
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Please do not let finances be a barrier to your participation.
If you require additional support, please contact us.
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Self-Compassion and the Path of Sorrows
An online retreat on kindness and loss
(This retreat has been postponed. Please check back for new dates.)
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Mindfulness Study Group
Facilitated Online by Laura Crosby
First and Third Sunday of the month from 4pm to 6 pm
This month we begin TWO new books!
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Real Change, Mindfulness to Heal Ourselves and the World by Sharon Salzburg
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The Dharma of Poetry, How Poems can Deepen Your Spiritual Practice and Open You to Joy by John Brehm
The Dharma of Poetry was the group’s choice from the survey. It is a rich and deep exploration of poetry as teacher. The author complements this exploration with a collection of poetry-inspired meditations. The poetry, the teachings, and the practices are quite moving.
We will study a selection from this book each session, entering the poems through “embodied mindfulness” practices, in which we invite attention and reflection during guided meditations based on the passages.
This approach will weave more practice and direct experience of mindfulness into our sessions — and perhaps condition our receptivity to our other book(s).
To accompany the poetry, I chose Real Change, a relevant and accessible offering of sage wisdom and mindfulness techniques for our time. As Jack Kornfield puts it, “Inspiring, loving, and empowering. The perfect medicine for these difficult times.” The book is a short 222 pages, including meditations, and I think we will enjoy the healing and change it invites.
Our sessions are freely offered, drop-ins are welcome, and there's no registration necessary. We read together - so no homework! - and discuss each chapter. Books are available from lcrosby@me.com.
Meeting ID: 843 4464 0572
Passcode: 570798
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CML Third Space
Shared Facilitation Online
Second and Fourth Sunday of the month
7:00 pm to 8:00 pm
CML Third Space is a virtual community where we can gather, meet new neighbors and friends, and engage in resiliency building to help us stay connected and grounded through this difficult time.
Please join us on the 2nd and 4th Sunday of the month at 7:00 pm CST for a co-created space where we use mindfulness, connection and play to keep our immune systems strong and robust!
In June, we’ll be discussing “Stillness”. We hope you'll join us!
Meeting ID: 817 7852 5724
Passcode: 212247
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Re-Entry Anxiety
By Nanci Nilles Psy.D.
Lately, I have heard the term “re-entry anxiety.” It is the apprehension some people have as the country moves to a post-pandemic phase. Mental health professionals have found a few themes present in these fears; a fear that a year of lockdown has decreased one’s social skills and a “lurking” fear one may contract or carry COVID19 variants to others. Symptoms of re-entry anxiety may include worrying about social situations, distractibility, and a desire to avoid others.
If you have never struggled with significant anxiety, such experiences are disconcerting and seemingly at odds with the lifting restrictions. If one has an anxiety disorder, re-entry anxiety may exacerbate existing worries. These more intense symptoms can feel like a significant setback.
With its limited interactions with others and the absence of opportunity to travel, the past year resulted in repetitious days and solitary routines. Breaking these patterns, even when doing so is perceived in a positive light, may feel unsettling and cause anxiety. (Daily Briefing 2021.)
So what can we do to help ourselves cope with the re-entry anxiety? The first is to acknowledge the feeling of dread. Fear is difficult to ignore, and pushing away or trying to control it often makes it feel more intense. It is a paradox; by acknowledging anxiety's presence, we can exist with it more peacefully.
We can also recall other changes we have navigated successfully. These memories build our self-confidence and remind us how often facing a challenging time leads to transformation. (Cuncic 2021.)
A practical approach is to set small, consistent goals for re-entry that allow for gradual exposure to anxiety-producing situations. Treating ourselves with self-compassion as we face what makes us uncomfortable is essential. There is no need to compare ourselves to what others are doing. By honoring our own pace, we practice gentleness towards ourselves, which also helps to lessen anxiety. (Dupont 2021.)
And lastly, if coping with re-entry anxiety feels like too much, it is ok to ask for assistance. Help can be increasing your support system, upping self-care, joining a support group, or seeking out treatment. Just know, it is ok to be anxious, and you need not navigate this passage alone.
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STAY CONNECTED
The Center for Mindful Living is a space for healing that hosts independent practitioners and educators coming together to create an Urban Sanctuary in the middle of the city.
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