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Using the Accommodation Conflict Resolution style




In mediation, facilitation and conflict coaching, we work to open up creativity in the conflict resolution process. That's in the upper right corner of the chart above. We help to develop a collaborative process where the result is a new creative problem solving outcome. These are win-win agreements. Conflict is diminished and communication and understanding is increased.

Accommodation is...
We don't always have the time required to do creative conflict resolution. As conflicts arise, our prevalent conflict approach is usually what we use. If you tend toward the accommodation style, located in lower right corner, then that's likely your go-to approach.

Everyone accommodates at times and it's great to be accommodated--life is a give and take and everyone puts the needs of others first at times. For some people, though, accommodation is all they know.

When is accommodation a wise choice?
There are plenty of situations in which accommodation is the best method. For example:

  • Preserving relationships
  • Supporting others
  • Other person in position of authority or power
  • Restore harmony
  • Better to end the dispute and move on
  • Provide customer service

Deciding to accommodate, while having other options from which to choose, can be an empowering choice and can help to resolve conflict.

Accommodating to a fault
Why do people tend to accommodate? As per Dale Eilerman, in his article below: "These traits were probably ingrained during childhood and may be reinforced by family, religious or other values. Individuals who have a tendency to be accommodating prefer the harmony, goodwill and reciprocity that is often associated with this behavior trait and feel that it serves them well most of the time." As well, individuals who are targeted by prejudice or discrimination may develop accommodation as a coping mechanism for survival purposes.

When is accommodation not good?
If accommodation is the only way an individual knows to resolve conflict, it's a problem. If exclusively accommodating, the individual's needs are being subsumed and the other person's needs are being treated as superior. That's not right. Everyone's voice should be heard and ideas should be shared and considered.

If you tend to be the kind of person who only accommodates, the idea is to develop more comfort in asserting your own ideas and interests. It's hard to change old patterns. For someone who is used to going along with other's ideas, this may be difficult. See if you can find a partner and try role playing a conversation where your ideas and opinions are asserted as an equal part of the conversation.

Do this:

  • Read this article about the accommodating conflict style

  • If you tend to be competitive, look for people who tend toward accommodation around you. Try to pull back and encourage their full participation in making decisions and resolving conflicts.