Dear St. John's Community,
I am very happy to share with you a beautiful—and practical— reflection by parishioner L
ivy More. Enjoy!
God's peace,
Rob+
From Livy More:
When I was striking out on my own, my mother gave me a tiny rubber spatula with a long handle. It was, she told me, for getting the last catsup out of the bottle. I managed not to laugh because I understood where my mother was coming from. My parents, born in 1914 and 1917, were shaped by two major occurrences, the Great Depression and World War II. They reached adulthood in a dangerously fragile world, adopting habits of frugality, patience, and self-sacrifice. Throughout their lives, they avoided display and waste, although they were unfailingly generous, loyal, and principled.
It has occurred to me that this pandemic may similarly shape us. Everyone has gone into some sort of survival mode. I can sense in myself the wish to hold tight instead of sharing. Resentment, frustration, impatience, intolerance are all just under the surface, trying to take the controls.
My aunt, who lost her first husband in the war and her second to cancer, told her children, “You can’t control what life throws at you, but you can decide how you are going to deal with it.” Maybe a good practice would be to spend part of each day being mindful of how we want to cope with this challenge. Our gym has been streaming workouts on Facebook, so I try to exercise in the living room, using soup cans as weights and a broomstick for balance. Maybe we need similar “character calisthenics” to find and flex our attitude muscles. These exercises can also be done in the privacy of our homes with whatever we have at hand. As with any workout, start easy and then scale it up.
Practice patience. Plant a garden.
Practice gratitude. Each day, identify something good in your life.
Practice consideration. If King Arthur flour appears at the market, buy one bag and leave the rest for others.
Practice generosity. Donate the price of the concert ticket you bought instead of asking for a refund. The performer needs the money.
Practice tolerance. We’re all stressed, so cut everyone a little extra slack. You can start by ignoring the person in your household who clicks his pen or cracks her knuckles. If you do this well, go on to level two. You have an acquaintance who is truly a good person, but with some sort of annoying mannerism. Call to check in. By the way, cut yourself some slack too.
Practice empathy. Someone you know is having a really tough time. Make the difficult call you have been avoiding.
Minimize cynicism, anger, resentment, and frustration. Turn off NPR and take a walk.
We may bumble through some of our practices, but keep at it. We all have the power to be deliberate about how we want this crisis to shape us and what we want to be like when we come out the other end.
***
Our service from last Sunday is
here
. Experience it again, or share it with your friends.
