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Striving for success without hard work is like trying to harvest where you haven't planted."—David Bly

Self-development takes a lifetime—and that’s okay

When we’re children, our parents, caregivers, and teachers usually set our paths towards personal growth. But when we move out of the house and into the adult world, it’s up to us to set goals. 

Self-development is a lifelong process—but not a linear process. New situations will require new and different skills, and challenges often arise in adult life when you least expect them. But that process of setting personal goals and looking inside yourself is some of life’s most profound and rewarding work. If this process is new to you, that’s okay—start small.


Develop these 6 soft skills

Soft skills are skills that can’t easily be quantified but are still hugely important to personal success, while a hard skill is more technical and quantifiable. If you get a flat tire, for example, a soft skill you might use would be problem-solving, but the hard skill would be changing the tire. 

Here are a few examples of soft skills to develop. These can help you in your friendships, romantic relationships, family life, workplace, and more. Improving these will also help improve your overall quality of life.

  1. Communication: No one can read your mind. Thinking about who needs to know what information and the best way to convey it is an art, and it’s worth it to spend time working on it because there is no relationship in which communication skills won’t be necessary.
  2. Interpersonal skills: If you feel like you might want to develop closer relationships with co-workers or roommates, or make more friends (which can be so hard as an adult), you might want to develop your interpersonal skills—think relating to others, paying attention to nonverbal cues, setting and respecting boundaries, making and keeping social plans, and handling conflict.
  3. Time management: Unfortunately, the day only has 24 hours, and we have to spend some of them sleeping. How will you choose to allocate the remaining time? Effective time management skills and good habits will help ensure your actions match your goals.
  4. Learning mindset: Your education doesn’t stop when you’ve got a diploma or degree in hand. In fact, some might say that’s when your real education begins. How you approach lifelong learning will determine how easily you pick up new habits and what types of activities you’ll engage in. How do you want to approach learning, and how can you find ways to exercise that approach?
  5. Getting outside your comfort zone: Being adventurous is a real skill. If you’re someone who isn’t prone to taking risks but wants to have new experiences, maybe you can set your mind to expanding your horizons a little bit at a time.
  6. Goal-setting: Even the way you want to approach setting and achieving personal goals can be an area for improvement. How will you hold yourself accountable and reach your goals?


5 Self-development strategies

The above list may feel daunting to tackle all at once, so choose an area or two to start with and set tangible goals for yourself to improve your knowledge and skills. 

1. Find a mentor or coach

One-on-one guidance can be highly effective for certain people. What type of one-on-one guidance depends on what you’re looking to improve. 

mentor or coach can be a great choice for improving your interpersonal skills, time management, and goal-setting, or for helping you advance in your chosen career.

2. Read books and listen to podcasts

Reading books is the most cost-effective way to gain perspective other than your own. Some people swear reading novels is all one needs to improve oneself; others tend to opt for self-help and nonfiction books. Self-help books, while once considered embarrassing or stuffy, are having a renaissance—experts from a huge variety of fields and backgrounds have published essay collections, memoirs, and research meant to give readers a chance to reflect on their own lives. Popular modern self-help books include The Defining DecadeHow to Do the WorkTiny Beautiful ThingsDaring Greatly.

There are also many podcasts that dole out advice, tell stories, and offer insight if your learning style is more auditory than visual. 

3. Find peer support

Whether it’s through a formal group like a religious organization, an online community, or just among your friends, it can be helpful to reach out to others who are also on a journey of self-development. Having a support group can help you feel less alone, give you ideas, foster empathy, and make you feel fulfilled when you offer support to others.

4. Care for your body

If you’re the type of person who tends to forget they have a body, losing yourself in conversations, books, games, or other cerebral activities, you might want to work on movementself-care, and nourishment.

5. Keep a journal

One of the best and most time-honored ways of maintaining a running dialogue with oneself is to keep a journal. Some people write for the craft of writing and enjoy it as an art form, while others like to keep a simple log of their thoughts, feelings, activities, and progress toward their development goals. The great thing about a journal is it’s truly a blank slate—you’re the author of your own journey.



No matter what you plan to develop within yourself or how you plan to do it, now is always the right time to begin. Setting and pursuing goals will help you live a more full, satisfying, and meaningful life.

Lack of sleep contributes to an array of health issues such as obesity, high blood pressure, and heart disease. Try these 5 unconventional tips, and you may be able to trick your body into a restful slumber.

1. Immerse your face in cold water

Just when you thought splashing cold water on your face would wake you up, it actually can put you to sleep! Known as the Mammalian Reflex or Response, immersing your face in cold water for 30 seconds will lower your heart rate and narrow your blood vessels, causing reduced blood flow to the limbs and reserving more for the brain and heart. It basically signals your body into a relaxed hibernation mode. The colder the water, the faster the heart rate will slow. Brrrr.

2. Breathe using the 4-7-8 method

The 4-7-8 breathing method by Dr. Andrew Weil, a supporter of holistic and integrative medicine, encourages you to focus on your breath and relaxes you, much like meditation. It is based on Pranayama Yoga breathing techniques, and it’s easy to learn. Dr. Weil suggests sitting up straight and holding your tongue against the roof of your mouth, behind your teeth, while practicing it.

The steps of the 4-7-8 method are:

  1. Inhale through your nose for a 4-second count.
  2. Hold that breath for 7 seconds.
  3. Then, exhale your breath slowly for an 8-second count.
  4. Repeat these steps 2-4 times.

This calming breath technique will have you snoozing in no time at all. Dr. Weil suggests practicing this technique before bedtime for 4-6 weeks to experience its full benefits.

3. Skip the hot shower

You may think that nice hot shower will help you sleep, but exposing yourself to a rise in body temperature disrupts your body’s natural ability to produce melatonin. Melatonin is a naturally occurring hormone that is made by the pineal gland in your brain. It regulates your body’s internal clock. Two hours before your regular bedtime, the melatonin levels in your body rise to aid your body in shutting down for the night. Bright lights and warm temperatures can disrupt your natural melatonin production.

Aim to have that hot shower at least two hours before you plan to hit the sack, giving your body ample time to cool down. An alternative suggestion would be to blast yourself with cold water at the end of your hot shower for that Mammalian Dive Reflex, if you think you can take it.

Other ways to boost your natural melatonin are to get sunshine and exercise during the day and to keep the lights dim and your bedroom cool at night.

4. Write down your thoughts

Journaling right before you go to sleep can ease your fears and anxieties and help you to drift off quicker. Writing about your day’s problems literally gets them off your chest. Writing a nightly gratitude list can help you focus on positive thoughts and make it easier to fall asleep.

Research shows  people who kept a nightly gratitude journal slept longer and had a better quality of sleep. Now that is something for which to be thankful!

5. Tense and relax your toes

While you don’t want to participate in any rigorous exercise before bed, the simple act of tensing up your toes and relaxing them for a count of up to ten can ease the tension from your body and allow you to fall asleep faster.

You can use this progressive muscle relaxation technique throughout your body. Lay down and close your eyes. Begin at your scalp and slowly work your way down, focusing your attention on each section of your body, from your eyelids to your throat, your shoulders down to your fingers, your chest all the way to your knees, and finally, down to your toes. You will find yourself more relaxed and sleepy.

Consider using one of these unconventional sleep hacks to battle another sleepless night. Changing your habits and thoughts or even taking a cold-water douse may prove to help you drift off to a peaceful night’s slumber.



Taking ownership at work can benefit you in several ways. Here are some examples:

  • Provides a constant source of motivation for your work: Taking ownership of your work helps with motivation in your job role, as it empowers you to ask questions, develop ideas and get feedback on your efforts instead of waiting to receive answers from your superiors.
  • Ensures you align your projects or job duties with company goals: When taking ownership of your work, you maintain good communication with your direct superior and ask questions about the reasoning behind new assignments or job tasks. This helps you direct your work activities toward accomplishing company goals.
  • Helps you foster positive workplace relationships: Because work ownership encourages accountability and communication with your superiors, it helps you complete your work while thinking of how it affects others and ensures you speak with your superior to learn more about their expectations.
  • Encourages career growth: Work ownership encourages you to expand your skill set, take on additional responsibilities and pursue new job roles, which can help you take proactive steps in your career.


14 ways to take ownership at work

Here is a list of different strategies you can use to take ownership at work:

1. Remind yourself why you chose your job

Reminding yourself of the goals and career aspirations that led you to apply for and accept a job offer can help you re-motivate yourself about your job duties. This is because you clearly understand your job's purpose in your life and future career. Your ability to remember why you chose your current job also allows you to reevaluate your career goals and develop strategies for achieving those objectives. This could include gaining more experience before considering internal promotions or enhancing your interpersonal skills.


2. Be proactive instead of reactive

Taking ownership of your work requires you to take proactive measures in your daily job duties. This includes anticipating problems and developing solutions, asking for clarification on deadlines or tasks and working ahead to minimize stress or confusion during busy workdays.


3. Practice managing up

Managing up is a process employees can take to get to know their superiors, including their management styles, communication preferences and expectations. It also encourages employees to develop a positive working relationship with their manager. This is a useful way to take ownership at work because it allows you to establish trust with your superiors and pursue opportunities to gain more work experience.


4. Balance expressing your ideas with supporting others' ideas

An important part of taking ownership of your work is expressing your ideas during team meetings or projects. To do this, you need to have confidence in yourself and support your ideas with evidence.

However, as important as it is to express your own thoughts, it's just as important to listen to ideas and input from your team. Company leaders and experienced employees often have innovative ideas that align with company goals. In these situations, taking ownership of your job means acknowledging the ideas of others and when to support them by converting their ideas into actions.


5. Communicate with your employer about your career goals

To take ownership of your work and accomplish your career goals, you need to be honest with your manager about what you want to achieve in your job role, which areas you want to learn more about and the projects or job duties you enjoy most. It also helps you work with your manager to establish performance milestones and determine new tasks that align with your interests.


6. Ask for constructive feedback

Instead of waiting for reviews, ask for constructive feedback regularly as a standard part of your work routine. Asking for constructive feedback from peers and superiors gives you the chance to better understand how you excel in your role as a teammate and employee. It also helps you determine what areas you should improve to contribute to your company more successfully.


7. Practice active listening

Active listening is a method you can use to enhance your communication skills in the workplace and take ownership of your work. It includes non-verbal cues like nodding, smiling, making eye contact, taking notes and positioning your body in certain ways, but it can also involve making small verbal gestures and asking questions.

Through active listening, you can better understand the needs of your employer and your teammates. You also enhance your memory by focusing your attention on the speaker and taking notes. Further, being able to listen actively ensures that you gain clarity about your job tasks so that you can execute them effectively.


8. Offer solutions to problems

When taking ownership of your work, offering solutions is more effective than presenting problems. For example, instead of going straight to your manager with a problem you discovered, take a few minutes to consider how you would solve the problem by yourself. When you visit with them, present the problem and immediately describe a few potential solutions you came up with. This shows initiative on your part and helps your manager maintain awareness of workplace activities.


9. Develop your self-awareness

Self-awareness is how you understand yourself, including your strengths, weaknesses, learning style and personality traits. By having an in-depth understanding of your habits and needs, you can hold yourself accountable, set goals for improvement and adjust the way you work to accommodate your strengths and weaknesses. For example, if you know you have difficulty concentrating for long periods, you can adjust your work style to complete tasks in set time frames followed by short breaks.


10. Ask questions early on

When you start a new project or job assignment, you can take ownership of your work by asking questions early. This helps you determine key objectives your manager wants you to achieve and figure out the purpose of a project or job assignment within your department or the company as a whole.


11. Volunteer for new assignments or team roles

By volunteering to lead presentations, take on additional assignments or switch to a different team role for a project, you have the opportunity to develop your skills and get closer to career milestones. Volunteering yourself for these opportunities helps you take ownership of your work because it forces you to instigate change instead of waiting for someone else to give you new assignments and responsibilities.


12. Take advantage of learning opportunities

A key part of taking ownership at work is motivating yourself to improve your professional knowledge and workplace skills. You can do this by participating in training programs or certification courses.


13. Set professional goals for yourself

Setting professional goals for yourself gives you specific standards to uphold and career milestones to tailor your work efforts toward. This also gives you a sense of empowerment because it helps you challenge yourself as an individual and gives you a sense of control over your professional aspirations.



14. Develop a forward-thinking attitude

When taking ownership of your work, always think about how your current actions and behaviors will influence your coworkers, employer and future career goals. One example of this would be if you considered how your involvement in work activities could affect your future skill level and ability to get promotions.


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INGREDIENTS

  • 1 lb. rotini pasta ($1.25)
  • 1 english cucumber ($1.49)
  • 1 red bell pepper ($1.59)
  • 1 orange bell pepper ($1.59)
  • 10 oz. grape tomatoes ($2.49)
  • 1/2 red onion ($0.37)
  • 2 Tbsp fresh chopped parsley ($0.29)
  • 1/4 cup crumbled feta cheese ($1.83)
  • 16 oz. bottled zesty Italian dressing ($2.50)
  • 1/4 tsp salt ($0.02)
  • 1/4 tsp freshly cracked black pepper($0.02)


INSTRUCTIONS 

  • Cook the pasta according to the package instructions. Drain the pasta in a colander and rinse briefly with cool water to cool off the pasta. Drain well.
  • While the pasta is cooking, prepare the veggies. Slice the cucumber into half moons, chop the bell peppers, slice the tomatoes in half, thinly slice the red onion, and chop the parsley. Set the vegetables and chopped parsley aside.
  • Once the pasta has drained, transfer it to a large bowl. Add the chopped vegetables, chopped parsley and feta cheese.
  • Pour the dressing over the pasta salad. Toss the salad ingredients together until everything is evenly coated in the dressing. Add salt and pepper to taste, I added about ¼ tsp of salt and ¼ tsp ground black pepper. Serve immediately or refrigerate until ready to eat.*


A teacher's vitality or capacity to be vital, present, positive, and deeply engaged and connected to her/his children and students is not a fixed, indelible condition, but a state that ebbs and flows and grows within the context of the teaching life. Stepping Stone School is committed to a program of professional development devoted explicitly to nourishing the inner and external life or core dimensions that are increasingly important for our educators on their journey.
-Rhonda Paver
The Educator Vitality Journey is a program designed to help our teachers to make a daily, conscious effort to be positive, self-aware, passionate, and fully engaged in their roles, while deepening their understanding of their true potential.