A note from the author:
What is clarity?
Clarity exists when one can observe a situation for what is, not what they might subjectively interpret or judge it to be. It’s not a pretty or ugly blue shirt, it’s a blue shirt. It’s not right or wrong, it happened. The putt didn’t go too far or too short, it went 7 feet and 3 inches—neither bad nor good. A complete absence of judgment.
Clarity has no regard for expectations. Hence, there are no unmet expectations. Frustration (and the associated emotional energy drain) is eliminated.
Why do I want it?
When multiple individuals can witness something with clarity, then they have a base point to figure out what happens next and why. When multiple individuals make a judgment on the situation, though, then each has a favored path (affected by history, “what’s in it for me,” ego, rules of life, etc.). Teams whose members develop individual clarity can more quickly and effectively arrive at a mutual agreement on how to proceed.
Then what happens when I’m the only member of the team open to new data and points of view? Or it’s new information only to me? Then how the others are approaching the discussion becomes part of the information in the situation. They “are who they are” perhaps and become part of the conclusion equation. But it’s not impossible to help others open up to looking at the data instead of immediately judging it.
How do I get clarity?
You already have it… when you want it. Most of us believe we can sometimes be open and easy-going and able to see new data and at other times be rigidly opinionated and even argumentative (either actively or passively). And we usually have no idea how or when we wander in or out of those personas. It just happens: We are who we are.
What if we perceived that these two conditions were clearly and discretely embodied in two separate people? I call the first one the
Learner/Researcher (L/R)—the one who’s open to new information and interpretations and is non-judgmental. This person is the more productive participant in a clarity conversation because he or she doesn’t enter with pre-conceived solutions or prejudices.
The other I call the
Knower/Judger (K/J). This person operates on the rules and assumptions learned through years of experiences and lessons. From these experiences the K/J knows what’s right and wrong and how to do a lot of things with which they have history. They can frequently operate on auto-pilot. They can be extremely useful in day-to-day functions yet rigidly obstructive in negotiations or decision-making exercises.
The key to developing clarity is developing the skill to see K/J and L/R in others and ourselves and willfully become the L/R when the situation calls for it.
"There is a clear and present danger.....when you are neither clear nor present."
