May 25, 2022

Dear Lower School Families,

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’” ~ Fred Rogers

As you are aware, there was a terrible act of violence perpetrated in Texas on Tuesday at an elementary school that sadly resulted in the loss of many lives. Events such as these often result in many feelings and questions in both ourselves as adults but also the children we love and care for. We have compiled a list of resources for you and your family to help aid in processing this tragedy. It is important to remember that incidents such as this may elicit a variety of responses, and it is important to be aware that it may happen to you as well as your children. Before speaking with your children, if you deem it appropriate to do so, make certain you set aside time to compose yourself and your thoughts. Children, just like adults, will try to make sense of what has happened and may need your guidance on how to best sort through these feelings. The following things are important to remember.

1. Reassure them they are safe
2. Ask them what they know already
3. Let them ask questions
4. Gently help them sort out fact from fear
5. Be honest (in a developmentally appropriate way)
6. Remember that their attention span and ability to process things is shorter than adults 
7. Give additional opportunities later to check in
8. They are looking to you for cues on how to react and feel

It is not uncommon for children to become a little more dependent or clingy after events like this. They might feel scared or unsure and could gravitate towards you. They also may have scary dreams, and their sleep patterns may become disrupted so it is important to monitor them for signs of poor sleep even if they do not wake you up in the middle of the night. These things may happen for a few days to a few weeks; everyone is different. Additionally, they may become curious and vocal about their wonders about death. This can be shocking and feel challenging to speak to them about but remember that they are learning and curious, and that is healthy and natural.

Please know we are here to be a helpful resource to you and your family. Should you have any specific questions or need additional support, please feel free to reach out to Lower School Counselor Shaun Ditty at dittys@columbusacademy.org or 614-509-2620.

Links:

• Common Sense Media: How to Talk to Kids About School Shootings
• Talking to Children About Violence: Tips for Parents and Teachers
• How to Talk to Kids After 19 Children, 2 Adults Killed in Texas School Shooting
• Talking to Kids About Fear and Violence
• Tips for Survivors: Coping with Grief after Community Violence
• How to Talk to Kids About Tragedies in the Media

Sincerely,

Shaun Ditty

Lower School Counselor

Mark L. Hansen

Head of Lower School