You are receiving Ellie Krug's Monthly Newsletter, The Ripple
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ellie krug
writer, lawyer, human
Human Inspiration Works, LLC
The Ripple
Vol 8 No.1 January 2023
Inspired by the words and deeds of Robert F. Kennedy
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Standing In School Hallways and Classrooms
Dear Friends:
We’re well on our way in 2023! I remember being a young lawyer sitting in my office in Boston in the early 1980s and thinking that the 2020s were so, so far away. And yet, here we are. Ha!
Two weeks ago, I was sworn in as a board member for District 112 Eastern Carver County Schools, and then afterward, I sat for my very first school board meeting. It was a bit surreal, and for sure, at this time last year, I would never have predicted that I’d find myself in such a role. It just goes to show that one never knows where the Universe will take us next.
Well, that’s not entirely true. It turns out that I now know the Universe will also have me standing in school hallways and classrooms.
As a school board member, I’ve been assigned to liaise with a District 112 high school and a K-5 elementary school. I visited that elementary school, Jonathan Elementary, last week and met with Principal Pete, a delightful, enthusiastic human. As we toured the school, we came across first graders walking single file toward the lunchroom. Principal Pete hi-fived, fist-bumped or hugged (it was each student’s choice) almost every one of those children (and he also knew each of their names!). The scene completely melted my heart, and it confirmed that yes, running for school board was exactly what I needed to do!
Also last week, I spoke to several high school classes in a neighboring school district. The topic was about living life authentically and the need to have compassion for oneself and for others. The students were attentive and asked great questions, and the experience buoyed my confidence about the future. We simply need to hold on until our younger people get into positions of power, where finally, our country can consistently go forward in a positive direction.
I’m convinced that every American adult should visit a local school for just an hour to see the magic of wonderful educators and students interacting in real time. I’m positive that doing so would ground and collectively bind us in ways that would heal most of our differences.
I wish you good spirits as we go forward in this new year. Remember, I care about you!
ellie
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Cathy Free of The Washington Post writes about Hody Childress, a Lockheed Martin retiree and farmer in small town Geraldine, Alabama, who one day walked into the local drug store and asked the owner, Brooke Walker, if she had customers who couldn’t afford to pay for their medications. When Walker replied affirmatively, Hody handed her a $100 bill to help pay for the medicine of anyone who couldn’t afford it.
He told Walker, “Don’t tell a soul where the money came from—if they ask, just tell them it’s a blessing from the Lord.”
For years after that, on the first of every month, Hody would revisit Geraldine Drug and drop off another $100 bill. Over time, Hody’s generosity helped many individuals and their families.
Walker, the drug store owner, recounted about a single mom and her daughter whose medication needs weren’t covered by insurance. Walker paid for the medicine with money that Hody had donated. When she handed the woman the meds with a zero balance receipt attached, the mom burst into tears. Walker related, “She (the mom) came back several months later and asked to pay it forward. I believe that Hody sparked that in her heart.”
Hody’s kindness wasn’t just restricted to helping pay for others’ medicines. He was devoted to his first wife who had been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, and when she eventually couldn’t walk, Hody carried her in and out of the places she wanted to go.
And as a farmer, he would travel by tractor to help others get their gardens planted. His daughter Tania Nix also recalled, “Every time he went to the post office, he’d take the postmaster an apple, or some sweet potatoes, squash or okra he’d grown on his farm.”
When Hody died on New Year’s Day at age 80, Walker decided that she would let the community know about Hody’s generosity. That has now prompted people in Geraldine to drop off donations of their own. Walker is calling it the “Hody Childress Fund,” and plans to keep it going as long as the community wants.
For Walker, Hody’s generosity was life changing. “His kindness motivated me to be more of a compassionate person,” she said. “He was just a good old guy who wanted to bless his community and he certainly did. He established a legacy of kindness.”
I’m convinced that a million acts of kindness like Hody’s happen every day—we simply just don’t know about them. Yet, when we hear about that kindness, it sparks us all to want to do better. That, friends, is what it’s all about!
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Inclusivity Tip of the Month
Do DEI Trainings Actually Work?
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A recent New York Times opinion piece, “What if Diversity Trainings Are Doing More Harm Than Good?” by psychologist Jesse Singal, questions whether diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) trainings actually accomplish their goals of making organizations more welcoming and open to diverse individuals. Singal proffers that, in fact, mandatory DEI trainings in particular have the reverse effect by alienating some team members and making things worse, rather than better.
As someone who has presented on DEI in one way or another more than a thousand times, I’ve found that there definitely is a difference between mandatory and voluntary DEI trainings. (Most of the trainings I conduct are voluntary for audience members.) I can count on one hand when I’ve ever experienced pushback—such as heckling—and on each of those occasions, it was a mandatory training.
As a result, I now approach mandatory trainings by beginning with an acknowledgement that some in the room might not be happy about having to sit through my presentation. I then ask, “Who here has a child or a grandchild?” After often seeing many hands go up, I will say, “While you might not be thrilled to be here, what we’re going to cover this morning is important to that child or grandchild in your life; in fact, they’ve already learned about this stuff in school. Wouldn’t you like to be prepared for when the kid in your life brings home someone ‘different’ for you to meet? That’s what we’ll cover today.”
While I don’t get every recalcitrant audience member on board with that short speech, I certainly get some.
Additionally, I do agree with Singal that DEI trainings can be disruptive for some organizations. My response is that often, disruption and bumpiness actually are what’s needed to wake up culture leaders to the hours and hours of hard work that must follow a DEI training. Unfortunately, all too often, culture leaders simply aren’t willing to do that hard work. Trust me, I've come across many such culture leaders.
I suspect that like with so many other things that make people feel uncomfortable, we will continue to see pushback against DEI trainings and concepts. In that regard, Singal’s piece may be a harbinger of more things to come. I certainly hope that’s not the case, but only time will tell.
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One’s compassion for another human often involves taking personal risks, and thus, here is a story about Luke Zimmer, who before Christmas stopped on a central Minneapolis interstate to help a motorist who had lost control during a snowstorm. Unfortunately, a hit and run driver then struck Luke, fracturing his spine in several places. Please consider this GoFundMe that’s been set up for Luke, who lacked health insurance. See also this video (date unknown) of a hair stylist’s compassion for a client who was battling a cancer diagnosis—wow, compassion in real time! Finally, here’s a wonderful story of how an adoptive family decided to keep their son’s birth mother involved in his life. | | |
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Here is a story about Bruce’s Beach near Los Angeles—a three-acre waterfront property which the City of Manhattan Beach seized from a black family in 1924. California legislators worked to return the property to the family, which in turn, sold the property back to the state for $20 million. This has spurred a movement for other black families to reclaim land wrongfully taken. See also this Star Tribune story about how the disparity between white and black family incomes is narrowing in MN--finally. Lastly, check out my upcoming events on my website—and if you’re part of a church or nonprofit, reach out; I’d love to present pro bono in February-March, my slow time. | | |
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Last month, I wrote about how Texas is seeking data on the number of transgender persons in the state; now Florida has gotten into the act by mandating that state university hospitals disclose information about the transgender people they treat. (See story here.) That’s in addition to Florida banning a high school African American AP studies course as having no educational value—unbelievable! The new year also kicks off the legislative season in most states and as this The 19th piece relates, that means dozens of bills targeting LGBTQ+ humans, particularly transgender folks. New this season is Oklahoma’s proposal to prevent anyone younger than 26 years of age—someone well past the age of majority—from receiving gender affirming care. Thus, it’s no longer about “protecting kids” and instead it’s clear that OK wants to simply erase trans humans from society. | | |
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The trail camera in the Voyageurs National Park in northern MN yet again shows us wolves at play in the snow. There’s also a fantastic Voyageurs FB page for its trail cam. Wonderful! Also, see this video of a cardinal eating from a gloved hand. Finally, check out this live camera of golden retriever pups who will become service dogs. Try not to get addicted to watching! | | |
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I recently met Lehman Riley, the author of The Adventures of Papa Lemon's Little Wanderers book series for elementary school students. There’s something magnetic about Lehman, and I urge you to check out his website and books—which teach important lessons around bullying, depression, and handling grief. (I also interviewed Leman for my radio show—click here for that interview.) See also this story about how an airline ticketing agent used her intuition to save two teen women from human trafficking. And are you aware of the Obama Foundation’s Emerging Leaders USA program? Humans ages 24-45 can apply for a six-month mentoring program—see here (the deadline is Feb. 3). I’ll finish with this incredible NYT piece about self-compassion with Yale transgender swimmer, Iszac Henig, who speaks about the need to live authentically regardless of the cost.
Lastly, several of you have recently donated to Human Ripple Works, Inc., the nonprofit which makes it possible for me to do more work for organizations that lack budgets for training (like talking to Gender and Sexuality Alliances at various schools across the country). Thank you for that! If you’d like to support this work, please click here on the HRW website. Thanks!
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Finally....
The Ripple is a work in progress, so please, I welcome your suggestions and comments! Please share this newsletter with others, too!
Please consider reading my book, Getting to Ellen: A Memoir about Love, Honesty and Gender Change; if possible, order it through your local bookstore. And, if your book club reads my book, I'm happy to come for the discussion via Zoom!
Thank you for helping to make the world a better place! I'm at your side, cheering you on, I promise! Please have compassion for yourself and for others.
ellie
Encouraging Open Hearts and Thriving Human Spirits
Human Inspiration Works, LLC: We make "inclusion" an action word
elliejkrug@gmail.com
www.elliekrug.com
www.humaninspirationworks.com
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Ellen (Ellie) Krug
319-360-1692
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