I've been thinking about death lately.

Dia de Los Muertos is a tradition I fell in love with when I lived in Mexico.

Growing up in the USA, death was not something we talked about.

There is often shame, shadow and denial around death and dying here.

Thankfully, this is changing as we see the inevitable sacred passage it is.

Years ago I attended a 5 day retreat at the Simonton Cancer Center as a support person for an elderly American woman I met in Mexico. She was diagnosed with stage 4 Cancer and her adult children didn't want to attend.

It was a deeply moving experience -both the retreat and supporting my friend (Sadly, she passed away about 10 months after the retreat).

As part of it, we got to imagine and plan our own death and funeral.

This was a touching and liberating experience.

I've also attended Death Cafes which are interesting and expansive.

Recently, I created my Will, Living Will, and 'death file' - a file with all my important papers - car title, passport, passwords, etc.

I don't want my family to experience added stress around my death.

And, I am not stressed about it either.

Living in Mexico, I made peace with death, my own and others.

Of course I miss loved ones when they cross over to the other side.

But I know this earth school is a temporary stop along our forever journey.

I have learned to commune with loved ones wherever they are.

Our relationships live on inside of us, if we choose this.

We are all in this life, and eventual death of the body, together.

I trust that the Soul lives on in its eternal nature, Loving.

In the spirit of this topic, I wrote this:

When I Die...

It won’t matter how much money I made, what cars I drove, the name

brands I wore, or how many square feet my home was.

It won’t matter whether my career was as an organizer,

a teacher, a life coach, a waitress, or a nanny. 

It won't matter the 'deals' I found or how much I saved or spent.

All of the treasures I collected along the way will be dust.

It won't matter that I had a smoking hot body,

the perfect hair, or that I was 40 pounds overweight.

When I Die...

What will matter is

How I lived and how I loved.

What I learned and how I grew.

How I served and how others felt with me.

How I tended to and expressed my own pure heart.

How I chose to spend my precious time and energy here.

Was I an active participant?

Was I fully engaged with Presence?

Was I leading from my Heart and Soul?

Was I kind, considerate and compassionate?

Was I willing to courageously face challenges?

Was I able to see and accept life with grace and wonder?

And when I got stuck... was I willing to learn and grow

into better ways of being, loving, sharing and caring?

When death comes for you...

Will you be ready?

Have you....

Appreciated enough sunsets? 

Been kissed enough by the Beloved?

Tasted and savored all the scrumptious fruits?

Traveled to charming villages near and far?

Have you...

Sat with the broken-hearted?

Drank in the kindness of strangers?

Listened to the beautiful symphonies?

Danced with delight in flourishing gardens?

Have you...

Made peace with all parts of you?

Forgiven yourself for your judgments?

Shared your Truth bravely and honestly?

Opened your heart to yourself and others?

If not, don't worry my dear...

There is still time.

YOU ARE ALIVE!

Be and share the Love you are.

There are infinite opportunities here.

The time is NOW!

In Loving,

Teri Jo

Fear of death is ridiculous, because as long as you are not dead you are alive, and when you are dead there is nothing more to worry about!

~ Paramahansa Yogananda

I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before

I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.

~ Mark Twain

TED Talk: More to Dying than Meets the Eye (12 minutes)

The death of anyone close to us is always a form of salutation, a simultaneous good-bye to their physical presence and a deep hello to a more intimate imaginal relationship now beginning to form in their absence.

~ David Whyte

TED Talk: Let's Talk About Dying (13 minutes)

To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.

~ J.K. Rowling

The ORGANIZED Corner (NEW)

This is where I share about my Home Organizing business - a tip or trick,

a client story, a win or struggle as a soulo business owner.

NEWS: A Facebook Group I am in asked us to share pictures of our most organized space in our home. Below are a few favorite spots in my home.

Got clutter? Paper piles? An overflowing inbox? Not enough time?

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terijowheeler.com

After all, we brought nothing with us when we came into the world,

and we can’t take anything with us when we leave it.

~ 1 Timothy 6:7

Meet my favorite contemporary poet, David Whyte. You can learn more about him and his work here. I first learned of David's work in the BEST SCHOOL EVER, USM back in 2002. The founders of the University would play excerpts of his poetry for us in class. I was in my early 30's at the time and in all honesty, I thought it was weird. He would recite these poems slowly and he repeated lines again and again.

Thankfully, over time my heart opened to the depth and richness of his heartfelt expression. I recently took one of his online poetry courses and loved it. I also got to see him live this past Saturday in Santa Monica (about 3 hours from where I live in Palm Desert). It was Divine! Listening to his expression is a sacred experience. I had a hard time choosing a poem to share because so many of his writings speak to me.

Here is one called 'Admit' for you:

Admit,

your distant love affair

is with yourself,

and that

no one can play

harder to get;

the unwritten letters,

the play for time,

the heartbreak over

never being properly answered.

That coy look

of false seduction in the mirror,

or that hard look

to hide

what should not

be hidden.

The invitation

to undoing,

and to allowing

yourself to want at last

what you feel

you never deserved,

the fervent wish

to come closer,

and the loving

word

of understanding

you say to yourself

when you finally admit

to it all

the only declaration

that counts.

The antidote to exhaustion isn't rest, it's wholeheartedness.

~ David Whyte

Movie Rec: Astral City: A Spiritual Journey

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want

to die to get there. And yet, death is the destination we all share.

No one has ever escaped it, and that is how it should be, because death

is very likely the single best invention of life. It’s life’s change agent.

It clears out the old to make way for the new.  

~ Steve Jobs

Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely.

~ Buddha

SONG: 'I lived' by One Republic

Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of your aloneness

to learn anything or anyone that does not bring you alive

is too small for you.

~ David Whyte