CRSL Newsletter
December 10, 2020
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Remembering and Repairing |
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Establishing New Traditions
and Practices
Dear Friends,
Eight months into the pandemic, we are doing a lot of wondering and waiting. *Lately many of you have been doing a lot of deciding—about whether to come back to campus, where to live, how to arrange your lives with respect to your physical and emotional well being and that of your loved ones. We all know having choices is a gift, but that doesn’t make it easy.
In recent weeks however, I have found that I have also been doing a lot of remembering. The usual cues, for example, a return to a physical space to signify the beginning of something, have been harder to come by, and much of the past eight months were kind of a blur for quite some time.
But perhaps because it is a holiday season, I have found myself now looking back--to March, when we left campus, to late spring, when it looked as though remote learning would continue through the summer, and the fall, when many of us were on edge about the election, and still reeling from the violence, the revelations, and the resistance, of the summer.
For me, the end of the year, the short days and the scant light, has elicited a reflectiveness about what has transpired over the past months. As you prepare for a new semester perhaps this is the case for you too.
Though we are still in the midst of it, remembering the various stages of the pandemic has been helpful to me, for it is only when we can begin to tell a story about something that we can grapple with and understand it, and eventually learn from it and move on. We often don’t remember things because they are too painful--but when we have a safe environment in which to do so, it helps us heal.
As you read this, I wonder—what are your recollections of the last almost year of your life, and what understandings about yourself, and life, might be emerging? Or do you, as I did for so long, feel like you’re in a dream, which for some is strange and disorienting, but for others has been a nightmare?
I think the more we continue to remember—journal, chronicle on social media, talk with others, watch Netflix shows that highlight our common predicament, make time for remote chats with friends even when we have zoom fatigue, the more we can form narratives, it will help us make meaning of this time in our life.
History is after all a story—the history of Smith, and the country, and in this world. From the mud of the political landscape of the last several years and the violence and evil it has made more overt, has emerged a lotus of radical change. But this has required and will continue to require, remembering. Remembering our experiences of racism; and for those of us who are white, remembering our first realization of our whiteness; turning to more truthful accounts of history than some of us had in our elementary school educations.
Remembering—committing ourselves to revisiting the whole picture of our past experiences—takes courage. But it is the road to repair. For a long while I hovered in the “waiting for it to be over” phase. I have recently begun to realize, though, the only way out is through. My memories of COVID so far bring up fear, denial, and disappointment. But when I face these feelings, I feel more whole than when I pretended they weren’t there. In order to remember a time, you have to acknowledge that it has really happened.
We are all trying to heal: as a world, as a county, as a community. Literally and figuratively, and in some cases, both. Whenever I have the honor to conduct a memorial service for someone who has died I always say we will “re-member” the person, for if you break the word down, it means to put back together.
AS 2021 approaches, let’s take inspiration from this poem, “ We Are Not All in the Same Boat…” and support one another. We are all in the same storm, and we can help one another navigate it, even if we are in different boats.
Be well. I look forward to being together in 2021, even if it’s in a zoom room.
With warmth and blessings,
Matilda and the CRSL staff
Matilda is CRSL's Director of Religious and Spiritual Life and College Chaplain.
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Excerpts from WE are Not
in the Same Boat…
We are not all in the same boat. We are all in the same storm. Some are on super-yachts.
Some have just the one oar.
I heard that we are in the same boat.
But it’s not like that.
We are in the same storm, but not in the same boat.
Your ship can be shipwrecked and mine might not be.
Some have experienced the near-death of the virus, some have already lost someone from it, some are not sure their loved ones are going to make it, and some don’t even believe this is a big deal.
Some of us who are well now may end up experiencing it, and some believe they are infallible and will be blown away if or when this hits someone they know
Some have faith in God and expect miracles...
Others say the worse is yet to come.
So, friends, we are not in the same boat.
We are going through a time when our perceptions and needs are completely different.
And each one will emerge, in his own way, from that storm.
Some with a tan from their pool. Others with scars on the soul (for invisible reasons).
It is very important to see beyond what is seen at first glance. Not just looking, more than looking, seeing...
We are on different ships looking to survive.
Let everyone navigate their route with respect, empathy and responsibility.
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The Place Where We Are Right
by Yehuda Amichai
From the place where we are right
Flowers will never grow
In the spring.
The place where we are right
Is hard and trampled
Like a yard.
But doubts and loves
Dig up the world
Like a mole, a plow.
And a whisper will be heard in the place
Where the ruined
House once stood.
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In a time that has been so divisive, when friendships and family relationships have been torn apart by differences in perspective about social issues, this poem speaks strongly to me about how we hold and express our convictions. Read more here.
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Reflection on Cromwell Day
by Kim Alston
I’m reading a book that I find interesting on the subject of race. It’s called Racecraft: The Soul of Inequality in American Life, written by scholar educators Karen E. Fields and Barbara J. Fields. As the title suggests race or “racecraft” has been a fraudulent social construct used against people of color just as witchcraft was used against women. In one section of the book, it points out the relationship of racism and classism. “From very early on, Americans wove racist concepts into a public language about inequality that made “black” the virtual equivalent of “poor” and lower class, thus creating a distinctive idiom that has no parallel in other Western democracies.” Racism in America continues to play out in physically, socially, emotionally, and economically catastrophic ways for Blacks.
As I reflect on Cromwell Day, I ask myself if we moved any closer to peeling back the onion to closely examine our own manifestations of justice or injustice? Were we able to collectively identify practices, systems or processes that should be changed, named, corrected, or duplicated right here on our campus? Did we learn from the legacy of our she heroes, Otelia and Adelaide Cromwell, both of whom paved the way for future generations through their scholarship and influence on the thinking of those following them? Read more here. Kim is CRSL's Muslim Student Adviser.
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The story tells us that this is all it takes for love to be born:
you listen to the voice of improbable angels
you dare to believe you might have a part to play in their story
you say yes to the idea of the impossible
you give up the future you thought was inevitable
you defy the protocols and social mores of the day when they get in the way of what you know is true
you dare to say to those who would deny your value and your role
that you just might have what’s needed, in this moment
you search for your allies and trust them with your dream
you devour the moments of joy when they come
you demand truth from yourself and those around you
you give up the things you are comfortable with
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Memory and History
By Rhonda Shapiro-Rieser
Memory and Historiography--the writing of history--are two forces that stand in opposition for the heart and soul of a people. Of the two, memory has much more power than history. I learned this from a small book I read in the eighties as a feminist. The book is called Zachor, by Y.H. Yerushalmi. Zachor is the Hebrew command form: Remember! Yerushalmi tells us that the word in various declensions occurs over 160 times in the Bible. I read that book and my eyes were opened. Enlightenment.
I understood, finally, why women could hold factory jobs and even be “foremen” during WWII and yet be confined to the “housewife” role as soon as the war ended. I understood how women could be incredible and daring pilots during that war and as soon as the war ended, the idea of a woman pilot became laughable. I understand now how black women could be the preeminent mathematicians who drove the space program yet have the doors to academic math programs closed to them. Read more here. Rhonda is CRSL's Jewish Student Adviser.
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Sundays, Dec. 13, 11:30 a.m. & Dec. 20, 6:30 p.m.
Join Chaplain Matilda Rose Cantwell for a service of reflection, meditation, and finding joy in this season of darkness and anticipation, at the close of a year of hardship and isolation. Sundays Dec. 13 at 11:30 a.m., and Dec. 20 at 6:30 pm. This week's theme will be peace, and the reflection will be offered by Crys Arellano-Fryer ’09, Res Life Area Director. We will also explore the theme of "Blue Christmas" and how to navigate the seasonal "blues." Come for one or both services. Christian, Christian curious, multifaith or no faith, all are welcome!
After registering, you will receive a confirmation email containing information about joining the meeting.
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Sunday, Dec. 13, 4:30 p.m.
An annual tradition at Smith, Christmas Vespers this year will be broadcast via Smith College's Facebook page and YouTube as we celebrate the season through a service of songs, hymns, and readings. Christmas Vespers tells the story of advent, which means “arrival,” and represents the journeys from darkness to light and captivity to liberation in Christianity, Paganism and other traditions.
In these times of fear and uncertainty when we cannot gather in person, we will come together in spirit to explore what the biblical Christmas story says to us today through words and music. The Smith College Glee Club, Chamber Singers, Orchestra, and Campus School Chorus perform seasonal favorites and works by B.E. Boykin and Mary Lynn Lightfoot. College Chaplain Matilda Rose Cantwell leads the liturgy, with readings by members of the senior class and the Smith College Community. Please join us on Sunday, Dec. 13 at 4:30 p.m. for the premier of this festive event. https://www.facebook.com/smithcollege/
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Poetry Reflection
with Rowan Van Ness,
CRSL Seminary Intern
Mon., Dec. 14, 4:15 - 5:00 pm
Wed., Dec. 16, 11:15 am - 12:00 pm
As part of Stress Free Finals Week Rowan will lead a modified lectio divina process, inviting students to take some time to focus on a single poem and to explore how it connects to your lives. All are welcome! The poem for session one will be "Fire" by Judy Brown and the poem for session two will be "Telling" by Laura Hershey, a poem featured in our last edition. Click here for an engaging talk Judy gives that explores the benefits of asking great questions and opening up possibilities. The presentation ends with her poem "Fire." To register for the meditations email rvanness@smith.edu.
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Centering Amidst Stress to Find Greater Clarity with Anna Ostow,
CRSL Seminary Intern
Tues., Dec. 15, 2:30 - 3:00 pm
During this 30 minute period we will open with an opportunity to check - in about how participants are doing during the finals period. Following check - ins there will be a 10 minute centering practice. The practice uses body awareness and sensation to ground in the present moment, and gives space to reflect on what we are passionate/longing/committed to in our life. We will close with final reflections. This program is offered for Stress Free Finals week. Register in advance at:
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We all have work to do.
Our work is in the light. We have no perfect moral ground to stand on, shaped as we are by this toxic complex time. We may not have time, or emotional capacity, to walk each path together. We are all flailing in the unknown at the moment, terrified, stretched beyond ourselves, ashamed, realizing the future is in our hands....
We must all do our work. Be accountable and go heal, simultaneously, continuously. It’s never too late..
We will not cancel us. If we give up this strategy, we will learn together the other strategies that will ultimately help us break these cycles, liberate future generations from the burden of our shared and private pain, leaving nothing unspeakable in our bones, no shame in our dirt.
Each of us is precious. We, together, must break every cycle that makes us forget this.
-adrienne maree brown
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Graduating During a Pandemic: A Program for Seniors
Transitions can be a time of reflection. Who am I? Who do I want to be? What do I care about? How much money do I need to earn? Where do I want to live? What does it mean to do a particular kind of job? Graduating during a pandemic complicates all of these questions, especially as many of you have recently made decisions whether or not to come back to campus for your final semester. Gather together with fellow seniors and seminary intern and Smith alum Rowan Van Ness ‘08 to explore questions of meaning, identity, hope, and belonging as you get ready for graduation.
Drop in for any/all sessions: Tuesdays, January 12, 19, and 26, 7-8 pm Eastern
(The zoom Link is forthcoming. Pease email rvanness@smith.edu with questions or to express interest.)
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A Blessing For One Who is Exhausted
When the rhythm of the heart becomes hectic,
Time takes on the strain until it breaks;
Then all the unattended stress falls in
On the mind like an endless, increasing weight,
The light in the mind becomes dim.
Things you could take in your stride before
Now become laboursome events of will.
Weariness invades your spirit.
Gravity begins falling inside you,
Dragging down every bone.
The tide you never valued has gone out.
And you are marooned on unsure ground.
Something within you has closed down;
And you cannot push yourself back to life.
You have been forced to enter empty time.
The desire that drove you has relinquished.
There is nothing else to do now but rest
And patiently learn to receive the self
You have forsaken for the race of days.
At first your thinking will darken
And sadness take over like listless weather.
The flow of unwept tears will frighten you.
You have travelled too fast over false ground;
Now your soul has come to take you back.
Take refuge in your senses, open up
To all the small miracles you rushed through.
Become inclined to watch the way of rain
When it falls slow and free.
Imitate the habit of twilight,
Taking time to open the well of colour
That fostered the brightness of day.
Draw alongside the silence of stone
Until its calmness can claim you.
Be excessively gentle with yourself.
Stay clear of those vexed in spirit.
Learn to linger around someone of ease
Who feels they have all the time in the world.
Gradually, you will return to yourself,
Having learned a new respect for your heart
And the joy that dwells far within slow time
-John O'Donohue
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What if Instead of Calling
People Out, We Called Them In?
Have you been "called out?" Have you "called someone out?" What about calling in? Check out Prof. Loretta Ross's article in the New York Times on educating people about cancel culture.
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“In today’s America, we tend to think of healing as something binary: either we’re broken or we’re healed from that brokenness. But that’s not how healing operates, and it’s almost never how human growth works. More often, healing and growth take place on a continuum, with innumerable points between utter brokenness and total health. If this book moves you even a step or two in the direction of healing, it will make an important difference.”
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Al-Nur Prayer Lunch Meeting
Friday, December 18, 12:15 - 1:00 p.m.
We invite you to join us for a spiritual discussion, communal prayer, relationship-building and some fun activities. Bring your lunch, a snack or something to munch on or drink. Offered on rotating Fridays by the Center for Religious and Spiritual Life. All are welcome! To register, go to: https://smith.zoom.us/meeting/register/tJIrfuGorTwuHtCEHIQ9_eIk6Lqoi5Zj7RgW For audio or questions, contact Kim Alston, Muslim Student Adviser at kalston@smith.edu.
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Virtual SCJC Shabbat
Rotating Fridays at 5:00 pm
The Smith College Jewish Community (SCJC) welcomes Shabbat every other Friday with singing songs and psalms to welcome the Sabbath. All students are welcome. Contact Sarah Biskowitz (sbiskowitz@smith.edu) or Lara Brown (lbbrown@smith.edu) for Zoom registration.
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Mindful Mondays, December 14, 12:00 p.m.
Finding Our Breath: Mindfulness Practice and Conversation with a Commitment to Compassion and Hope. A forum for light meditation instruction, sharing and building compassionate communities in times of uncertainty, isolation, and heightened revelation of the deep racial and social disparities that are part of the air we breathe in American society.
no one is free until we are all free. - Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King
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Psalm 23 Remix
The Lord is my DJ; I shall trust that
Love will provide.
You make me pay attention to wind chimes:
You lead me to noiseless fields.
You restore my life force.
You lead me be discerning, for your
name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the darkness
of a fallow well,
I will fear no fascism, for you are with
me;
Your guidance eases me.
You prepare a cheese board before me in
the presence of my darkest thoughts.
You take my hand; my cup runs over.
Surely love and justice will follow me
all the days of my life:
and I will dwell in Your homestead for
ever. Amen. - Christie Towers
Christie Towers is a poet living in the Boston area. She holds an MFA from the University of Massachusetts, Boston, and is currently pursuing her M.Div. at Boston University. She is on the pastoral care team with MANNA (Many Angels Needed Now and Always), a ministry for unhoused and unstably housed folks at St. Paul's Cathedral, Boston.
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Center for Religious and Spiritual Life
Helen Hills Hills Chapel
123-125 Elm Street
Northampton, Massachusetts 01063
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