"The general public has generally never heard of attachment, so they aren't likely to understand a poorly attached child." -belong-blog.com
August 7, 2019
Forty-ninth Edition
Greetings!

Continuing from last month's newsletter, I'm sharing part of Chapter 7 this month from "What Are They Doing?".

This chapter covers the loving, nurturing, and bonding side of therapeutic parenting; all of the fun, exciting, and silly things parents do to bonding with their child and create a heart-to-heart connection.

Because these special times are usually done when the family is home and/or the parent & child are alone together, outsiders rarely get to see this part of therapeutic parenting, leaving them with a lopsided opinion that this parenting method is "harsh" and "no fun".

The following excerpts explain some of the fun, loving ways that parents use on a daily basis to heal their children.

Enjoy!

With love,
P.S. If you haven't already ordered your copy, click HERE !
Chapter 7.
What People Don't See
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Snuggle Time (pg. 72)
Snuggle time is a special time that a parent spends one-on-one with their child each day. Parents hold their child heart-to-heart and rock them while telling silly stories, playing games such as Peek-a-Boo or Ittsy Bittsy Spider, singing, or telling them about special times when they were little or first came home.

Sweet milk sugar (lactose) such as ice cream, pudding, or caramels are sometimes fed to the child by the parent as a form of bonding, recreating the sweet milk an infant would receive from its mother.

It is a time of very special nurturing for the child; they learn to relax in their parent’s arms and find that it is OK to let them get close.
Playtime (pg. 74)
Children need playtime every day. Parents give their child the opportunity each day to play a quiet activity on their own to help build imagination and self-control.

Parents also spend time each day playing with their child to build a heart-to-heart connection with them.

Some of the fun playtime interactions parents will do include singing action songs, dancing to silly tunes, blowing bubbles, playing hand clap-ping games, basketball, or hopscotch. The sky is the limit!
Positive Excitement (pg. 74)
When a child’s chaos metre is continually set on ‘high’ due to trauma in their early years, they will create an environment that is comfortable for this brain-state. If there isn’t enough excitement to keep the metre on ‘high’ they will create chaos to bring it back up to their comfort zone.

Loving parents provide their child with positive excitement every day in order to reset the brain to crave positive excitement rather than negative excitement (chaos).

This can be done in many creative and imaginative ways. Spontaneous touch, parent-child playtime, dance parties, etc. keep the child on their toes and in a state of positive excitement.
Family Time (pg. 75; excerpt from this section)
Children who have been institutionalized (orphanage, group home, residential treatment centre), in a never-ending round of foster homes, or in a neglectful/abusive birth family, don’t know what being part of a real family is supposed to be like.

Therapeutic parents take the time to teach their child family life by working and playing together, eating meals together, and being considerate of other each other.

Family time is working side-by-side, parent and child, to teach life skills and cooperation; weeding the garden, washing windows, doing laundry.
Family time is playing together, learning to share, take turns, and enjoy time with others; playing ball, going swimming, playing on the swing set, going for a walk.
...more...
Laughter (pg. 76)
“…Laughter is scientifically proven to benefit mental health.
Laughing releases endorphins, the body’s “feel good” chemicals. Therefore, it provides short-term relief from tension and worry. Moreover, laughing reduces stress and strengthens social connections.
As a result, one of the many benefits of laughter and humor is the power to combat anxiety and depression, according to researchers. Therefore, laughter is good medicine for mental health.
“Laughter has a way of instantly connecting people and is one of the most basic and fundamental ways in which we communicate as human beings. But more than that—laughter can increase confidence, self-esteem, creativity, positivity and resilience, bringing positive changes to all aspects of our lives.”” -“Laughter consultant” Joe Bluett
(The above is taken with permission from www.newportacademy.com)

Therapeutic parenting is all about having fun with your child and your parenting style amidst, and in spite of, all the chaos and negative behaviours.
Parents that are playful, silly, and relaxed are the ones a child will want to attach to and spend time with!

Laughter really is the best medicine.
Have you ever seen parents using therapeutic parenting techniques and thought, “What are they doing?”

This book dives into the what, why, and how of therapeutic parenting. Learn about the reasons behind the interventions that are used and catch a glimpse into the nurturing and playfulness that therapeutic parents add to their lives.
"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE."
Jeremiah 29:11