July 17, 2018
Group Meeting Schedule on Saturday, July 21, 2018
The Men's Group
10:15 to 11:30 AM

The Relationship Group
11:45 AM to 1:00 PM

The Dynamic Psychotherapy Process Group
1:15 to 2:30 PM 

The Water Garden Business Center
23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130
Laguna Hills, CA, 92653
The Relationship Group: Narcissistic Experience, Mystification, and the Process of Change * 11:45 AM to 1:00 PM
Even when we are being manipulated or are in a situation or relationship that no longer serves us well, it is often very hard to move on. In the next meeting of the Relationship Group on Saturday, July 21, 2018 (11:45 AM to 1:00 PM ), I will describe a theory of change that can be applied to relationships as well as to situations, institutions and/or predicaments. This theory of change is based on the presence of two elements that characterize many different types of trauma: (1) a "narcissistic" person or situation negates your personal identity in some key way, and (2) this negation may seem so illogical or unbelievable that it is difficult to really comprehend -- this is "mystification."  Ironically, not only does the presence of these two factors cause great distress and turmoil, but it also serves to stimulate any important change one can make in his or her life, i.e., leaving a job, moving to a new place, ending a relationship, becoming sober, and so on. In our next meeting I will unpack what I mean by "narcissistic experience" and "mystification." Then, using two examples (a man who finally left an emotionally abusive relationship and a woman who ultimately withdrew from her family's business), I will illustrate the stages of personal change involved in dis-embedding from narcissistic experience.
The Men's Group: The Target on Your Back: Navigating Your Partner's Pain * 10:15 to 11:30 AM
If you ever thought you were paying the price for how your romantic partner was hurt in the past, you are not alone! It is fairly common for a partner to project his or her past hurt, injury, and pain from prior relationships onto her current partner, and vice versa. Because very little of what we go through is every fully resolved, it appears as if the mind unconsciously needs to revisit and refine the past by imbuing our current situation with distorted and exaggerated feelings and reactions. This dynamic is especially relevant in situations where a person may be truly accountable for hurting his or her partner in a present day situation -- yet, this hurt is further dramatized when it is linked to similar behaviors by others from long ago. In the next meeting of the Men's Group on Saturday, July 21, 2018 (10:15 to 11:30 AM) , we will explore how these dynamics influence the ways in which men are treated by their romantic partners. Further, we will consider how men's common reactions to their partners' exaggerated and distorted perceptions tend to make matters even worse. In conclusion, we will review more effective strategies for containing, and ultimately helping to resolve, our partner's relational history.
The Dynamic Psychotherapy Process Group 1:15 to 2:30 PM
This therapy group utilizes the emerging dynamics among group members, and between the group members and facilitator, as a basis from which to examine one's characteristic ways of thinking, feeling, and relating to others.  Our next group session will be on Saturday, July 21, 2018 (1:15 to 2:30 PM).  A second process group that will be meeting on a weekday evening at my Newport Beach office is starting soon; interested persons may contact me directly at 949-338-4388 or jt@jamestobinphd.com for more information.  
* If you would like to attend the Men's Group and/or the Relationship Group on July 21, 2018, please RSVP to me at 949-338-4388 or  jt@jamestobinphd.com . There is a limit of 14 attendees for each group and registrants will be accommodated on a first-come/first-serve basis. The fee is $25.00. 

Location:
The Water Garden Business Center
23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130
Laguna Hills, CA, 92653

Please note that the Men's Group and the Relationship Group are psychoeducational in nature, not therapeutic, and do not constitute psychotherapy or counseling. In contrast, the Dynamic Psychotherapy Process Group is a therapeutic experience and entry occurs only after a pre-group screening interview.
James Tobin, Ph.D., PSY 22074 | 949-338-4388 |   jt@jamestobinphd.com