The title of this article grabbed my attention from the start,
No One Can Learn from You if You Think that They Suck. You may have heard me mention it during some of the Coach Approach to Adaptive Leadership sessions while discussing our support of others’ growth and development, including letting them know you think they are capable. I thought it was finally time to share it with all of you through our newsletter.
The author’s words resonated with me, more than I care to admit. I reflected back to my work with programs and providers, and I wondered how many times I approached an interaction with a program and unconsciously or even consciously thought that they sucked. And I wondered, did they sense my judgment of them?
I’m convinced that our opinions have an impact on our effectiveness and ability to facilitate change. As Elena Aguilar of the Bright Morning blog so profoundly states in her post No One Can Learn from You if You Think They Suck, “To coach others is to believe, firmly and resolutely, in their potential for growth.”
I am learning each day how foundational this concept is to the coaching process. I have also learned that coaching is not possible without a relationship built on trust. As mentioned in the article, Julio Olalla and Rafael Echeverria agree and maintain, “Without trust, there can be no coaching.”
It’s time to get honest with ourselves about what we think about our clients. Here are some questions to ask ourselves:
Do you believe in their potential to change and grow, even if their skill set is limited right now?
Can you find aspects of who they are and what they do to appreciate?
Can you cultivate unconditional regard for them as human beings?
We can investigate our thoughts and beliefs, and we can shift them. Concluding with sound advice from Elena, “Believe in your clients, see their potential, and they will learn from you.”
I encourage you to read the entire article and let me know what insights it sparks for you.
Submitted by,
Barb Willier
Coaching Coordinator
Pennsylvania Key
