Stepping Up to Talk about
Racial Justice

The other day, I was helping Satya get ready for school. She paused at one point, her “Black Lives Matter” sweatshirt in her hands. She bought herself this sweatshirt a few years ago and has worn it many times to middle school. I noticed her hesitation and casually asked, ”What’s up kiddo?” She said, “Some people don’t like it when I wear this sweatshirt.” And there it was, an opening for one of those timely sneaky deep spontaneous good parenting moments. These are the Holy Spirit moments in parenting! Then it was my turn to hesitate, wondering what I should say next.

Over the last few weeks, the parent group meeting before worship during the Family Faith Formation Program has studied Jennifer Harvey’s book, Raising White Kids: Bringing Up Children in Racially Unjust America. We are doing this in preparation for her visit to Mac Plymouth on November 9 and 10 (see event announcement below). Well, the real reason we are doing it is to reflect on and prepare ourselves better for moments like the one I had with Satya above. Harvey’s book invites questions like, how are we talking about race and racism with our kids? How do we talk with them about inequity and injustice in age-appropriate ways? How do we empower our children to address racism and advocate for racial justice on their own? What does a healthy white racial identity even look like?

It takes grit and grace to have these conversations, something many Biblical characters and our faith can help us with. It takes grit to say something, to try and help our children interpret their experience. It takes grace to overcome our fear of saying the wrong thing.

So, I said to Satya, trying to nonchalantly stall until I could figure out what I should say, “Huh, was it white kids or African-American kids that said that to you?” She said, “African American. One asked if I was black and said this shirt is for black people.” She started putting the sweatshirt on, apparently deciding to put up with whatever comments, positive or negative, she might receive about the sweatshirt. I just said, “Why do you think an African American might feel that way?” She gave an age-appropriate response, “I don’t know” and left to finish getting ready for school.

I didn’t say everything I had imagined saying, but I was glad to have recognized the moment. Who knows if my question helped Satya understand her relationships at school any differently, but I felt good asking it.

All of us need practice and encouragement to become advocates for racial justice in our families, church and community. I am grateful to be finding that here at Mac Plymouth.