I have so enjoyed the daily messages that Holy Comforter has been sending to help us through this difficult time -- they’ve been a lifeline for me, and I’m honored to be able to offer my two cents.  As a psychologist, I am hoping to provide you with some helpful ways of coping with all of this.  As a fellow parishioner, I can assure you that I do not have it all figured out-far from it.  Which brings me to:

Point number one:  It’s NORMAL to be STRUGGLING right now.  This is un-precedented, and no one knows exactly what to do.  Our minds thrive on predictability.  It’s why schedules, routine, and structure are often associated with flourishing -- being “on track”; and why waiting, limbo, and change often seem so trying -- “at loose ends”.  All of the disruption that has resulted from the Coronavirus is a truly unique and highly unsettling experience (an understatement).  We have been waiting collectively for a slow-moving, frequently morphing challenge to arrive.   Have we purchased enough supplies? Have we taken the right precautions? Have we read the best information?…the list goes on. There is no amount of tips and tricks that will make us feel secure.  None of us has been through anything quite like this before.  Whether you are worried about health, healthcare, or how we all recover from this, you are in good company.  We can take comfort in our shared humanity.  If you are having a range of difficult feelings right now -- anxiety, fear, anger, sadness, frustration -- you are not alone. Thankfully, we have reminders from scripture that we are far from the first generation to struggle, and we have a model for how to respond.  We can find comfort in Paul’s message from Romans 5:3-4, “. . . but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.”

Point number two:  Perspective matters.  It’s easy to get locked into one way of thinking:  look at all the things we CAN’T DO!!  Social distancing, kids home from school, canceling trips – this is so inconvenient! See if you can challenge yourself to find another point of view.  We’ve had several helpful tips from Holy Comforter about activities to do, ways to stay connected, and how valuable time in the wilderness can be.  Can we turn our “void” into a “space”?  Space can be filled with possibilities.  When was the last time you had this much “free space”? Sometimes we need to pause, so that we can see a new way forward. “For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” Jeremiah 29:11.

Point number three:  Find Purpose and Meaning in your actions. Already tired of wiping down all the doorknobs and light-switches?  Think of it as protecting your family.  Wishing you could go to your favorite restaurant?  Remember that you are staying home to help your parents, your immunocompromised neighbor, your friends who work in healthcare, and our many beloved Holy Comforter parishioners who are at higher risk of complications.  Connecting the steps we take with why we take them feels much better.  In John 15:13, Jesus said, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends". Yes, we are sacrificing, but it is for a reason, and it is a sacrifice we can bear.

Yesterday, I spoke with a colleague whose family is praying together at 12 noon, as requested by their friends in Madrid and Italy.  I plan to start this tradition with my family tomorrow, and we invite all of you to join us in this act of love and solidarity with people around the globe.   We can’t stop the virus, or the fear and hardships that these precautions are creating in our collective lives; but we can see our shared sacrifice as contributing to the greater good by “flattening the curve.” Perhaps as we support one another, muddle through together, and seek new perspective, we will find comfort knowing that in this moment, there is no higher calling and no greater act of love.