For a long time, I have been noticing that people seem to be more unkind, unsociable, and unfriendly than they used to be. On the freeways, at sports events, in the workplace, at the mall, in schools, and even in churches, I have seen a new rudeness and even crudeness. And the rioting, the looting, and the violence, well, that’s beyond the boundaries of decency and simple morality.
I think the politicians and the pundits are some of the worst. Several celebrities are at war with each other in the media. Sport figures can be vicious on and off the field. On television, on the internet, on the floor of Congress, and in the boardrooms of corporations, people are harsh with their actions, words, and even their tone of voice. People say very mean and outrageous things on Twitter and Facebook. I don’t see a lot of kindness these days.
I hear things like:
“Nice guys finish last,” “Look out for number one,” “I don’t have ulcers. I give ulcers,”
“We gotta make them pay,” and
“Do unto others as they did to you.”
Now, this is contrary to Ephesians 4:32, which says:
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” In 1 Corinthians 13:4, it says
“love is kind.” People who are Christ-followers should practice kindness.
So, what is kindness? It is tenderness, goodness, and helpfulness practiced for others. It is consideration, sympathy, understanding, and compassion aimed others. It is generosity, benevolence, and charity. It is forgiveness, friendliness, forbearance, cordiality, and courtesy that is performed for no selfish motives. Kindness is one of the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-25). If you are living for God, you are working at kindness in your life and your relationships!
Now, why should we behave with kindness? Here are
eight
reasons to practice kindness:
First, kindness is the way Jesus treated people. Authentic Christianity is being Christ-like. And it is Christ-like to be kind. Look at the kindness of Jesus to a crusty tax collector named Zacchaeus (Luke 19), a red-light lady at the well (John 4), a woman with a blood hemorrhage (Matthew 9), or the thief on the cross (Luke 23). Whether Jesus was under stress or not, whether Jesus was busy or not, or whether He was hanging a cross in agonizing pain, Jesus was never abrupt, never uncaring, and never harsh with seeking people. Our Lord was kind. Folks, we demonstrate that we are true Christ-followers when we are kind!
Secondly, kindness is what God expects from His people. The New American Standard Bible, one of the most accurate to the original languages, translates Micah 6:8, this way:
“… what does the LORD require of you: But to do justice, to love kindness and to walk humbly with your God.” Do you claim to follow God? Well then, God wants you to practice kindness. Zechariah 7:9 says:
"… Dispense true justice and practice kindness and compassion each to his brother.”
Thirdly, kindness is grace given by people who have received grace. Proverbs 3:27 says:
“Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act.” Being kind when people are difficult, demanding, or even depraved is an act of grace. We need to be kind to our spouses, our kids, our co-workers and other drivers on the highways, even when they are clearly out-of-line. As Christians, we have the power to manage our emotions and forbear. As sinners who have received God’s grace, can’t we show grace to another sinner?
Fourthly, kindness is the way to love others. Just because you have had a bad day, are tired, sick, discouraged, or have been hurt by others does not give you the right to treat others unkindly. Kindness is what the Good Samaritan showed in Luke 10:30-37, choosing to stop and help at great personal cost to help a pompous enemy of his race. God’s Word tells us:
“Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4). Kindness is taking time to care for and serve others. Love other with kindness -- a good deed, a caring word, or a warm smile.
Fifth, kindness is the behavior of strong and mature people. Most people think they exhibit strength if they look tough and act uncaring. Some people think kindness is a sign of weakness. Actually, kindness is an important element to a healthy marriage or a long-term friendship. Kindness shows emotional strength because you take off the facade of aggressiveness and the mask of hostility. Kind people don’t worry whether their kindness is reciprocated or not. Kind people are so confident that they are don’t worry about rejection. Remember the strong woman of Proverbs 31? Verse 26 says this confident and strong woman:
“opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” And Proverbs 19:22 says the same about a man:
“What is desirable in a man is his kindness …”
Sixth, kindness is how we minister in the name of Christ. Another one of my Plattitudes says:
"Be kind to everyone you meet because everyone you meet has a heartache." Be kind to difficult people since they probably need kindness the most. We need to learn the empathy of Jesus (see Matthew 9:36; John 11:35). When we have learned the kindness of Jesus, we will be able to minister far better in His name.
Seventh, kindness is how we change the world. Just think, if you touch 5 people with your kindness, and then each of those 5 people passes their kindness on to another 5 people, and so on and so on, you can change the world with kindness! Kindness can be shown in time spent or money expended. It can be a letter or a phone call or even an encouraging email. Showing kindness can be a simple as a word spoken and a smile given. Even the smallest acts of kindness can demonstrate the love of Christ. And the more random our kindness is the better!
Lastly, kindness is really a blessing to you. Whether it is a gift, a note, an encouraging word, a greeting, or simply a smile, being kind is worth it. Proverbs 11:16 says:
“A kindhearted woman gains respect ...” Proverbs 11:17 says:
“A kind man benefits himself ...” If you would practice kindness with everyone you meet, with everyone in your family, and with everyone in your sphere of influence, your life would be happier and more fulfilling. Proverbs 14:22 says:
“… But kindness and truth will be to those who devise good.” Do you want to be a leader? Do you want to be a success in this life? Do you want to influence people? Then you need to be kind to every person you know and meet. One of my mentors taught me:
“People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel.” Make people feel good with your kindness.
So, how do we demonstrate kindness?
1. Kindness is demonstrated in the tone of your voice – Is there sarcasm, disrespect, anger, or something biting about the intonation and your manner of speech? Are you careful with your tone of voice so you show respect for other people?
2. Kindness is demonstrated in the words of your tongue – Do you say things with sweetness and gentleness? Are you rude, argumentative, or hurtful with your words? Your word choices can speak with gentleness and respect or with harshness and contempt – your choice!
3. Kindness is demonstrated in the intentions of your heart – What are you trying to accomplish? Are you attempting to help a person? Are you harming or hurting them, building them up or tearing them down? Are pleasing yourself or others? Do you have a personal agenda that is not be God’s agenda?
4. Kindness is demonstrated in the assumptions of your mind – Do you believe the best about this person? Have you made assumptions about that person that are unfounded and unfair? Are you assuming something about the other person that is not accurate?
5. Kindness is demonstrated in the actions of your behavior – Are you helping or hindering this person? Are you affirming or diminishing the other person? Are you allowing that person to be who God wants them to be? Are you showing them grace and love?
6. Kindness is demonstrated by the things you let go – Does that person really need your criticism or your cutting remark? Is it really necessary to point out a mistake someone made or a failing they have? Will your words edify, encourage, and uplift them?
I heard about a nurse who worked in the oncology ward of a hospital. She saw a young man in the hallway outside a dying man’s room. She ushered him to the bedside of an elderly man.
"Your son is here," she said several times until the patient's eyes opened.
The old man was heavily sedated but he saw the young man in the dim light. The old man reached out his hand and the young man tightly wrapped his fingers around it, squeezing a message of encouragement. The nurse brought a chair next to the bedside.
All through the night, the young man held the old man’s hand, and offered words of comfort. The dying man said nothing but he held tightly his hand tightly.
As dawn came, the old man died. The young man placed the lifeless hand he had been holding on the bed, and then he notified the nurse. As the nurse began to say words of comfort and sympathy to the young man, he interrupted her.
"Who was that man?" the young man wanted to know. The startled nurse replied,
"I thought he was your father."
"No, he was not my father," he told the nurse.
"I never saw him before in my life."
"Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him?" the nurse wanted to know. The young man explained,
"I knew he needed his son, and his son just wasn't here. When I realized he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, so I decided to be his son for a while…."
Folks, this story is just one example of kindness. There are thousands and thousands of other examples of ways to be kind. Let’s start a kindness pandemic! Watch for people who need your kindness. Go out of your way to be kind in the stores, at school, in the restaurants, at work, and on the highways. Then, join me in a promise before God to be kind to every person and everybody we meet! And by the way, kindness starts with your family and your church family.
In Proverbs 3:3, God says to you and me:
“Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck, Write them on the tablet of your heart.” Let’s be kind to every person and in ever circumstance – at work, at church, in the car, at school, with our family, and with people we don’t even know! And let’s start today!
I love being your pastor!
Pastor Mark Platt