Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion,
that it may give grace to those who hear.
Ephesians 4:29
Words can make a tremendous impact on your life, can’t they?
Back when I was working at the University, I found myself in a management-level job that I didn’t feel I was qualified for or even good at. It was frustrating and stressful, and I was often disheartened and disappointed in myself. Over lunch, I complained about all this to a good friend of mine who is an exceptional manager. He said, “You’re far better at your job than you give yourself credit for. You’re doing great!”
Less than 20 words, but what an impact they made.
In the verse above, taken from today’s Daily Office Reading, St. Paul tells us how we should speak to each other. He says we should speak not corruptly, but with grace and encouragement. That can be pretty difficult. I know how often I’d rather complain than compliment, insult than inspire, or be critical than constructive. It’s often easier (and more fun) to be negative, but those words can make a tremendous and disastrous impact too.
Instead, my words should build others up and give grace to all who hear. There are a million ways we can do this, but I want to mention three:
First, we should be honest. Flattery won’t work, and neither will spiteful criticism. Instead, our compliments should be genuine, our remarks truthful, and our suggestions sincere. It is so encouraging to hear “Great job!” from someone who actually saw my work.
Second, we should love. We need to have the other person’s best interests at heart. We should be looking to bless them, support them, and make their lives more joyful. I should not seek to be thanked or applauded, or out to prove that I know best. It’s not about me; it’s about them.
Third, we should seek to honor Christ. The way we speak, the words we use, and the intent behind them should all reflect God’s goodness, compassion, and love.
Of course, all this is easier said than done, but with the help of the Holy Spirit, our honest and loving words can lift others up and even point them to Jesus. If we can show other people the love and grace of Christ through what we say, what an impact that will make!
In Christ,
BJ
