“Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with which you were marked with a seal for the day of redemption. Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children, and live in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us…” - Ephesians 4:29-5:2a
I learned a new word this week while on a Zoom meeting with Region 3 (MN, ND & SD Synods) Assistants to the Bishops. That word is “Zoomgrace.” I am guessing that by this time most of us have used the term “Zoom Fatigue” no matter what your vocation is i.e. student, business person, council member, teacher, pastor, deacon, SAM, medical personnel, patient, IT person, etc. Thank God we have the technology to navigate important gatherings during this time of Covid. However exhausting these zoom meetings can be, how much harder would it be to not be able to see one another, even if virtually or hundreds of miles away!
It is no secret we are living in very tense times. Frustration and anxiety are running on some fairly high levels. The desire to be back the way everything was pre-Covid is a strong desire even though it is unrealistic not just in the present but also for the future. Anytime there is massive change, turmoil, or tragedies, life as we know it will never be the same. But it can be good again in the future. There is hope.
It is so similar to the death of a loved one which many of us have experienced these past six months. Ways of grieving together have also changed. Grief is a difficult journey to go through.
There are no short cuts. There are a few steps forward. A few steps back and so on.
Enter Zoomgrace. Where might we as the Body of Christ model Zoomgrace to one another? The temptation to lash out at someone with our frustrations is just below the surface. Might it actually be grief for the multiple losses that is the real underlying emotion? Grief for our young people with hybrid or distance learning, missing out on “normal” school activities, or couples postponing weddings or baby showers? Grief for our families yearning to hug each other in person rather than across zoom miles when a loved one has died or when someone has received heartbreaking health news or relationship changes? Grief because the one place to normally find comfort and solace, your particular pew in the sanctuary or having coffee at the social hall table with your friends, is now not safe to do with this virus still roaming around?
Grief at the way our country is fragmented in its political and judicial processes? Grief as we see and hear the literal groaning of creation with widespread and all too frequent fires and hurricanes causing grave consequences? Grief at the loss of employment and steady income? Grief at having to stop, think and grab necessary hand sanitizer bottles and masks before leaving the house? Everything feels so unstable, out of control, walking on shaky ground.
Enter Zoomgrace. We are all in this together even in the midst of differing political opinions. We are all in this together if society is to not just survive, but come through intact enough to someday thrive. This will all take time. It will take wisdom and courage. It will take grace.
Enter God’s grace. No matter our age or life experience, we are all students learning to navigate a “new normal” for this time and place. Like grieving a loved one, there are sleepless nights and worries that creep in. Yet, the promise that God is with us in the midst of all these changes (both sorrowful as well as blessings happening, too!) should remind us of our call as God’s children, to be bearers of hope. Children and young people are watching adults’ reactions. These younger ones have not experienced Great Depression era situations, World Wars, nuclear bombs, Cold War threats, polio and TB outbreaks, the riots of the 1960’s with its assassinations of political candidates and faith leaders…but, they are watching whether or not we adults show grace to one another - especially in our congregations here and now.
That Zoomgrace goes both ways as we seek to listen carefully to the fears and concerns of our young people. To date myself, my 9th grade Civics and Health courses included reel to reel black & white films on the necessity of running to a bomb shelter (which we did not practice but knew it was the hospital 2 blocks away or the public library which was 10 blocks away) or we were told to hide under your school desk in the event of a nuclear bomb attack. We were naive enough at that time to believe there was a good chance of making it through alive!
Now, our children, young people and educational staff not only face the additional threat of Covid but also the fear of falling behind when some students do not have access to internet or devices for their studies - all of which is compounded with the addition of active shooter drills.
We, as adults, especially in our faith communities, need to model that non-anxious presence for our young people. This does not mean we do so passively or silently. In our Affirmation of Baptism and Ordination vows, we are called to speak truth, to work for justice, mercy and peace. It is imperative that we share our faith even more clearly and in a loving manner. God has brought us through difficult times before and God can be trusted to bring us through again.
We need to share hope with each other. We need to truly love one another as Jesus has commanded us to do even with people who hold differing opinions from us regarding political parties or whether or not it is safe to re-enter a sanctuary. We need God’s grace in order to share God’s grace with one another. Regardless of whether our social interactions happen in-person or via live-stream, pre-recorded or Zoomworld, our children and the world is watching.
It is time to step back. Breathe deeply. Pray constantly. Take in the beauty of creation. Practice gratefulness. Listen to one another respectfully. Honor each other as human beings created in the image of God - just like you and me. Re-set our expectations in this “new norm.” Help wherever and however we are able. Be gracious with others and to yourself.
We will get through this. God is faithful. Post-election and Post-covid will require much repair work in our nation, our communities and our congregations. The Church will not be respected as the necessary agents of hope, repair and reconciliation if we are beating each other up over our differences within our faith communities during this tumultuous time.
“As there is need may your words give grace.” There certainly is a great need for grace in our world. May our words, actions, emails, text messages, Instagrams, Facebook posts and chat-room comments bring grace to all who hear that they might see the Body of Christ, in-person and on Zoom as agents of hope, justice, healing and reconciliation.
-Deacon Brenda Tibbetts
