This month we have put credibility front and center in our conversations about leadership and confidence.
Last week Christine wrote about credibility in an academic setting and how one must be rigorous and unrelenting in their pursuit of truth and results. She laid out a methodology for determining if a source is credible (and we need this more than ever; there are some BAD actors out there trying to pass off terrible ideas that meet zero criteria for credible sources).
This week I want to talk about CREDIBILITY KILLERS in leadership.
What are the things we may be doing (unknowingly?) that kill our credibility?
As you might imagine, I have strong opinions on this subject matter, having worked with leaders of all varieties--the good, the bad, and the downright ugly.
I could sit and talk with you for hours about leaders who shot themselves in the foot (metaphorically, of course. I have yet to be witness to an instance of a leader who harmed themselves) and what I took away from the experience.
For now, allow me to build a list of the top credibility killers I have seen.
Number 1: Failure to SHOW UP. This one makes me get a little hot under the collar. An organization hosts an event and everyone attends but the leader fails to show.
If I had a dollar for every time someone has raised their hand and asked, "Where is my leader?"
The message under the question is obvious: Why are we required to attend, but they are not?
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
Number 2: Blame shifting. "The buck stops here," said Harry Truman. Like it or not, as the leader it is your job to accept responsibility for any and all things that happen under your watch.
It's beyond embarrassing to watch a leader blame shift. A recent example is Rachel Hollis, popular author of the book, "Girl, wash your face". While I didn't read the book, I knew who she was.
Hollis is a case study in leadership done wrong. In 2020 she was called out for appropriating content from other writers and speakers. Instead of taking responsibility...she blamed her team. Ouch. Not learning her lesson, she experienced another PR nightmare earlier this year after posting an insensitive take on her success. Again, she was called out. Again, she shifted the blame to everyone else. "If you aren't as successful as me, it's your fault. Don't hate me for it!" she essentially cried.
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
Number 3: Making yourself the exception to all the rules. You know this leader, don't you? The one who believes they are exempt from the same rules they hold their followers to? This is not a good look and people notice it more than you might realize.
If you ask your people to do something, ask yourself first if you are willing to do it too. If not, you might need to do some self-reflecting.
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
Number 4: Being dumb. This is an open-ended credibility killer that can come in many shapes and sizes. But for me it is failing to know what is going on, not keeping up with current affairs, speaking on topics for which you are not educated or knowledgable, and imagining you are the smartest person in the room.
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
Number 5: All talk, no listen. Culturally speaking, we think leadership is a talking exercise. It isn't. It is a listening exercise. Leaders who are incapable of shutting their mouths and LISTENING TO OTHERS eventually kill their credibility because they miss out on learning about the point of view of those around them.
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
Number 6: Doesn't know the names of their people. If you are a leader, you have a responsibility to meet and know the names of the people that work for you.
I worked with a leader many years ago who was so checked out he didn't know the names of the people working for him. He was fascinated by how I, an outsider who there one or two times a month, knew everyone's name. My answer, "I remember their names because they matter to me." When you don't know people's names, they feel less inclined to follow your lead. Makes sense.
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
Number 7: Being self-important. My friend and colleague, Diane Consolino, talks about "proving energy". I love this term and use it often.
Proving energy is any effort you make to prove to those around you how important you are. It's typically transparent if you are aware of it. (You will start seeing it now in others and in yourself too.)
I recently read a dating profile of a guy who included that he went to an Ivy League school. Next!
I have no idea whatsoever why that would matter in the dating world. "Oh, you are Ivy? Let's date!" What it did instead was repel me because I picked up on the proving energy attached to it.
It is worth noting that we all do this and becoming aware of it can be a fantastic self-awareness exercise.
Proving energy is connected to intention, making it hard to know sometimes if what you do qualifies as proving energy. If you stop and simply ask, "Why am I sharing this? What do I hope to achieve?" then you can get to the heart of your intention. When we make ourselves self-important, we alienate others and over time they don't want to be around us.
Result: CREDIBILITY IS KILLED.
While this list is not exhaustive, it gives you a good checklist of credibility killers. I know we all tend to apply this to others. "Oh wow, Joan does every single one of these things. That proves it, she is a terrible leader!"
Can I gently persuade you to resist that urge and instead ask, "Where might I have killed my credibility and what can I do to restore it?"
That is a much better use of your time and energy.
Best,
Libby
