Terri C. is the mother of Arielle C., a graduate of the Turnbridge Women’s Program.

“In the beginning, I had no idea Arielle was using,” she explains. “To find out it was heroin, was very scary. I was so afraid Arielle was going to die.” After going to Silver Hill, Arielle transitioned to Turnbridge following a suggestion from a family friend. She completed Phases 1 and 2 before returning home.

“I thought I knew how to help her. I thought she was ready [to come home],” said Terri. Shortly after returning home, Arielle relapsed and returned to Turnbridge.

“What I appreciate so much about Turnbridge, is when we came back, nobody said ‘I told you so’. Everyone was extremely welcoming.” Terri shared a specific memory of her first Family Education Weekend following Arielle’s return. “Dave Vieau came up to me and gave me a hug. He said ‘I know it’s hard but it’s going to be okay.”

Terri credits case managers Cori Wilkes and Meghan Bresnahan for their attentiveness and patience with her. “We had many difficult phone calls. They were always there to coach me on what to do. It was a real learning experience for me. I always wanted to help and thought I knew how, but as it turns out sometimes I was doing more hurting. I had to learn to take a step back and trust the professionals. I had to learn to give up some control”.

Arielle now has 16 months of sobriety and has put down roots in New Haven. “Arielle is in school this semester. We don’t know the exact plan for when school ends but she’s built a life for herself, made friends, found a job. She has a sense of independence now,” explains Terri. “I had a very specific [expectation] for her future but even though it doesn’t look like I thought it would, what matters is that she is happy and healthy”.

Terri specifically notes a difference in their relationship. “[In active addiction] she was mean and hurtful. We couldn’t understand why she was being so mean and yelling at us. We didn’t think that maybe she was hurting too”. Since then, their relationship has grown and communication has improved. “Now, she will say ‘Mom, I need to walk away. I need to take a breath’. It helps us both to take a minute to pause.” “I am so grateful for Turnbridge,” said Terri. “Not only has Arielle grown, but so have I.”

Growing up in New York, Isabel S. recounts her struggle with substance abuse and multiple attempts at recovery.

“I tried to get clean several times,” said Isabel. “Each time I would try to do it on my own or go to an IOP. It never really worked.”

Isabel’s ongoing struggle with substance abuse and her mental health were reflective in her relationship with her parents. “We had a mutually mistrustful relationship. I would lie and manipulate them to get money. I’d lie so they didn’t get on my case about what I was doing or how much I was using. We would fight a lot. It was very hostile”.

Finally, her family had hit their breaking point and they urged her to get help. “My parents put their foot down. I’m the kind of addict where no bottom is enough. Ill keep going until I run myself into the ground.”

Isabel entered the women’s program in December of 2017. “I went in kicking and screaming. By the time I got to Turnbridge I was so depressed and beaten down. I didn’t think I could get better, I didn’t think I would make any friends and I didn’t think things would ever change. I had resigned myself to living a life of misery.” Isabel’s defeatist attitude got her off to a rocky start.

“My first few months were really hard. I had a lot of issues with honesty and telling people how I felt.” Isabel says her biggest struggle was changing her instinct to lie and manipulate. “I had a lot of people encouraging me but also calling me out on bad behavior. In Phase 1 and 2, I really struggled with honestly. I continued to try and lie and manipulate until it became clear my old behaviors wouldn’t work anymore.”

 Eventually, Isabel made a decision to change. “I got to the point where I was so miserable, I started to take suggestions because I had nothing left to lose. It didn’t click immediately that it could be that simple; listening to people who knew what they were talking about. It actually started helping”.

This willingness propelled Isabel in a positive direction and she was able to see progress. “Every suggestion I took, things got better. I started to make friends. I got a sponsor. The women I came [into Turnbridge] with have become some of my closest friends in the world.” Isabel’s perseverance and change of attitude helped her see growth in herself and her relationships.

“My parents and I have a vastly different relationship today. There’s mutual trust and respect. We genuinely get along and enjoy each other’s company”.

In Phase 3, Isabel has been able to flourish. “I’m in school, I have an internship and a job. Today, I stress about real life issues like applying to schools, not how to get away with lies or find more drugs. Now, I work on balancing all the cool things I have going on. I have an actual life and I’ve never felt like that before.”

Isabel is currently studying political science at Gateway Community College and hopes to attend Wesleyan. She has a job in addition to an internship at Integrated Refugee and Immigrant Services (IRIS). Isabel’s community involvement has helped her to establish independence and a feeling of belonging. “At first, I hated New Haven and hated Connecticut. Now, I feel like I’ve made an effort to become a part of the community. Not only do I have a Turnbridge family but through my internship, I’m getting involved in the refugee and immigrant community. I’m making friends at school. I have a network of sober women from meetings. I feel like this is a special place to me and I want to contribute to it. It has helped to shape and mold me.”

 Isabel continues to grow and work on her sobriety. “I never thought it would get better. I never thought I’d live the life that I have today. I know the longer I stay and work on my recovery, the more chance I have to keep getting better.”