This past month, Turnbridge clients attended the first annual Recovery Fest in Pawtucket, Rhode Island. This event was hosted by Above the Noise Foundation, a non-profit organization that organizes sober music festivals to provides grassroots funding to U.S. cities that have been particularly affected by addiction. This year’s festival featured musical performances by Macklemore, Fitz & the Tantrums, as well as multiple speakers, meetings, and a job fair.

“Being in a stadium full of other people in recovery was truly a spiritual experience,” said Hope Asher, a Turnbridge support staff member. “It was so inspiring to watch clients learn that they can have fun without drugs and alcohol.”

“I have been to a lot of places and done a lot of things, but that was the most fun I have ever had sober,” said Sophie, a client in the Turnbridge Women’s Program. “I liked hearing the different speakers come up about how they got through addiction, and sharing their stories. I liked how it was mixed in with a concert so you got have fun while learning about recovery.”

“For somebody like me who has been traveling the festival circuit for years and have never been to one sober, to be surrounded by so many people sober and still have fun was inspiring,” said Leeza, another Turnbridge client. “It really helped me see that I could have so much fun sober and not have to use to feel something.”

Lizzie C. is a current client in Phase III of the Turnbridge Women’s Program.

Originally from Larchmount, NY, Lizzie’s journey to Turnbridge was long and arduous. Before coming to Turnbridge, Lizzie described herself as being uncomfortable in her own skin. “I don’t think I was ever comfortable with who I was as a person,” said Lizzie. “I was never really confident. I started finding small voids to fill. There were a lot of underlying issues and I never wanted to address them.”

“I struggled a lot in school,” said Lizzie. “I started fighting with my parents. I was just always really lost. I started drinking and partying and it’s what made me really confident. I felt like I knew myself, but I obviously really didn’t. Then I started stealing oxy from my grandparents.” This was a pivotal moment in Lizzie’s story, because she began to realize that she was no longer in control. She truly loved her grandparents, yet she still could not stop herself from betraying them in this way. “My grandparents are my life,” said Lizzie. “I used to take care of them a lot. Taking care of my grandparents is really where I found happiness, but then I started stealing from them, I found a new love. That’s where I really started to isolate. My parents began recognizing that I was always irritable and isolating, and knew that I needed help.”

“[At first], I wouldn’t admit that I had any kind of issue,” said Lizzie. “Then I went to Silver Hill after my parents discovered that I was stealing oxy from my grandfather. My therapist recommended Silver Hill, and that was life changing, not just for me, but for my whole family. That’s when I initially realized that I was an addict and needed help.”

“[After Silver Hill], I felt I needed more care,” said Lizzie. “I felt like I needed a structured program. They told me about Turnbridge and I told them one of the things that scares me the most about sobriety is not being able to have fun and what attracted me to Turnbridge was the idea of recreation events. I didn’t know how to have fun while clean and sober.” As Lizzie’s journey continued, she found that it was something she simply had to experience to learn. “When I came to Turnbridge I started to learn how to have fun. I would say the Bronx Zoo was one of the most memorable. It was my first rec event. We ended up being at the Zoo for all of 30 minutes because it took two hours to get there and three hours to get back because of unexpected traffic, but what I think was so great about it is was that we made the best of it. We were all listening to music and dancing in the car. I don’t know, it was just so fun. I also went to a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert. It was amazing. We had great seats. We were dancing the whole time. I love concerts and being able to learn how to go to a concert sober was just incredible to me.

Rec events were not the only thing that Lizzie found at Turnbridge. “I really started to find myself,” said Lizzie. “I have experienced things sober that I have never experienced before. It was a new world to me and my family.”

Once sober, Lizzie realized the harm she had caused her family while in her addiction, and recovery gave her the opportunity to make amends. “I did family therapy and that helped tremendously,” said Lizzie. “Turnbridge really taught me to communicate with my family in a respectful and mature way. I learned to take a step back and understand how they feel. I have become more observant with my actions and how they affect my family. It was really stressful and hard in the beginning, but now I am not only calling them when I have a problem, I am calling them with good things and I am able to ask them ‘How is your day going?’. It’s not just about me anymore. It’s a healthy balance with each other.”

“I have goals now and know who I am,” reflected Lizzie. “My dad always says to me now, ‘I feel like I have my Lizzie back.’ I know how to have fun now. I don’t need drugs or alcohol to make me be able to experience things. I’m able to accept and sit with my feelings.  I’m incredibly grateful for this program, and I am still growing every day.”