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The Unity Community
A Weekly Letter About...
What I Decide to Write About!
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April 28, 2018 - Issue 18-17
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Good afternoon,
Weekly...or Monthly?
Some of you, likely those who who will choose the monthly option offered below, don't always find time each week to read this letter. To be sure you all have the opportunity to choose, I'll continue for a few more weeks to announce that I now offer two options for receiving
The Unity Community -
weekly or monthly.
On the first Saturday of a month, everyone will get the same letter. The other 3 or 4 Saturdays of the month only the weekly subscribers will get a letter. If you switch to monthly and are sometimes curious about what you're missing, I post a link each week on LinkedIn, or you can go
here
to review any archived letter after it is published.
I
f you prefer the monthly option p
lease reply from the email address where you receive this letter. I
f you're a person of few words, a
simple "
monthly
" in
the subject line or message will suffice. If I don't hear from you, or of course if you specify weekly, you'll stay on the weekly list.
Please be sure you send your request from the email address where you receive The Unity Community, so I can be sure I'm identifying you correctly.
A Destructive Emotion
Are you angry? At whom? About what?
How's that working out for you? Do the people, or even more so the things or situations, that you're mad at really care? While those people or situations go merrily along their way doing whatever they do, you're tearing yourself up inside. And even if those people or situations are genuinely wrong in some way, will your anger at them help correct them or help them mend their ways? Unlikely!
This week we'll look at some suggestions on how to tame your anger and turn it into useful effort, or at least eliminate its toxicity to you.
Marketing Support for the Business Coaching Industry
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Mental Habits to Manage Emotions
Marcel Schwantes writes many interesting articles on leadership, self-management and teamwork. The article I'm highlighting this week is no exception. He looks at
six examples of ways that people can manage their anger.
To expand on his suggestions, and offer some related points, I'll add these ideas to keep in mind:
- The things that bother us most in others are often things that trouble us most in ourselves.
- Remember that each of us is 100% responsible, not necessarily for what happens but always for how we respond - or react - to what happens.
- The suggestion for a six-second pause is excellent in a live conversation. In the case of email, which seems to carry more than its share of anger, I would suggest 6 hours, or overnight. When the object of your anger is not in the room with you, it's easy to whip yourself into a frenzy and fire off a nastygram. A few hours later that looks, and probably is, completely inappropriate.
- Marcel mentions mending fences after an emotional exchange, and I agree that's important. In almost every case it's the action, not the person, that you object to. So treat the person with respect, even if you still disagree with his or her action.
- Putting yourself "in the other person's shoes" can help you see the reasons, legitimate or not, for his or her actions. Furthermore, if you're both looking at things from the same viewpoint, perhaps you'll see a better way forward together.
It's worth thinking about. We change mental habits only by practicing new approaches when we're thinking rationally, rather than emotionally.
Hate is Prolonged Anger
An emotion related to anger is hate. Hating someone or something is like being permanently angry at the person, thing or situation. Again, this is far more destructive to the hater than it is to the object of the hater's feelings.
A very effective strategy for dealing with hate or anger is to consciously decide to forgive the person, or accept the situation. In the case of a person, it's therapeutic to write a letter of forgiveness. You don't even have to send it! Making the decision and writing the letter will have their beneficial effect for you, whether or not you send the letter. Always remember that the feelings you harbor toward that person, including your forgiveness or not,
matter far more to you than to the other person.
This even works if the person is no longer living!
If you see that person again after this exercise, you will involuntarily carry yourself in a way that says, "I'm OK". You can be friends or not, and even if you still disagree with that person about something, it will be a rational disagreement that no longer carries the intense negativity, and toxicity to you, of hate or anger.
Let's Talk!
How would you rate your anger management? Want to talk about your anger with someone or something? Someone else's anger with you? I'm all ears!
Whatever's on your mind including your suggestions for topics, or other improvements to The Unity Community, is fair game.
Reply to this message or go here if you'd like to talk.
Thanks!
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Stay Top-of-Mind with Your Prospects
If you coach business leaders to help them improve their results, you know the value of staying visible to your prospects and clients until they feel the need for your professional help.
A well-written periodic newsletter targeting your ideal prospects can be a powerful tool to keep you top-of-mind. Then, when they feel the need for a coach,
you'll be the first one they think of, and you'll get the call.
Who has time to write newsletters?
Wouldn't you rather spend that time working your magic for your clients? After all, that's the work you signed up for, that you love...and that you get PAID for.
Unity Copywriting makes it easy and affordable. The newsletter you're reading is an example.
I'd love to learn more about how your business works. If you'd like to discuss
what
you do, please pick a time that works for you here, and let's talk.
New Service!
Want to Connect with More Prospects?
Unity Copywriting has recently teamed up with Smart Money Network, and we can help you connect with 25-35 carefully targeted prospects on LinkedIn each day. Check out this opportunity here (NOTE: This is a new link - the links from earlier issues of this letter will not take you to a useful page.)
Have a wonderful weekend. C
all me
to talk about how we can work together to add value to what
you
do. Our discussion about how we can mutually benefit from joining forces is totally on me. You won't pay me a dime until you hire me to write something for you.
Be well, my friends.
John
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About John
Throughout a career spanning over 45 years my management style has been one of building teams to bring several competent people together to focus on a common objective.
As I transition to life in the Argentine outback, my focus shifts from coaching to helping other business coaches and advisers get their message out to their prospective clients. With my first-hand knowledge of the benefits of effective business coaching, I am uniquely qualified to work with business advisers of all stripes convey their message.
Contact Info
John B. Stevens, Freelance Copywriter
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