I don't remember what I was searching for the day I channeled my inner Alice and tumbled down the internet rabbit hole. All I know is that I fell far and fast. Since that day I'm compelled to squirrel away magazines from waiting rooms or to visit every Goodwill store on the Peninsula to peruse stacks of musty National Geographics. More likely than not, when I'm home alone you'll find me surrounded by images torn from those magazines and an array of glue sticks, 5x8 inch mat board, X-acto knives and scissors. Because the day my inner Alice tumbled, she landed at a place called SoulCollage®.

Observer in the Shadows (Committee Suit) by Mimm Patterson I Am One Who watches in silence. Sometimes I look at you with judgment, sometimes with compassion. I too am watched by a great Eye.

Brought to life several decades ago by a woman from Northern California named Seena Frost, SoulCollage® is an art form and visual journaling practice that requires nothing more than the ability to trust. But I am slow to open. Trust is something that, at times, I lack.

Skepticism, however, is not a trust issue. It's a personal characteristic I hold dear. My inherent skepticism compels me to question everything and keeps me from sipping the Kool-Aid too soon. Of course it's always possible that my skepticism has a shadow side. And maybe it's that pesky shadow that keeps me stuck (I should probably do a card on that!). It was a surprise when, on the day that I said " I Am One Who..." for the first time, my 'stuckness' softened.

SoulCollage® touches on my love for art. It taps into my understanding of transpersonal psychology. SoulCollage® pulls me from the sidelines and makes me an active participant in my spirit dance with intuition and gut instinct. SoulCollage®, I've discovered, is a way to give form to feelings we experience but can't always name.

	Art Reveals the Truth (Council Suit) by Mimm Patterson I Am Art. I burn away all that is no longer necessary. I build your strength and reveal truths you cannot see through other forms of communication. I Am Yayoi Kusama, still creating art in my nineties. My work takes your breath away.

Meanwhile, however, there's my aversion to circles, the kind where we sit around and talk about our feelings. I found myself on the doorstep of SoulCollage® Facilitator Beth Breedlove's welcoming home for her introductory workshop in September 2018. As other participants arrived, we were asked to select a variety of images from three large Tupperware bins on card tables in her kitchen. We pulled one image from our collected bundle and then gathered in her light-filled living room.

Circles make me queasy. I wanted to bolt.

But this circle was different. Maybe it was Beth's calm manner, or the beautiful Native American rattle we held when it was our turn to speak, or the air of curiosity in the room. Beth leads SoulCollage® workshops from her home on a regular basis and one or two of the women with us had participated before. But for most of the women, everything was a brand new adventure. I tapped into that energy and let myself explore the unknown. I swallowed my skepticism, settled my soul and opened my mind.

Beth led by example. She held her image and began to speak, " I Am One Who..." By the end, after all six of us had spoken, I was beginning to understand the potential of the practice. But I found the experiential nature of SoulCollage® difficult to define with words.

My Great Aunt Mimm (Community Suit) by Mimm Patterson I Am One Who loves to teach. I read you stories, taught you crochet, and played songs on the piano as many times as you asked. When young, I convinced the bank to lend me college tuition, in an era when that simply wasn't done. I lived my whole life with fierce independence.

I decided it was best to arrive a blank slate at the four-day SoulCollage® Facilitator Training at Dolce Hayes Mansion in San Jose, California. After Beth's workshop, I had continued to make cards at home but questioned not only what to do with them but if I was even making them 'right'. So in the days leading up to the Training, I dropped any attachment I had to the story I'd told myself about the doors my Training might open. I was excited, but it was an excitement tethered to the unknown.

I was honest. I wondered to myself if SoulCollage® was another angle on West Coast weirdness. On the afternoon of the first day I confessed out loud to my fellow trainees, our teacher Mariabruna Sirabella, and her assistants that I was skeptical, cynical, and judging. As we laughed, I explained my proclivity toward skepticism but promised to shake off the rest.

And then, during our first opportunity to consult our cards, I at last felt the power contained within each small collage.

	Pretty on the Inside (Committee Suit) by Mimm Patterson I Am One Who hides her beauty.

I feel sad when I look at my card Pretty on the Inside, and yet I'm very happy it manifested. Holding it is like holding a mirror to my past. My beautiful mother liked to remind me that my older sister was the pretty one - "You're pretty on the inside," she would say. Growing up, I watched them both use their sexuality as a tool to manipulate boyfriends and husbands. Sixty years later, I still cover myself up with baggy clothes.

SoulCollage® channels the subconscious. It gives voice to aching silence. SoulCollage® allows us to find dreams believed to be lost, to chart a course, and to find comfort in the knowledge of discovering our own path.

It took a few days to process the immensity of what I discovered about myself in San Jose. Since then I've continued to make cards, to pull a card and to journal every morning. Until my Facilitator Training, I was a morning news and coffee junkie. This new pattern brings peace and quiet contemplation to mornings that just a few months ago were loud and anxious.

SoulCollage® puts feeling into form. It transforms intuition from something that's like air - invisible and impossible to hold - into something seen and solid. When we can honor our intuition by giving it shape and color, we honor our own truth.



Mimm Patterson, C-IAYT, rEYT500, MATP completed her SoulCollage® Facilitator Training in September 2018. She is a yoga therapist specializing in functional restoration for chronic pain. She teaches yoga at Samyama Yoga Center in Palo Alto, California, where she is the assistant general manager and program director. An artist and writer, Mimm enjoys life in the Bay Area with her partner Ben and cat Bruce. Her website.

The opinions expressed in the SoulCollage® Community Update are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent SoulCollage Inc. Authors retain the copyright to their individual articles. Please send feedback and questions to info@soulcollage.com.