April 16, 2018
Group Meeting Schedule on Saturday, April 21, 2018
The Men's Group
10:15 to 11:30 AM

The Relationship Group
11:45 AM to 1:00 PM

The Dynamic Psychotherapy Process Group
1:15 to 2:30 PM 

The Water Garden Business Center
23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130
Laguna Hills, CA, 92653
The Men's Group: Men Who Lose Themselves in Relationships * 10:15 to 11:30 AM
"Losing" oneself in a relationship has been viewed as an issue that commonly plagues women. However, recent psychological research and clinical evidence suggests that men, too, frequently lose sight of themselves, their values, goals, and authentic feelings, when in a romantic relationship. In recent years numerous men have presented to my psychotherapy practice reporting that they have "lost control" and given up their "power" to partners who, in turn, have exploited them. Sadly, these men felt manipulated by the very women with whom they were once very much in love.  In the next meeting of the Men's Group on Saturday, April 21, 2018 (10:15 to 11:30 AM), we will explore the notion of "losing" oneself, especially as this phenomenon relates to men in intimate relationships with women. My perspective on this issue centers less on considerations of compliance and power dynamics as they play out in relationships and more on deeply-embedded unconscious attachment wounds that conceal men's vulnerability and expressiveness.  For those who plan to attend this meeting, an article by Deryl Goldenberg, Ph.D. and the rather controversial "Men Lose Their Power with Women" will provide a good introduction to this topic.   
The Relationship Group: Deciding to Stay or Go: How to Evaluate the Viability of a Relationship * 11:45 AM to 1:00 PM
After the honeymoon stage ends and the butterflies wear off, a new couple is faced with the arrival of the real relationship. In this stage, amidst the deepening of emotional and sexual connection, each partner begins to recognize the limitations and shortcomings of the other. Tensions, disagreements, and conflicts emerge as the partners find a way to be with each other and move forward into the future, with the idealism and illusions characterizing their initial perceptions fading into the past.

Indeed, no relationship is perfect and every relationship requires a tremendous amount of work, sacrifice, and perseverance.  Yet, often when problems escalate or seem too difficult to solve, one or both partners may look for the door, seeking to flee the relationship instead of working on it. This is a tendency that seems much more common in the contemporary landscape of dating apps and websites. Others, in turn, may stay far too long. But how does one really know if he or she is in the "right" relationship, whatever that means?   In the next meeting of the Relationship Group on Saturday, April 21, 2018 (11:45 AM to 1:00 PM), I will present several perspectives on how to assess the viability of the relationship you're in. That is, we will identify relationship factors and qualities in you and your partner that, if present, signify the potential for a fulfilling, sustainable relationship. The work of three experts will be considered: Helen Fisher , Harville Hendrix , and John Gottman . If you plan to attend, it is recommended that you review the video links provided.   
The Dynamic Psychotherapy Process Group 1:15 to 2:30 PM
This therapy group utilizes the emerging dynamics among group members, and between the group members and facilitator, as a basis from which to examine one's characteristic ways of thinking, feeling, and relating to others.  Our next group session will be on Saturday, April 21, 2018 (1:15 to 2:30 PM).  A second process group is starting and interested persons may contact me directly at 949-338-4388 or [email protected] for more information. 

* If you would like to attend the Men's Group and/or the Relationship Group on April 21, 2018, please RSVP to me at 949-338-4388 or  [email protected] . There is a limit of 14 attendees for each group and registrants will be accommodated on a first-come/first-serve basis. The fee is $25.00. 

Location:
The Water Garden Business Center
23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130
Laguna Hills, CA, 92653

Please note that the Men's Group and the Relationship Group are psychoeducational in nature, not therapeutic, and do not constitute psychotherapy or counseling. In contrast, the Dynamic Psychotherapy Process Group is a therapeutic experience and entry occurs only after a pre-group screening interview.
James Tobin, Ph.D., PSY 22074 | 949-338-4388 |   [email protected]