Do You Like Feedback on Something You Did or Said?

The Unity Community

A Weekly Letter About...

What I Decide to Write About!

May 16, 2019 - Issue 19-20

Good Afternoon ,

For many people, receiving feedback is painful. They reflexively get defensive when someone criticizes something they did or said. If they're very busy, they're even more likely to react negatively.

Here's my long-time LinkedIn friend, Karyn Danielle Chylewski , discussing how to receive feedback gracefully . The meat of her comments is in a 4-1/2 minute video at the end of her very short article. I encourage you to watch it. She encourages us to thank the person for their suggestion. That may be hard to do at first, but we can learn to do it!

Karyn's thoughts address reaction to criticism, constructive or not. Interestingly I've noticed that many people also react ungraciously even when the feedback is positive. So I would add that receiving praise graciously is also important.

Do you accept people's compliments positively and with gratitude? Some people are as quick to make excuses when someone praises them as they are in reaction to criticism. When a person compliments you, thank him(er) - from your heart!

Missing this will likely do less harm to your relationships than will a defensive reaction to criticism. Nonetheless, you're missing an opportunity to build on a relationship...and that's something you should try never to miss.

I hope you'll listen to Karyn's thoughts on receiving feedback. And think about how you receive feedback - positive or negative - and how it affects your relationships. What does it say about your attitude toward life in general - abundance or scarcity?

Thank people at every opportunity - gratitude is a wonderful thing! Here's a link to my letter from a few years ago on gratitude.

John Stevens

Note: Archived issues of The Unity Community are available here.

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About John

Throughout a career spanning over 45 years my management style has been one of building teams to bring several competent people together to focus on a common objective. I noted early in my career that, in most organizations, there is an enormous amount of time, energy, and effort wasted by people working at cross purposes.

As I transition to life in the Argentine outback, my focus shifts from coaching to helping other business coaches and advisers get their message out to their prospective clients. With my first-hand knowledge of the benefits of effective business coaching, I am uniquely qualified to help business advisers of all stripes convey their message.