Here's Justin Bariso describing the situation Angela Ahrendts found herself in
. She summed up her experience in a simple sentence she thought described a central principle
in an authentic life. See what you think!
In order to be effective, you must gain the trust of the people you encounter in life:
- Your family,
- Your boss,
- Your employees,
- Your co-workers,
- Your customers,
- Pretty much everyone you meet in the course of a day, AND
- Most of all, yourself.
In order for people to trust you, you must be authentic. That means knowing who you are, and standing your ground - believing what you believe, treating people as you think you should, and doing the right thing no matter who's watching - or not watching.
Any time you deviate from that authenticity, you lose credibility, with yourself and with others. Most of us can probably recall a time when we compromised in some way on this principle. It was very uncomfortable, right? And recovery from that deviation is difficult and takes time. You have to regain credibility, first with yourself and then with others.
And we probably all know someone we consider "wishy-washy", or "spineless". Such people indicate agreement with things they actually disagree with, or fail to speak up when they encounter a lack of integrity or honesty. Unfortunately, many politicians fall into this category, and that's why politicians are often distrusted.
Then there are others who may at first appear decisive and direct, but are actually pretending to be someone they're not. That form of inauthenticity becomes apparent pretty quickly. Such people aren't congruent - their actions differ from their words.
In all of this, being authentic doesn't mean being rigid - you can be authentic and flexible. It's possible to differ
pleasantly and firmly with someone else's opinion (and just about everyone has a unique opinion about many things). Of course, you may be convinced of a different opinion, and it's always worthwhile being open to that possibility.
It's important to not to discredit the honestly held opinion of another, no matter how strongly you may disagree with it.
In many situations, a consensus decision must be made which some disagree with, and that may be you. If you're a member of a decision-making body such as a committee or a legislative body, it's important to support the consensus opinion even when you don't fully agree with it, in order for the body to be effective. That would be inauthentic only if you'd failed to express your opinion during the discussion leading to the consensus.
In every case, whether or not your attitudes and opinions differ from those of others, the important thing is to communicate authentically, treat others respectfully, and generally live a life you honestly believe in.
Live authentically in your own skin. I sincerely hope you're comfortable there.
