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5-14-18 - Andy Dolich
Falcon Heavy might be in the A's arsenal
5-14-18 - Andy Dolich
Kiteman's effort ended up 400 feet short
Andy Dolich -- 2015
Andy Dolich
 
FedEx-ing Fans?

By Andy Dolich

A's president Dave Kaval was recently quoted about transportation issues related to the search for a new ballpark. "You have to be creative in how you approach these problems in the modern era, where you have transportation gridlock."

The A's are exploring using an aerial gondola to transport fans from downtown to the Port of Oakland's Howard Terminal ballpark site. This new wave of stadium transportation has fans going over all eight lanes of I-880, multiple access roads, Union Pacific Railroad tracks and BART.

In the same month that the A's were talking about going up in the air from here-to-there, the Los Angeles Metro Transportation Commision was considering a gondola system from Union Station to Chavez Ravine for Dodgers games. Can you imagine Giants and Dodgers fans on the same gondola? Not good!

We might give some thought to several creative alternative FanTrans methods to deliver ticket holders to the proposed new A's ballpark.

The Future:
The Hyperloop --  What better way to move fans around the Bay Area to the ballpark before and after games? It will speed up pace of play by shooting pitchers from the bullpen to the mound and the departing hurler off to the showers or back to the minors. You have to take Elon Musk seriously with one of his Teslas traveling into deep space at 7,532 mph. That's exit velocity!

A's Space Race:
Elon Musk's Falcon Heavy, to be launched later this year from the Kennedy Space Center, is a mammoth vehicle and the most powerful since the shuttle system shot into space.

Blue Origin Gabillionaire owner Jeff Bezos launched a New Shepard suborbital capsule from West Texas, boosting a suite of microgravity experiments and an instrumented dummy astronaut, known as Mannequin Skywalker, to the edge of space. What better way to beat the traffic than your own A's rocket? Walnut Creek to a Howard Terminal splashdown in 4.5 minutes.

Back to the Future:
The A's, who are a high-tech driven front office, have been looking at several old-time transportation options that have stood the test of time in getting humans from point 
A's to B.

Kavalpault:
Fans will be strapped into the ultimate Fan Flinger from the roof of the Marriott on Broadway and 11th Street, then flung over ten lanes of Hwy 880 traffic and safely land in a net near the left field entrance. This parabolic trip will be included in the ticket price for adventurous A's fans.

5-14-18 - Andy Dolich
The Flying Zacchinis ... out of retirement?
5-14-18 - Andy Dolich
Options abound...

The Flying Zacchinis:
In 1985 the Oakland A's were the first team in baseball to have an opening night delivery of the first pitch by a human cannonball. The Famous Flying Zacchinis were happy to have a baseball blast at the Coliseum. The human cannonballs were shot out of a cannon from centerfield with the ball in their costume. After landing in a net near the pitcher's mound, the ball was given to the night's honored guest for the first pitch. If the Gondola project doesn't take off, the A's have talked about using the corporate headquarters of the consumer products giant on Broadway to shoot fans directly into their newly named  
Clorox Bleachers.

Tubeing it:
It's only a measly mile from the Alameda Tube to the Howard Terminal ballpark site. Caltrans, working with Tunnel engineers, are looking at building a connector from the Tube right to the ballpark. This solution will take eight years at an estimated $1.7 billion in public dollars.

Kiteman Backpack:
Kiteman became famous in Philadelphia in 1972 when tasked with delivering the first pitch from a 140-foot-ramp in centerfield at Veterans Stadium. When his name was announced over the public address system, Phillies fans started booing. The booing continued after Kiteman finally took a step off the ramp, was blown off the chute, and fell down rows of seats before crashing into the railing of the upper deck. Though he miraculously survived the fall and managed to hold on to the ball, the poor guy tried to make up for the gaffe by throwing the ball to home plate. He groggily dropped it into the Phillies bullpen located 400 feet from the diamond.

The A's are looking at several ramp locations on the Oakland side of Hwy 880 for beta testing. Kiteman's great grandsons are working with the A's to test it out with thrill-seeking A's fans strapped on their backs.

Party Ships:
What better location than the Port of Oakland to unload your own A's Party Container. Groups from around the Bay Area can book transportation. Each container seats 80 people, has a no cash bar, flat screen TVs, ergonomic massaging seats, and a DJ for the nautical trips to the game. The Quay Cranes unload the container and gently place it directly into the stadium where the side is rolled down, the seats rotate toward the field, and the baseball party continues.

5-14-18 - Andy Dolich
Charlie-O, the Mule was the mascot of the Kansas City Athletics and Oakland A's from 1963 to 1976. The donkey was named after equally cantankerous team owner Charles O. Finley. When Finley moved from Philadelphia to Kansas City in 1963, he changed the long-standing A's elephant in favor of a Missouri mule, perhaps to attract fans from the heavily Democratic state. When the Athletics left Kansas City after the 1967 season, there was debate about whether Charlie-O, the mule, not the owner, should stay. 
Reprinted courtesy NBC Sports.


Charlie-O the Mule:
This is the ultimate back-to-the-future feature that the A's marketing mavens are considering.

What better way to get to the ballgame than putting your ticket-buying butt on an ass. The A's will designate a special Mule VIP Valet parking area. Charlie-O droppings will serve to assist the A's ground crew in going green with Mule Mulch, helping to fertilize the field at the new ballpark.

Andy Dolich, President, Dolich Consulting. Dolich has held executive positions in the NFL (San Francisco 49ers), NBA (Memphis Grizzlies, Golden State Warriors, Philadelphia 76ers), MLB (Oakland A's), NHL (Washington Capitals) Pro Soccer and Lacrosse. Dolich is the Entrepreneur in Residence at Menlo College and co-author of

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3-6-17 - Pops

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