The Irony of Sanctuary
By Letitia Mann
The word
sanctuary
gives me pause. The Hebrew word for sanctuary (מקדש) comes from the root word
kadash
(קדש) “to be set apart as sacred.” Sanctuary suggests a place of refuge, protection, a place of rest separate from our daily life. Certainly that’s how the word is commonly used.
But until I was asked to share my reflections on this year’s theme of
sanctuary
, I hadn’t thought of Beth Emet as a sanctuary in this way. It’s easy for me to share the many times when I’ve felt the warm embrace of our community, however the 15-plus years at Beth Emet have been a journey with many challenges as well.
Can Beth Emet be a sanctuary and still be the source for deep reflection, struggle, and intense discourse? Do the bumpy milestones of personal growth fit within this idea of
sanctuary
? Perhaps I made a mistake in offering to help with this project!
But as I reflected more deeply on the theme for this year from Exodus 25:8: “Let them make for me a sanctuary, that I may dwell in their midst,” I discovered that my experience with Beth Emet over so many years is fully under the tent. With this expanded mindset I am compelled to embrace the irony that in the safe space that is a
sanctuary
, we are able to see and challenge our deepest fears and to grow in courage and understanding. Perhaps that is the true nature of God’s love, which I can easily say is present in our community and the space we inhabit at Beth Emet.
When I came to Beth Emet in 2001, I was a recently retired working professional, curious about my husband Jeff’s and my new home in the suburbs and our emerging life with small children. That time of my life felt like a frontier – energetic social beginnings with neighbors, daily home life that included lots of laundry and outdoor excursions with our huge dog, plus new engagement with a religion that felt foreign to me. As an interfaith couple, the decision to raise our children in the Jewish tradition was based on indifference to my own religion and a desire to honor Jeff’s heritage, Jewish on both his mother’s and father’s side. A seemingly simple decision turned out to be the gates beyond which my most profound personal growth has occurred. Beth Emet seemed more like a challenge than a sanctuary at this time of my life.
Sometimes being pulled into new experiences designed for children allows our critical adult perspective to relax and makes it easier to embrace concepts beyond the experience. I was lucky to enter into a Jewish lifestyle by singing and dancing with my children at Tot Shabbat services, by sitting in the tiny chairs designed for pre-schoolers as you make little challahs, and better still, to learn the
alef-bet
with my daughter. It’s a joyful experience, and like a cake with layers, the top layer is sweet. From there I took advantage of Beth Emet’s wide variety of adult classes on Jewish texts, thinking, literature, lifestyle and current day politics, and soon enough I was taking Hebrew for adults. If creating a sanctuary requires an expansion of understanding and a deepening of relationships, it was working.
About ten years after we arrived at Beth Emet, following years of incremental adult reading and study, I joined a group of women and men eager to read Torah and become b’nei mitzvah. It was a deeply meaningful period of engagement. This was another milestone, steeped in greater awareness of ancient texts, rabbinic and modern commentary, and lots of discussion with not only the rabbi and the cantor but also many adults in our community in preparation for this passage. As a part of that experience, I realized that my path forward needed to include a more conscious focus on
g’milut chasidim
, acts of loving kindness, which harnesses my longtime interest in making a difference in the world. Becoming connected to Jewish values and commandments is part of the full experience of what it means to create a sanctuary within my heart.
Perhaps it seems obvious that without challenge, there is no personal growth. But until I reflected more deeply on the nature of what it means to create a
sanctuary
for God’s love, I didn’t connect the dots. Because of the sanctuary that is Beth Emet, I was able to explore new ideas and look more closely at difficult subjects like racism and homelessness, and engage more directly in shaping a more positive future. I’m grateful for the curious, warm and vibrant community of Beth Emet.
