3 R D A N N U A L
FRIENDS FOR
LIFE LUNCH
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THURSDAY, MARCH 7, 12 - 1 PM
TOWN & COUNTRY CLUB, ST. PAUL
PROCEEDS SUPPORT LBFE'S COMPANIONSHIP PROGRAM
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Hosted by myTalk 107.1's Dawn McClain
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Special message from Barry ZeVan, "the Weatherman"
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Plus, a rollicking performance by the Plymouth Rockers!
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Thank you to our sponsor!
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This musical match strikes a harmonious chord
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Growing up in Hungary with a mother who was a symphony violist, Agnes acquired an interest in music at an early age. When she was a mere seven years old, she started playing classical piano.
"I always liked music and enjoyed being in school programs,” Agnes acknowledged. “In high school, I was the only one who could play the piano.” At age 22, she found she had relatives in Minnesota who would sponsor her to immigrate to the U.S. Upon arriving, she immediately began school at the International Institute because she could not speak a word of English. Eventually, Agnes fell in love and married a musician. They formed a trio with a friend and began playing in local jazz clubs.
It’s been many years since she performed professionally, but Agnes still has a love of music running through her veins. For the last eight years, she has enjoyed playing the piano at events in the senior housing where she now lives. When residents heard her wonderful playing of the piano in her room, they found a way to purchase a used piano for their community room.
But now a widow and living alone without any family in Minnesota, Agnes turned to Little Brothers – Friends of the Elderly for companionship. As fate would have it, Isaac joined LBFE as a Visiting Companion, and a musical match was formed.
Also having a great interest in music, Isaac played classical piano from the time he was in kindergarten until the sixth grade. Throughout high school and into adulthood, he continued to make music his primary hobby but eventually other responsibilities competed for his time. Now, as a student in the University of Minnesota's doctoral program in veterinary medicine, he has enough to keep him plenty busy, along with tutoring and assisting at an animal hospital. However, for the past year-and-a-half, he has made time to spend with Agnes and their shared love of music. "Loneliness is something we can all relate to,” Isaac noted. “I really like the approach of creating individual connections through LBFE."
Together Agnes and Isaac have attended concerts, including the Minnesota Symphony Orchestra and Music in the Park. And, while they both appreciate their musical match, they have found an even deeper connection. "I have a companion who is an added source of meaning in my life," said Isaac.
- Karen Kitchel, contributing writer
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'The days are getting longer!'
by James Falvey, Executive Director
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That is often the mantra people repeat to help get through the cold, long nights of winter. We need something to focus on after the flurry of holiday activities. Often there isn’t much to keep us buoyed except the promise of spring, which can seem like a distant light at the end of a long tunnel.
But there
is
a new light this year for a number of the older adults we serve.
In past years, with the help of hundreds of volunteers, Little Brothers – Friends of the Elderly put on spectacular Thanksgiving and Christmas events that provided a wonderful flash of social activity for many of our older adults.
This flash of activity would then dim for both our Elder Friends and our volunteers because these holiday relationships only came together twice a year.
This year, because of some outstanding work by our staff and two very special and talented volunteers, Marcie Spears and Kris Jones, we changed our holiday celebrations from large group events to individual home visits. This provided each of our Elder Friends with personal one-to-one time with a volunteer focused entirely on them, and it gave our volunteers an opportunity to see what LBFE’s year-round visiting programs really look like.
The result: We increased the number of Elders who signed up to participate and we are seeing a huge increase in the number of holiday volunteers expressing interest in visiting year-round!
Because of you and your support, we are bringing the warm light of new, year-round relationships to more of our community's lonely older adults. I want to thank everyone in our LBFE family for a terrific year. Whether you contributed as a volunteer, as an Elder Friend, a donor, or a combination of all three, it is you who brings hope, joy and meaning into the lives of some truly extraordinary people.
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Home for the Holidays 2018
Personal visits made the holidays merry and bright
LBFE celebrated Thanksgiving and Christmas in the homes, residences and nursing homes of 176 elders this past holiday season. Representing a departure from past large-scale sit-down events, the home visits included deliveries of fresh flowers and gifts, plus whole pumpkin pies at Thanksgiving and festive holiday cookies at Christmas.
But more important was ensuring that isolated elders shared a significant portion of the holidays with caring volunteers in a relaxed one-to-one visit in their homes.
These joy-filled visits were made possible through the generous donation of time and energy of 312 volunteers. Many of these volunteers were individuals or families who visited elders in their homes; others baked pies and cookies, wrapped gifts or prepared packages for delivery.
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These joy-filled visits were made possible through the generous donation of time and energy of 312 volunteers. Many of these volunteers were individuals or families who visited elders in their homes; others baked pies and cookies, wrapped gifts or prepared packages for delivery.
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Following the visits, the elders flooded LBFE with phone calls and cards expressing their appreciation. Comments included: “It was so nice to have someone to talk to.” “Enjoyed the visit from the family.” “It helped make my day as it was the first major holiday without my wife.”
The volunteer visitors were uplifted by the experience which, for some, marked the beginning of an ongoing friendship. One volunteer wrote, “So happy to have had time to chat with Jim. We have made plans to have lunch every other week.” And, “I visited Gloria with my family … She called to thank me afterwards and I found myself over at her place again today for a visit.”
Thank you to all who made Home for the Holidays successful -- volunteers as well as financial and in-kind contributors. Your continued support ensures that we can provide our isolated elders with companionship and meaningful social activities during the holidays and throughout 2019.
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Allianz employees filled the room with holiday spirit!
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In mid-December, nearly 50 elder friends celebrated the season at a festive holiday lunch at LBFE. Fifteen employees from Allianz Life Insurance of North America joined longtime LBFE volunteers to serve the meal, distribute gifts and provide companionship. The festive menu included roast beef and gravy, red potatoes, green bean casserole and assorted desserts. We also appreciated the partnership of Gifts for Seniors, who contributed brightly wrapped presents for the elders to bring home and put under their tree – or open on the spot!
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The transformative power of
Listening to elder lifestories
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Those who are new to Little Brothers – Friends of the Elderly often ask about the older folks we serve in terms of demographics or statistics: What is the average age? Which neighborhoods do they live in? What services do they require?
These common descriptors are helpful to know, but fail to give a true picture of these beautifully unique and extraordinary older persons. People like Agnes, who you learned about on page one, come to us with a rich past and vibrant present. Each elder friend has decades’ worth of stories to tell and lessons to be learned from, such as the beauty and challenges of past or present relationships, the value of preserving their heritage, perseverance in achieving goals, and adherence to faith when things seem bleak.
These stories are priceless and we can all benefit from them. We need only listen.
When we listen –-
really listen –- we’re not just employing our ears. We’re listening with our heart and our gut. By being a good listener, we’re inviting the elder we’re with to tell their story and we respond with empathy and openness and without judgement.
There are benefits for elders who share their stories. For example, it helps them recognize that their lives have been productive and meaningful. It also provides a process for them to integrate their past with their present and future. In addition, they exercise their creative skills as they reflect on past experiences and communicate them with humor, sadness, or other emotional expression. “Whether through conversation, writing, making storyboards or other activities, sharing life stories can also increase memory and help improve the health of older adults,” said Ann Fosco, LBFE Community Impact Director.
Benefits for those who listen to older storytellers are chronicled, as well. One study of gerontology student nurses who listened to and reflected on elder stories revealed the transformative power of the stories: They reported that they were drawn in and captivated by the story, gained new information, and then developed new perspectives on how they would perform their duties as nurses in the future. They realized that the myths and stereotypes they had were ageist and detrimental to the care of the elders; they came away with a new appreciation of the value and integrity of elders.*
Elders who are isolated and lack connections have little opportunity to share their stories. As an LBFE Visiting Companion or Friendship and Flowers Visitor, you can play an important role in enabling an elder to share their story -- simply by being a caring listener and friend.
*Jeanine Robinson Tweedie,
Listening to elders’ stories: Transforming nursing students’ perceptions about gerontology nursing
(Charles Darwin University; May 2012)
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The following LBFE elders and volunteers were remembered at our December memorial service:
Dorothee Angel
Maryann Atkinson
Mardell Braun
Kitty Brundage
Dorothy Cauton
Daniel Chapman
Susan Corniea
Agnes Degerstedt
Jerome Grundmayer
Irma Johnson
Paul Kottmer
Charles Litz
Norman Sorensen
Donald Sours
Stephen Ramstad
Maryann Tinnes
Nancy White
Richard Whiting
Our next memorial service is Monday, May 20, 2019, 4 - 5:30 p.m. at 1845 East Lake Street in Minneapolis. Please
contact Sandy O'Donnell if you would like to attend.
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MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR GIVING'S IMPACT
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Do you consider yourself a philanthropist? You are if you donate or volunteer. While the term is often used in connection with a person who gives considerable money or time to a cause, you don’t need to be a tycoon or lottery winner to make a difference with your philanthropy.
If you’re like most of us, you have a limited contribution budget. Now is a good time to develop a personal giving plan for 2019 based on the causes that are most important to you. Determine the total amount you wish to donate, then allocate perhaps 75% or 80% to them. Consider keeping the remainder uncommitted so you can respond spontaneously when, for example, someone you care about asks you to support their worthy cause or a natural disaster occurs.
You can use additional strategies to add greater consistency, ease and impact to your giving plan, such as:
- Monthly giving. Spread your giving throughout the year and reduce your paperwork with automatic deductions from your checking account.
- Donations of non-cash assets. You may wish to convert stocks, mutual funds, real estate and other non-cash assets into funds for charitable giving.
- Donor-advised funds. Setting up this type of philanthropic account gives you the ability to designate grants to your favorite charities while providing tax advantages.
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Our heartfelt thanks are offered to the following organizations that have awarded grants or gifts to the Minneapolis/St. Paul Chapter of Little Brothers - Friends of the Elderly from July 1 through December 31, 2018. Grants support general operations unless noted otherwise.
Allianz Life Insurance Company of North America
Elmer L. and Eleanor J. Andersen Foundation
Fred C. and Katherine B. Andersen Foundation
Bergerson Family Foundation
Burdick Family Fund of the Minneapolis Foundation
Charity Incorporated
Choi-Chiu and King-Wo Lam Family Fund of The Minneapolis Foundation
Edith Clark Charitable Foundation of the Catholic Community Foundation
Cliff Foundation, a Donor Advised Fund of the Renaissance Charitable Foundation
Cub Cares Community Fund
Paul and Patricia Curran Foundation
Gacki Family Fund, a Donor Advised Fund of the Renaissance Charitable Foundation
Hardenbergh Foundation
HRK Foundation
IWJ Charitable Foundation
Margaret H. and James E. Kelley Foundation Inc.
Leonette M. and Fred T. Lanners Foundation
Jim and Linda Lee Family Foundation
James T. Nystrom Foundation
Onan Family Foundation
The Jay & Rose Phillips Family Foundation of Minnesota
The Elizabeth C. Quinlan Foundation, Inc.
Stevens Square Foundation (
Visiting and Advocacy Program)
Target Foundation
James R. Thorpe Foundation
H. E. and Helen R. Warren Foundation
Watson Family Fund, a Fidelity Charitable Donor-Advised Fund
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First Annual Run, Walk 'n Roll
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LBFE’s Not Alone Run, Walk ‘n Roll around Bde Maka Ska in late September brought together friends, families and many new acquaintances. Walkers distributed flowers in recognition of International Day of Older Persons and feasted on cheesecake and cookies served up under the tent. Thank you to our many participants and donors, as well as our sponsor WDGY, for your support!
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Our Elder Friends look forward to our monthly Cards, Crafts and Coffee where they express their creativity while enjoying cookies (a different recipe every month!) donated by volunteers Cheryl and Mike Kostecki. At September’s event, LBFE Intern Madeline Antoine appreciated the wrist keychain that Robert crafted.
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December’s Café at LBFE generated meaningful discussion with the showing of
Gen Silent, a film depicting the isolation and fear that many LGBT older persons continue to face. Let’s Do Lunch Café is held the fourth Friday of every month for members of the LGBT community and allies, and generally includes enrichment and senior services information.
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Each of our Elder Friends was guaranteed a gift or two under threir tree, thanks to the generosity of many individuals and organizations, including Diane Gaughran; Our Lady of Mt. Carmel Women’s Guild; Abdo, Eick and Meyers; Thrivent Financial; Gifts for Seniors; and Faegre Baker Daniels. The gifts were distributed at our December holiday party, by Friendship and Flowers visitors and by Home for the Holidays visitors.
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1845 East Lake Street
Minneapolis, MN 55407
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Phone: 612.721.1400
Fax: 612.721.5848
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