“An‭d I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.” Ezekiel 36:26

The water was almost too hot. My hands couldn’t manage to be immersed for more than a few seconds, but I was so over all the coughs and the snotty noses that trying to kill germs with extra hot dish water seemed like a good option. I stood there doing the dishes from our evening dinner, something I did three times a day, everyday. But this time a huge smile came across my face, along with a softening in my heart. I could feel it. As I listened to the giggles in the background of our boys wrestling with daddy, I felt such a joy and peace that it’s hard to explain. 

That’s when it hit me. That’s when God revealed it. He had changed my heart. You see not that long ago I was jealous of my husband. Here I was staying home all day with the kids which meant; lots of disciplining, cooking, cleaning, laundry, dishes and repeat. Then he got to come home and be the fun dad. The one that got to play and enjoy this season of wrestling matches and “football games”. Sometimes I’d get so angry. I didn’t want to feel those feelings and I would just let out huge sighs looking at the pile of dishes that still needed to be done from dinner. Who was going to do it and get it done before bath time? Me. 

After feeling some resentment taking root, I paused right there in my pile of dishes and cried out to God (silently of course, a big football game was going on behind me). “God change my heart. I don’t want to be angry, I want to be so grateful for a husband who plays with our kids. I want to be so filled with gratitude for the meal we just enjoyed together on the dishes that I get to wash. Forgive me for allowing myself to get to the point of bitterness. Take it away Lord.” 

As thoughts like that would surface, I would silence them with prayer. And then the night came. Me hunched over a sink full of piping hot water and rinsing dishes, one by one. That smile. That feeling. God had changed me. He had changed my heart and at that point tears of gratitude fell. Tears fell not only for a husband who is so invested in our kids, for the food on the table and the dishes in the sink, but for a God who used dirty dishes to change me. 

Where have you noticed that God needs to soften and change your heart?