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A Renewed Need to Trust

Let me hear of your steadfast love in the morning,
 for in you I put my trust.
Teach me the way I should go,
 for to you I lift up my soul.
Psalm 143:8

I don’t know about you, but I’ve discovered in the last few months that although I say I trust God and have seen Him provide and show up in miraculous ways so many times, there are still so many ways in which I have yet to learn to trust Him fully. It’s no surprise really. There are a myriad of tragedies and uncertainties we’re facing right now. We’ve had a virus that can hit anyone with any degree of severity, the resultant strain on our healthcare system, big picture economic concerns, travel restrictions that change the possibility of seeing loved ones, business closures and job losses, and the longer term questions of how long will this uncertainty be with us? What will life post-pandemic look like? How is our world going to change for good? For those who’ve had COVID, what are the unseen longer term health consequences? When will schools be able to open safely? When will be able to gather in worship again? When will be able to see those we’ve been without for so long?

I have come to realize just how much I lean and trust in certain things, over and above the God who made them all: my life with you all at St. Martin’s, my routines, my health, and the ability to hop across the Atlantic whenever I want to see family and friends. The uncertainty and challenges of this long, unfolding ‘moment’ has revealed to me so many areas in which I am still learning to trust in God.

My favorite of the daily offices is the Anglican liturgy of Compline or Night Prayer. Something about it is deeply comforting and reassuring as the end of the day looms. It is short, which always helps me, and it invites me to give to God all the stresses, successes, fears and failures of the day as I prepare to lay my head on the pillow. It slows me down and it stills my heart, even in 2020. The verse above from Psalm 143 was in one such Compline service recently. As I prayed through the Psalm, God reminded me through these words that He is trustworthy. He will keep me through whatever comes my way. I can trust it all to Him. He will see me through this new world we live in just as He has seen me through all that has gone before. As I look to Him, He will show me the way. And He will do the same for you.
The Rev. Dr. Suse E. McBay
Associate for Adult Christian Education and Prayer Ministries
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