moneymovesnews

 

March, 2012

 

Celebrating 60 Years -  

The Diamond Anniversary   

 

Greetings!

 

February 16th marked my parents', Harriet and Joe Knight, 60th wedding anniversary. My siblings and I surprised them with a dinner celebration including thirty-five of their closest local friends and family. Given the commonly known statistics that more than half of all marriages end in divorce and only 5% of marriages make it to the diamond anniversary, how did Joe and Harriet beat the odds?

 

The romantic side of me dreamily answers that they are a match made in heaven and their marriage is the epitome of a fairytale. But, that is not an accurate portrait. In reality they fought, endured, managed, and navigated the intricacies of a complicated relationship. They raised four children while my father worked long hours for the first twenty-five years of their marriage and my mother stayed at home to tend to our needs and the home. Theirs was a typical domestic arrangement of the 1950's.

 

Reflecting deeper on what I know about their relationship, there are two areas that point to sustainability: a thread of indestructible love, and clear money agreements. The first consideration, indestructible love, compels me. No wonder the diamond, known for its indestructible qualities, was chosen as the 60th anniversary symbol.  Indestructible love holds mystery to this outsider. Amidst the confusion, doubt, anger and fear of their marriage, there has also been love that endured even the worst of moments. I witness it. I feel it. I experience myriad flavors of love myself. But their love is only truly understood by them. I imagine that their indestructible love includes an element of commitment and recommitment. Masters of lasting love Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks say choosing each day to be with the other is an essential ingredient to a lasting relationship.

 

Relevant to our discussions here, coupling their indestructible love with clear money agreements has been key for Joe and Harriet. From the beginning of their marriage, they decided to keep separate accounts for their banking, investments and financial affairs. While they share in household expenses, filing tax returns and estate planning matters, they keep their financial affairs completely separate.

 

Every couple creates, consciously or unconsciously, money agreements. When money agreements work, they add to the longevity of a relationship. When they don't work, they add a toxic chasm to every other area of a couple-ship. For example, if there are scarcity concerns about spending or debt, it is likely there are scarcity issues regarding intimacy, time, self-esteem and so on. Money issues frequently parallel other relationship issues.

 

How do we make money agreements? First, we recognize that they are present and that they call for our attention. Second, we commit (and recommit) to consciously create agreements that work for each unique relationship. Third, we follow proven processes for making agreements (I have included an offering under Be Inspired). Finally, when tensions arise, the only place to go is inside. Tension is the ultimate invitation for us to explore our internal landscapes, to grow and to make agreements that we intend to keep.

 

Congratulations Mamma and Daddy, and all of you who model lasting relationships with indestructible love and conscious attention to money matters. Your efforts are as precious and priceless as diamonds.

 

Reflecting on the dinner celebration, the evening was a beautiful display of the mandala of their life, complete with laughter, friendship, love, anger (a guest miffed with the driving of another guest carelessly flipped off their evening dinner companion!)  Yes, their unique love was all there for us to witness!


Applauding with a deep bow,

 

In This Issue
5-Minute TRY It!
This Month's Article: "Tax Etiquette, Tax Integrity"
MoneyMoves TeleConnections
Be Moved...
Be Inspired...
 
5-Minute TRY It
Earth & Body: Connect, Merge
& Breathe 

Note:  Inspired by my teacher, Reggie Ray, and other body-meditation practices. Get willing to lie on the ground ...

 

1.  Minute one:   Lie down on the ground/ floor with your knees bent and together, feet comfortably apart, hands resting right over left on belly. (Strap your knees together above your quads for extra support if desired.)  

 

2.  Minute two:   Rest into gravity and notice any tension located in your body. Tensions might be: body sensations, pain, thoughts, tingles and feelings, etc.

 

3.  Minute three:  Bring your awareness to the points where your body makes contact with the earth. Connect these points energetically and allow your tension to merge with the earth through these points.  

 

4.  Minute four:  Use your breath to magnetize merging and to soften. On the in-breath, access tension. On the out-breath, release, through the points of contact.

 

5.  Minute five:  Merge your breath with the earth. Harmonize the movement. Soften any and all body tension by releasing and merging with the earth.  

 

Complete your practice by inviting the earth to continue to receive any tension that arises through all points of contact.

 

Bonus: See the body mediation series with Lisette Cooper, PhD. under Be Inspired.

 
Tax Etiquette, Tax Integrity 

 

"There are two systems of taxation in our country: one for the informed and one for the uninformed."

 

"Any one may so arrange his affairs that his taxes shall be as low as possible; he is not bound to choose that pattern which will best pay the Treasury; there is not even a patriotic duty to increase one's taxes."

 

- Learned Hand, Judge, United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit

 

Taxes. The thought of, the actions to complete, the topic of lively banter in conversation, our past experiences positive or negative -- taxes conjure many feelings and emotions for U.S. citizens. American residents are required by law to complete a Form 1040 (Income tax return) every year. For single filers, when income (earned and/or unearned) exceeds $8,500 you begin to pay a tax at the 15% rate. Details of filing status options, tax rates, deductions, exemptions, credits, exclusions, deadlines are easily accessible at your local library and post office. Of course the internet offers a plethora of information as well.  Most people, however, seem to have very little interest in knowing much of anything about income tax law. Most of us want to get our taxes "over with" -- as efficiently, cheaply, and effortlessly as possible.  This is a natural response to a complicated system fraught with politics, self-interest, confusion, and dare I say, ignorance - even within the IRS.

 

I would like to offer an alternative approach, to uplift your relationship and engagement with the tax system and tax preparation...

 

Continue reading this article on my website. 

 

 
Please join me for our next 
MoneyMoves™ TeleConnection

Our topic will be:  Tax Wise & Tax Etiquette

Monday,  March 12th
8pm-9pm EST
 
The call-in information will be emailed to you.
 
Be Moved

 

  I'm proud to pay taxes in the United States; the only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money.

~Arthur Godfrey

 

 
 
Be Inspired

 

Body-Based
Meditation Series


Weekly Wonder

 
 

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