You, or another member of your crew, has just made a mistake while officiating a contest. The angst quickly builds as you assess the play where a misapplication of the rules or a miscalculation in judgement were used.

A byproduct of such an occurrence is what follows: the wrath of a coach or an emotion-filled reaction from players. You know it is coming, but how does an official deal with it? Where is that magic point where you allow a coach or player to fume, yet make sure the backlash doesn’t carry over into a violation of the rules?

“Managing emotions and maintaining a high level of game decorum are two major keys in these situations,” said Bryan Kemnetz, a 27-year high school official from Stillwater, Minn. 

Tips for handling conflict (Source: Australian Sports Commission):

• Be professional – speak clearly and stay composed in heated situations. This demonstrates confidence in managing the situation. Avoid argument or debate, and don’t try to bluff through with unjustified rulings.
• Remain calm – don’t over-react. Stay relaxed and adopt a low-key posture/body language. Use objective, neutral language.
• Address the problem, not the emotions – try to put aside the emotions of all parties. Emotions inevitably inflame the situation. By dealing with the facts and the available evidence, the official is more likely to be seen as making a fair and appropriate decision.
• Focus on the person: people are not objects, and they don’t like being treated as such. Acknowledge a participant with eye contact and use their name if possible. Recognise that they have something to say, and don’t just dismiss them.
• Be fair – avoid team or individual bias at all costs. Demonstrating integrity is one of the greatest assets of an official.
• Be confident and open – don’t be defensive or try to justify actions. Clarify decisions when appropriate, based on the facts and the evidence presented.

Be firm – deal with unacceptable behaviour firmly and quickly. Set boundaries in a polite, professional and assertive manner.