The power of the ask. If someone said, "What's the most difficult thing you have to do in business?" What would you say? Most likely it would be asking for new work, raising money for a charity, or just reaching out for help. For many people the ask can be the most daunting experience of their lives. Others not so much.

Politicians survive by developing a distinctive style for getting others to help. Psychologists write about how much we as humans enjoy and get a great deal of satisfaction from coming to the aid of others. Twitter advisers advocate begging for the RT (retweet) as they insist it will increase the forwarding of messages. Fund raising experts broadly agree that one individual will give for various reasons to a single charity and so they must be approached various ways and times. Business coaches wax endlessly on the elevator speech and the one minute message. "It's a piece of cake. Just pick up the phone and be yourself." Not so easy.

When my book came out I was faced with a brand new ask. I've never pitched a book before. Well, not my own. It triggered a thought as to how or why it has been fairly easy for me to ask for help and how I could advise a few of you who struggle. 

However, that's not enough. 

they hearing? If you're down in the dumps and scared, that mental vibration courses through a phone line faster than an electric current. Always call on days when you feel on top of the world. Dress up that day. Even if you're all alone making calls, put on shined shoes and wear a smile. And pick the right day of the week and the right time. I like Tuesday mornings. It's also important to have passion and love what you're selling (which is the other side of the ask). It's real hard to frame yourself as an enthusiastic player when you hate what you're doing. Always be true to yourself and others will feel your belief.  

For every ask, be sure that it carries with it a gift. If you buy my book, then you'll learn to cook while getting my secret ingredients for business success. If you sponsor this or that event, then I'll list you on the invite, always spell your name correctly, put your company logo on the website, get you published, seat you at the best table, etc. Job applicants trade every day. They offer their brains and talents. They make promises to provide their new employers with loyalty, integrity, and hard work (elbow grease). All new employers and clients have huge expectations where, for the paycheck or the deal, they will get something extraordinary in return. There's always some kind of trade going on. If you're prepared to give as much as you get, then the ask will be a cinch. Remember, whomever you approach, their time is valuable. They're doing you a favor by listening to you and it's most likely taking away from tremendously important work they need to accomplish. You are the one to be grateful for their time--not the other way around. Always show appreciation as part of every ask. Good luck, and please buy my book.