FAMILY COMMUNICATION
PATTERNS THAT REAP REWARDS
Most of us have spent time with
friends and family members over the
last few weeks. During those events
did you experience people who are
great communicators? If so, you may
not have thought about the fact that
you can start right now modeling and
teaching your child effective ways to
communicate by looking at how you
talk with each other in your family.
One aspect of communication is
whether or not a person is able to
share things about himself as well as
ask questions of the person with whom
he is talking. There are endless details
about your lives that you can discuss.
By learning about what a person thinks
and feels you are prompted to
consider each other's perspectives.
With a young child, you can begin with
conversations starters like:
"Which is your favorite sweater?"
"What is your favorite chore?"
"Where is your favorite place in the
house?"
Then your child can ask you those
same questions. When you tell your
child about the favorite sweater in
your wardrobe, what chore you prefer
doing, and what your favorite place in
the house is, your child is learning
about the details in your life.
Conversation can be expanded by
discussing why you each gave those
particular answers.
As your child gets older, your
conversations can broaden:
"If you could go anywhere, where
would it be?"
"What is something that upsets you?"
"What is something you'd like me to do
more often with you?"
"What's the easiest thing about being
a kid? What's hardest?"
To put a playful spin on the discussion,
you can first "guess" what each other's
answer will be and then compare to see
what is correct. You might say, "I
think apples are your favorite fruit.
Am I right?" The child can then
confirm or correct. Children love the
chance to tell parents when they guess
right or wrong!
Some of these discussion starters may
create laughter, and others prompt
soul searching. When perplexed by a
child's answer, don't be shy about
saying, "Tell me more." Explanations
may reveal more than the actual
answers. Start these dialogues now as
a way to stay in touch into the future!
