Authentic Self-Expression - Celebrate the freedom and independence to be you! 

 As your diet and lifestyle improve, you will feel a greater sense of balance and through this process become more fully present.  You will probably notice your breath more fully, feel the breeze on your face and really listen to what other people are saying.  You will be more fresh and alert to new situations  with access to a wider choice of behaviors at any given moment.  This consciousness makes you more likely to steer away from foods and people that are detrimental to your health.

Our personalities are not fixed or rigid.  The more we slow down and understand ourselves, the more flexible and present we become.  Authentic self-expression means being the person we truly are at this point in time.  Too many people live life based on events that happened a long time ago; a difficult relationship with a parent, a humiliating situation at school, a challenging relationship that ended poorly.  Many others live life on the "layaway plan", living life as though they are constantly in preparation for something in the future, blind-sighted to the beauty of the present moment. It's time to snap out of this mentality.  The past is over.  The future never arrives.  All you have is the present.  The present is a gift, yours to treasure every moment, every day in every way.  You may have had a difficult childhood, challenges with your parents and all kinds of things that happened to you that never should have happened.  I am not trying to minimize the events in our lives that are difficult, you don't get through life without some pain and loss.  But that was then and this is now.  Today, you are an adult who has tools and options to create a wonderful life.  I urge you to let go of the past, forgive it and know that , in some magnificent way, whatever happened was meant to happen.  It is exactly those events that have made you the wonderful you who you are today.  

 

TUNING IN TO YOUR REAL SELF;
TUNING OUT "MR. PRICKLEY"

If someone asked me to name one thing that I am positive about, it would be that life never stays the same. When we talk about finding or being our true selves, it is because our life has changed and we are trying to figure out what that means going forward. Actually, until something unexpected and drastic happens, most people rarely take the time to stop and analyze who they are. We are too busy just living.

We grow older. Our circumstances change. We take on different roles in life. All this has to be navigated without a life GPS. How much easier it would be if we knew where we wanted to land at the end of our life, plug that information in, and be provided with a step - by - step guide to navigate all the decisions that come across our paths day to day. It would be even better if the GPS calculated our emotional reaction to change because it is this response that usually trips us up and keeps us from knowing how to move forward.

On top of all that, we all have that nasty little inner voice that validates every doubt, fear and insecurity that we have. You know that voice. It's the one that tells you that you aren't good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, educated enough, or worthy enough. Every time you set out to achieve a goal, whether it is writing a book or finding love, this inner whisper becomes a yell that many times drowns out your confidence. You begin to rationalize that maybe you didn't really want to do it, it wasn't that important, maybe it's not the right time, etc. And each time this happens, your real self grows sad until you stop dreaming, trying and tuning in to your real self.

Who is that voice? Why do we have it? Perhaps we were originally equipped with it to keep us from danger. But now in our modern world, it has become an internal enemy keeping us from becoming all we can be. It sometimes becomes our friend. Did you ever share your ambition with a "friend" just to have them tell you all the reasons not to get too excited because things probably won't work out? They shoot down your ideas, undermine your confidence and remind you of your limitations. They validate your internal enemy who has already told you the same thing.

The choice then becomes yours - do I cave and give up? Or do I tell both of them to shut up and go away? The difference is that you can walk away from the "friend" and stop associating with them, but your inner voice follows you home. It begins replaying the conversation in your head. At this point you need to do two things.

First, you need to step back and evaluate who you are, who you want to be and what you really, truly want and why. This knowledge is the foundation on which to build your dreams. I come from the construction world where, years ago, contractors built houses at the beach on concrete slabs. It was quick and easy. However, when storms came, the houses were destroyed because they were built on sand with nothing to hold them in place. Now drive through any shore community and you see houses on tall pier footings that don't stop at the surface of the ground. The footings go deep into the bedrock so that when water rises and winds blow, the house is safe. Taking the time to figure out your core values, passions and beliefs create deep-rooted footings on which wise life decisions can be made when life's changes and storms occur. This is easier if you have a formula that guides you through the process. I'll tell you more about the formula I use a little later.

Second, you need to disassociate yourself from your negative inner voice. How? Name it. Years ago I was struggling with self-loathing. After being in a verbally, emotionally and physically abusive relationship for nearly twenty years, I was broken. So broken that my inner voice was convinced that everyone would be better off if I was no longer alive. After attempting suicide twice, I had a moment of clarity where I became angry at my inner voice and decided to divorce it as well as my spouse. I took some time to find my foundation. But this voice would constantly prick at me, so I called it "Mr. Prickley". Every time Mr. Prickley would start his negative rhetoric, I would close my eyes and imagine turning down his volume until I couldn't hear him. I would talk back using my renewed knowledge of who I am, who I want to be and what I want giving him reasons why I could accomplish my goals. Doing this over and over built my self-esteem so that I could take the action required to walk down the path to a new life.

These two steps are vital to your PGS - Personal Guidance System. For the past five years, this system has helped hundreds of people turn their life from confusion and depression to clarity and happiness. The key is learning The 5C Solution - a simple trademarked memory tool which quickly walks you through any challenge or decision by reminding you of your foundational beliefs. People from 5 to 75 have learned it and discovered a level of self-empowerment that they never had before.

Yes, life changes. We move, graduate, change jobs, find and lose relationships, become parents, become caregivers to our parents, lose loved ones, suffer with sickness, fight addictions, etc. However, the second thing that I am positive about is that these changes can be easier when you have a formula that creates your emotional foundation. After all, you are the only you that will ever exist. You deserve all the desires of your real self!

 

By: Cindy Cipriani, Clear Path by Cindy

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