Looking ahead, whatever one's partisan perspective, we are in for a very bumpy ride.
Who knew? Very few, as it turned out. Apart from the "election forecasting guru" Allan Lichtman and Michael Moore most of us believed we were on a course to "protect his legacy", as one of Secretary Clinton's flyers proclaimed, referring to President Obama.
Full disclosure: I'm very familiar with that flyer because I spent a week in Ohio before the election presenting it to voters on their doorstep or posting it to their doors. I did so not necessarily because I consider myself a partisan. I did it because I firmly believed my passion for my work representing young males would have a more receptive ear within a Clinton Administration.
And here's why.
To begin, speaking as a male I take great pride in how we, as a sex, have begun to liberate ourselves from the strictures of an outdated, and perverse, notion of masculinity. Today many younger males, in particular, are more open to the full human experience of sharing, understanding and vulnerability. They are less anchored to older, toxic norms of masculinity that served to isolate them and cause them so much pain. Yet, even with this greater acceptance of new norms of masculinity, the suicide rate among young males is still four times that of their female contemporaries, evidencing continuing emotional strain between competing masculinity norms. While the aphorism "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and die with their song still inside them," is incorrectly attributed to Emerson, it does nonetheless capture the shackles that many males continually aspire to release themselves from.
That should be celebrated. Unfortunately, the rhetoric of the election season turned that positive development on its head. Again, speaking as an older male who is constantly trying to free himself from archaic notions of what it means to be "a man", I feel personally violated when repugnant male behavior is dismissed as "locker room talk" or merely "boys being boys." As someone who has spent time in male locker rooms numerous times a week over the course of 35 years I can attest that such talk does not occur. Even among gay males, a group to which I belong and which can be notoriously candid and loose about sexual matters, such talk is largely absent from locker room banter. Straight, Gay, Bi or Trans, real men who are confident in themselves have no need to speak that way and have no interest in doing so.
Similarly, I'm sure I'm not alone among my male compatriots in recoiling at statements like "I'd like to beat the crap out of (fill in the blank)" and "I love war". Unsolicited grabbing of anyone's genitals, male or female, is not something that any male I know would be boasting about.
Many young men today understand that these attitudes are evidence of weakness, not strength. To be sure, today many young men do not fear being labeled as less than a man because they don't condone brutish behavior or language. Many young men today don't fear being labeled sissy or faggot because they believe that those terms are archaic at best and demeaning at worst. Today increasing numbers of young men understand that masculinity has everything to do with confidence and caring and nothing to do with condescension and conquest.
Yet, this dated bravado was a large part of election rhetoric. How retro is that, and does it really make any difference anyway?
I can demonstrate how it does make a difference in the real world through anecdote. A physician colleague of mine, who is a gay male and a government employee, has been able to disclose his same sex marriage without fear of retribution because of an executive order issued by President Obama that disallows discrimination in the federal workplace on the basis of sexual preference. Since the election and much talk about reversing executive orders he now wonders whether his job may be in jeopardy because he has "come out" and the executive order protecting him may be revoked by the new President.
How's that for reality?
I grew up in the sixties - that period in time that, in many ways, represented a bridge between what our society had been and what it had the potential to be. It represented an opening to different values, perspectives and societal priorities. It represented the beginning of an openness about our country's diversity and what it means for us to be a "melting pot".
Since then we've continued forward on that path, be it with fits and starts and roadblocks erected by the darker side of politics. We've always been a relatively sane country and people, which has tempered any human tendencies by those in power to take us to extremes from which we cannot escape, extremes that fundamentally threaten to undermine our social contract through perversion of our democratic institutions.
From the perspective of many, the outcome of our recent Presidential election represents the darkest side of our politics, bringing with it the potential for unprecedented, fundamental attacks on our system of government, ushering in a period of intolerance, hatred and abusive behavior. And with it, undermining of new norms of masculinity.
As I mentioned, among the more alarming, and archaic, cliches uttered during the Presidential campaign was "boys will be boys," a cliché that suggests that reckless or abusive behavior on the part of males is naughty at worst but mostly amusing and innocent. The flip side of that cliché is that, to be a man, to be masculine, is to engage in such behaviors; to act on primary instinct and applaud brute behavior. Most importantly, not to "feel" and explore the depths of one's humanity but to shut emotion down; to "stuff" it.
Health care providers, social workers, caregivers and all who are committed to serving young males understand that traditional norms of masculinity are dangerous to the physical and mental health of young males. Yet, those norms have been given new life and legitimacy by the outcome of the election. This year's election rhetoric turns the clock back by encouraging young males to believe that it is weak to be open and vulnerable. The rhetoric provides an alternative, mixed message: crudeness, cruelty and narcissism have rewards, among them, POWER, as evidenced by the outcome of this year's election.
Reflective of our primary constituency, adolescent males, the Partnership is a young organization, representing a young movement in this country - a singular focus on advancing the health and wellbeing of adolescent and young adult males. Regardless of one's political perspective, the results of the election could have a major impact on our ability to fulfill our mission.
