1. Trust your instinct.
Being an in-patient in a hospital these days is not for the faint of heart. If you or your loved one feels like the physicians aren't communicating (that means listening, too!), or the nursing staff is not responsive or compassionate, or you just don't 'feel right,' (e.g., broken equipment, courtesy of the staff, cleanliness of your room), it is definitely appropriate to speak up.
2. Be nice.
My mother used to tell me "You get more with honey than you do with vinegar." Perhaps this goes without saying, but when interacting with healthcare professionals who are caring for your loved one, try to initially communicate with them in a way that conveys your concern for your loved one, not your frustration or anger. Though we would hope that the healthcare professional would deal with you professionally regardless, we've found more success when we've taken this approach.
Also important: Know ahead that your loved one has to give consent to allow you to speak with a healthcare professional about his or her private health information. Getting your friend or loved one to sign a HIPAA form (hospitals usually have their own version) and identifying you as "authorized" is a good step.
3. Find out the important people to know.
This is no time to be shy or passive. Besides (obviously) the nurse caring for your loved one, the two most important people on the nursing unit are the nurse manager and the case manager. Find out who they are and introduce yourself to them. Let them know that you are there on behalf of your loved one and may be reaching out to them for their support. The nurse manager will come in handy should there be any issue with the nursing care. And the case manager, in most facilities, is responsible for discharge planning and will be the 'point person' should there be any needs following discharge (like home care, or oxygen, for example).
4. Ask questions. It's OK if you don't know.
Having someone you love in the hospital can be a stressful, frightening time. Combine that with the #1 problem in healthcare being communication and you have a recipe for a poor experience. Lots of physicians stopping in, different ancillary clinical support caring for you, testing, medications, it's all coming at you fast and furious. So ask questions. Most of us didn't go to medical or nursing school so we don't know why a test is being ordered or why a new medication is being given. You have a right to know and if you don't understand, ask until you do.
5. Think or plan 1--2 steps ahead of what might be coming next.
It's all about communication. (See #4). In addition to asking questions about what is being done, try to remember to ask questions about what's coming down the pike. So often our healthcare system and the professionals in it are so busy, they're working reactively, not proactively. Asking questions about a future discharge may help because if your loved one is going to need home care or a short stay at a skilled nursing facility, you will have time to visit a few facilities (or ask around about them) and communicate your preference to the case manager/discharge planner. Trying to plan ahead will minimize the fire drill that a discharge often feels like.
If you need additional support, you can always call Guardian Nurses. We'd be happy to help. It's what we do!